rove27

I know that I cannot blame anyone for me becoming an alcoholic. However; there was a major factor leading to my drinking and that was my son. Ten years ago he was 14 and would disappear for days. I would file a police complaint and that really got me nowhere. As time went on things got worse, he was fire setting and I was living in constant turmoil. Fast forward a few years and he lives like a nomad. Moves from town to town, working occasional odd jobs and couch surfing.
Yesterday he just showed up at my door after years of not seeing him. I want to drink, this is how I used to cope with the stress of him being here. He is 24 now, an adult and I have to accept who he is. I just feel stressed and needed to vent. I will not drink or smoke.....I will do my best to stay strong. I told him that I am giving him two weeks to get his act together, move out and find a job. once the pressure is on he usually gets up and wonders to another town, yet again......Just frustrated

AZliving

WOW!! Rove27 - I have one of those. My oldest Son is 29, and has the same mode of operation. He really stresses me out, too. You were right to give him a timeline for finding work. I did the same to my Son. I have not heard from him in months. The only time he calls is when he needs money. I have stopped giving him money. Take care, and know you can not change who his is, you can only change the way you deal with the situation. Stay strong, and know I understand your insanity. May God Bless you and keep you safe in His hands.

biminiblue

Oh, no. Prayers.

MrBen

Well, he's 24. Does he have future plans? He can't stay with you forever considering the damage he is doing.

Stoogy

Sorry you are having a hard time with your son Rove, you can only do your best to mould kids as much as you can but ultimately they make their own decisions and we have too live with it too.

Thinking of you Rove.
Take care.

MrBen

Sorry, I didn't read the last part.

hopeful4

You cannot control his actions, but you can control your reactions. Keep your boundaries firm.

XXX

rove27

Thank you all for you support, and AZliving I am sorry to hear that you are going through it too.........I know I cannot change him. I used to blame myself for who he was and drink and drink.....I now have accepted who he is. He had a good upbringing and he had every chance to make something out of himself, we have loved and supported him. Now he has to grow up....

Dee74

Remember you have support here Rove - lean on us if you need to

D

least

It's hard dealing with an adult kid who needs to 'grow up'. Just keep your boundaries.