ALkapone

I am really looking for help with some kind of halfway house or sober house. I don't really know the definitions and differences. A quick rundown. My wife got hurt. She was prescribed pain pills. I shared/stole them and am now addicted. Recreationally 2-3 years. Hard core addict for over a year. Strung a few days clean here n there. Just got access (welfare insurance) a month ago. First stop was the suboxone clinic. I did ok (my best) last month. Really struggling so far this month. We lost everything. Now living with her grand mom. My wife and her g.mom as well as everyone else we associate with take pain pills. I don't think I can get sober here in this house. I would like to try a sober house or somthing like that. I would like to go back to the county (small city) I grew up in to do this. Because I have a son there, 2 kids here as well. Plus I think I have a chance of having a better sober cast around me. I don't know many people where I am now and I don't know anyone that's sober. But my I.d. And welfare card are for this county I'm in. I don't know what to do or where to go to start. I just know this isn't working. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. As far as income level... I have no drivers license so finding work in my trade is really tuff so it's pretty low now. Thanks in advance for taking time out of ur day to read this. Tried to cover as much as possible. I'm ready for a change like tomorrow morning if I can get somewhere. I'm sure this post is full of grammar, terms and assumptions that are classic first timers errors. But I'm freaking out so like I said, any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Mamahawk

Alkapone...I have been clean 19 days from a heavy 20 yr addiction from pills. I went cold turkey. I was an extremely heavy user. I took 12-14 at a time as many times a day as I could. I had to give up my car keys, money everything in order to get sober. People her in my house take pain pills also. We had to get a safe for them. That may not be an option for you. It sounds like you are serious about getting well. What about rehab? Someone in here will know what to tell you! Stay string and you can do this!

Mamahawk

Just do whatever it takes Al. It's hard but worth it. If I can do it so can you! Y'all will have to do something about access though. And hiding them isn't enough. I know. I don't know much about halfway houses or sober houses. Maybe someone else will. You CAN DO IT. I know you can!

ALkapone

Thanks. I hope I am serious. For my children. Never thought it would be like this.

Congrats on the 20 days. Cold turkey! Must be ruff. I did 2 days cold turkey n thought I was seriously going to die.

Mamahawk

I thought I would die the first three days. Lol my back seized up really bad. I felt horrible. Didn't sleep for a long time. You sound serious to me. You need a plan. Is rehab an option? It did not work for me but it might for you. I sincerely hope you can stop before you lose 20 yrs like I did.

Mamahawk

After the first week things start to get much better. It is hard but worth it. I am feeling great now with only a few issues.

Mamahawk

A friend shared this with me...blew me away. All of it is true. So true.

PILLS

I destroy homes, tear families apart,
take your children, and that's just the start.

I'm more costly than diamonds, more costly than gold,
the sorrow I bring is a sight to behold,
and if you need me, remember I'm easily found.
I live all around you, in schools and in town.

I live with the rich, I live with the poor,
I live down the street, and maybe next door.
My power is awesome; try me you'll see,
but if you do, you may never break free.

Just try me once and I might let you go,
but try me twice, and I'll own your soul.

When I possess you, you'll steal and you'll lie.
You do what you have to just to get high.
The crimes you'll commit, for my narcotic charms
will be worth the pleasure you'll feel in your arms.

You'll lie to your mother; you'll steal from your dad
When you see their tears, you should feel sad.

But you'll forget your morals and how you were raised,
I'll be your conscience, I'll teach you my ways.
I take kids from parents, and parents from kids,
I turn people from God, and separate from friends.

I'll take everything from you, your looks and your pride,
I'll be with you always, right by your side.

You'll give up everything your family, your home,
your friends, your money, then you'll be alone.
I'll take and take, till you have nothing more to give.
When I'm finished with you you'll be lucky to live.

If you try me be warned this is no game.
If given the chance, I'll drive you insane.
I'll ravish your body; I'll control your mind.
I'll own you completely; your soul will be mine.

The nightmares I'll give you while lying in bed,
the voices you'll hear from inside your head,
the sweats, the shakes, the visions you'll see;
I want you to know, these are all gifts from me,

But then it's too late, and you'll know in your heart,
that you are mine, and we shall not part.

You'll regret that you tried me, they always do,
but you came to me, not I to you.
You knew this would happen. Many times you were told,
but you challenged my power, and chose to be bold.

You could have said no, and just walked away,
If you could live that day over, now what would you say?

I'll be your master; you will be my slave,
I'll even go with you, when you go to your grave.
Now that you have met me, what will you do?
Will you try me or not? Its all up to you.

I can bring you more misery than words can tell.
Come take my hand, let me lead you to hell.

Dee74

I have no local knowledge but you can ring here for help (it's the Substance Abuse & Mental Health Services Administration help number)



or search yourself by going here
Substance Abuse Treatment Facility Locator

you can enter your location...then hit the select services button to refine your search (you don't need to tick any other boxes other than halfway house)...

you can ring around then and see if there's a place right for you

best wishes
D

finaltime

I hope you find the help you are looking for, you are right living our life for pills is no way to live. Keep posting, don't worry about how you write, just write. We are here from you. The key is to stop picking up. If pills are all around you I would suggest going somewhere if you can.

Mamahawk that poem is incredible. Really hit home with me, thanks for sharing.

cleaninLI

Call the number Dee sent you. There are social service substance abuse organizations in pretty much every city. You could search for them on the internet. That's what I did. They will set you up with a counselor, who will refer you to sober living. They may require you attend an IOP like I did. They usually have groups that meet anywhere from 5 days a week to two days....between 2 to 5 hours each day depending on the program....individual counseling once a week. They have a sliding fee schedule...you pay what you can afford....if you have insurance they will take that. Most have free job training and employment referrals to get you back to work. They will help with pretty much any welfare applications....food stamps and medical....even applying for SSI or disability if applicable. You don't have to do this alone....there are people who care.

That is pretty much your best option. I attended for about 9 months and it really did help me.

You can do this! Congrats on recognizing that you have a problem....and taking those first steps!