First post, first hiccup
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 1,869
First post, first hiccup
Hello all:
I have been trolling here for a while and I am proud to say that in 3 days I will have 3 months under my belt. I was, excuse me, am a binge drinker...
Now here's my hiccup. I have been doing great, not missing it at all eventhough I have been going to parties etc. but yesterday was the first time that I actually missed drinking and I felt sad. I was watching the World Cup by myself and felt myself craving a Pale Ale. I am committed to living sober and I am very stubborn so I know I'm not going to relapse but man, it sounded so good.
So, I needed to talk and when my hubby got home I told him about my craving. His response:"craving... That is disgusting...". I was sad about it. I just needed to vent. His response made me mad. I just want a little support. He's been wanting me to quit FOR YEARS but I now that I actually have he isn't being very supportive. He is sad that I will not drink with him again. I actually had tears in my eyes, a mixture of "I can never drink again" and all the bad memories and lack of memories that alcohol use left.
I am glad I found this forum. I have read stuff here everyday for the last 3.5 months and feel it is really helping.
Thanks. Just needed to vent to people who understand. Nobody around me does and actually no one around me thinks I am an alcoholic. My dadinlaw actually gave me a 6-pack for my bday, eventhough he knows I'm not drinking...
Thanks guys...
L
I have been trolling here for a while and I am proud to say that in 3 days I will have 3 months under my belt. I was, excuse me, am a binge drinker...
Now here's my hiccup. I have been doing great, not missing it at all eventhough I have been going to parties etc. but yesterday was the first time that I actually missed drinking and I felt sad. I was watching the World Cup by myself and felt myself craving a Pale Ale. I am committed to living sober and I am very stubborn so I know I'm not going to relapse but man, it sounded so good.
So, I needed to talk and when my hubby got home I told him about my craving. His response:"craving... That is disgusting...". I was sad about it. I just needed to vent. His response made me mad. I just want a little support. He's been wanting me to quit FOR YEARS but I now that I actually have he isn't being very supportive. He is sad that I will not drink with him again. I actually had tears in my eyes, a mixture of "I can never drink again" and all the bad memories and lack of memories that alcohol use left.
I am glad I found this forum. I have read stuff here everyday for the last 3.5 months and feel it is really helping.
Thanks. Just needed to vent to people who understand. Nobody around me does and actually no one around me thinks I am an alcoholic. My dadinlaw actually gave me a 6-pack for my bday, eventhough he knows I'm not drinking...
Thanks guys...
L
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: C.C. Ma.
Posts: 3,697
Hi and welcome to a understanding forum that is so helpful for so many if they accept it. This and face to face meetings helps keep me level headed most of the time. Compared to the old days this feeling of being comfortable in my own skin is priceless.
BE WELL
BE WELL
Realising my life
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Dorset, England
Posts: 3,656
A very warm welcome to you, Nowsthetime 
Many congratulations on your (almost) 3 months of sobriety - and Happy Birthday too!
I'm so glad you found us. It can be so hard for 'normal' people to understand what alcoholism is like. To many (including my partner at one time) it is just a ridiculous indulgence and complete waste of time. Maybe your hubby associates the word 'cravings' with madness - rabid people who have no control!
At 3 months, I still missed drinking and felt as though I was being deprived of a treat. But I knew deep inside that if I had that treat, I would only abuse it. Now, over a year later, I no longer feel that I can't drink but that I choose not to. I feel so well now and like who I am and I don't want to go back to being the selfish wine-soaked witch that I could be once I had the taste
Vent away! You're with friends here
:
Many congratulations on your (almost) 3 months of sobriety - and Happy Birthday too!
I'm so glad you found us. It can be so hard for 'normal' people to understand what alcoholism is like. To many (including my partner at one time) it is just a ridiculous indulgence and complete waste of time. Maybe your hubby associates the word 'cravings' with madness - rabid people who have no control!
At 3 months, I still missed drinking and felt as though I was being deprived of a treat. But I knew deep inside that if I had that treat, I would only abuse it. Now, over a year later, I no longer feel that I can't drink but that I choose not to. I feel so well now and like who I am and I don't want to go back to being the selfish wine-soaked witch that I could be once I had the taste
Vent away! You're with friends here
:
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
your husband and your father-in-law just both pulled spectacularly douchebag moves.
I just wanted to say that I think that's really out of line and it's NOT 'support' and hold tight to your choice of sobriety despite that unfortunate behavior.
I just wanted to say that I think that's really out of line and it's NOT 'support' and hold tight to your choice of sobriety despite that unfortunate behavior.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: North of England
Posts: 1,442
Good going Nowsthetime!
And though the behaviour of the two guys you mention ios sad and unsupportive it is a reminder that those who either aren't addicted to alcohol or for that matter are in denial they are, have no understanding of the struggles we have to undergo.
Kick 'em in the goolies for me, but then forgive them!
And though the behaviour of the two guys you mention ios sad and unsupportive it is a reminder that those who either aren't addicted to alcohol or for that matter are in denial they are, have no understanding of the struggles we have to undergo.
Kick 'em in the goolies for me, but then forgive them!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 1,869
Thanks FreeOwl, that's what I needed to hear! Hahahaha. I'm not really angry at them. If I would be, I would be more mad at my HB than my FIL. My FIL used to call me his "drinking buddy". We would always share beer and I really never was really super drunk around him, but he lives 1.5 hrs away so I see him 1-2 a month... I pretended to share a beer when we celebrated my bday. I haven't had "the talk" with him. My HB on the other hand is another story. He has seen me at my worst, but I'm not really mad at him either. He doesn't understand, like everyone around me, that I am an alcoholic. I have know for a while, but the way other people see it I am not because I function and I'm fun, etc. My FIL doesn't understand and I love him and I don't care.
I have recognized it early and I don't want to be like that anymore. I have a 3 year old daughter and I don't want her to be exposed to that. I was never too bad but what pretty much got me to get it was when I dropped the F bomb infront of her and our family on her bday party and told myself I would control my drinking but the next wkend went out and don't even remember the cab ride home. I was by myself. Dangerous. It has clicked. The best part is that I don't even need alcohol to be crazy and fun and outrageous and loud, or to sing a capella, or dance salsa...
We'll see...
I have recognized it early and I don't want to be like that anymore. I have a 3 year old daughter and I don't want her to be exposed to that. I was never too bad but what pretty much got me to get it was when I dropped the F bomb infront of her and our family on her bday party and told myself I would control my drinking but the next wkend went out and don't even remember the cab ride home. I was by myself. Dangerous. It has clicked. The best part is that I don't even need alcohol to be crazy and fun and outrageous and loud, or to sing a capella, or dance salsa...
We'll see...
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Augusta, GA
Posts: 888
Hi,
I'm new here as well and wanted to say congrats on the 3 months! I have 40 days today and was a binge drinker as well. I remember before coming to recovery and actually admitting my powerlessness that I would make it a couple of weeks or so, but I could never see myself as NEVER drinking again...I would become sad and frustrated as well. I realize now that's just the disease or nature of my disease and now when those thoughts come I try and remember all the negative consequences I had due to my drinking and the thoughts of using goes away.
I think with time and with working the steps of AA the cravings will dissipate and the TRUE us will emerge more joyful and happier than ever!
I'm new here as well and wanted to say congrats on the 3 months! I have 40 days today and was a binge drinker as well. I remember before coming to recovery and actually admitting my powerlessness that I would make it a couple of weeks or so, but I could never see myself as NEVER drinking again...I would become sad and frustrated as well. I realize now that's just the disease or nature of my disease and now when those thoughts come I try and remember all the negative consequences I had due to my drinking and the thoughts of using goes away.
I think with time and with working the steps of AA the cravings will dissipate and the TRUE us will emerge more joyful and happier than ever!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Bay Area, California
Posts: 314
Welcome and congrats on 3 months!!!! Your husbands response makes me think he's unaware that he's processing some pretty angry feelings about alcohol. Referring to your craving for a beer as 'disgusting' is very, very exaggerated, and totally unsupportive. This is a good place for you to get support, and hopefully over time your husband will lighten up. Maybe he's scared for you to go back to drinking so it's coming out as rude and dismissive.
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