You have a choice in your happiness
Psalm 118:24
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: ILLINOIS
Posts: 15,203
You have a choice in your happiness
The Happiness Habit
The Power of Positive Doing
by BJ Gallagher
“Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be,” Abraham Lincoln once wrote. I’ve long thought so, too. Happiness seems to be a habit as much as anything—a habit of attitude, a habit of responding to life, a habit of action.
I recall seeing a sign in a manager’s office a number of years ago. It read:
“Happiness is available. Help yourself.”
I loved the double meaning—“help yourself” as if a big bowl of happiness was sitting on his desk, like a bowl of jelly beans, and all you had to do was dip your hand in and help yourself—and “help yourself” as in “take action on your own behalf.” It reminded me of one of my all-time favorite books, Happiness is a Choice, by Barry Neil Kaufman. Barry and his wife had a baby boy, their third child, who was diagnosed as autistic. At first, the couple was devastated—they thought their lives were ruined and their child doomed to a hopeless future. But once they worked through their initial reaction to the diagnosis, they made a huge choice: They decided to be happy. They said, “We can let this situation drag us into depression and self-pity, OR we can decide to love our child, make a nurturing family for him, and have a good life together. They chose the latter.
They rejected the advice of doctors who told them to put the child in an institution and move on with their lives. Instead, they completely redesigned their home and their lives to meet the needs of their autistic toddler. He couldn’t meet them in their world, so they met him in his. They sat on the floor and played with him, mimicking his shrieks, whoops and wild gestures. Bit by bit, they were able to build rapport with their son, teach him new behaviors, and coax him further and further into normalcy.
The boy grew and thrived under his parents’ unconditional love, patience, and teaching—it was a long, challenging process, but he graduated from high school, then college, with honors. And throughout those challenging years, Barry Neil Kaufman and his wife chose to be happy. They made it a habit.
How do you make happiness a habit? Simply choose it. Again and again. Habits are formed by repeating the same thing over and over again until it becomes the normal way you behave. Scientists tell us that if you repeat something consistently for 21 days, it will become a habit.
So if you want to really feel the Power of Positive Doing, start by making happiness your new habit.
The Power of Positive Doing
by BJ Gallagher
“Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be,” Abraham Lincoln once wrote. I’ve long thought so, too. Happiness seems to be a habit as much as anything—a habit of attitude, a habit of responding to life, a habit of action.
I recall seeing a sign in a manager’s office a number of years ago. It read:
“Happiness is available. Help yourself.”
I loved the double meaning—“help yourself” as if a big bowl of happiness was sitting on his desk, like a bowl of jelly beans, and all you had to do was dip your hand in and help yourself—and “help yourself” as in “take action on your own behalf.” It reminded me of one of my all-time favorite books, Happiness is a Choice, by Barry Neil Kaufman. Barry and his wife had a baby boy, their third child, who was diagnosed as autistic. At first, the couple was devastated—they thought their lives were ruined and their child doomed to a hopeless future. But once they worked through their initial reaction to the diagnosis, they made a huge choice: They decided to be happy. They said, “We can let this situation drag us into depression and self-pity, OR we can decide to love our child, make a nurturing family for him, and have a good life together. They chose the latter.
They rejected the advice of doctors who told them to put the child in an institution and move on with their lives. Instead, they completely redesigned their home and their lives to meet the needs of their autistic toddler. He couldn’t meet them in their world, so they met him in his. They sat on the floor and played with him, mimicking his shrieks, whoops and wild gestures. Bit by bit, they were able to build rapport with their son, teach him new behaviors, and coax him further and further into normalcy.
The boy grew and thrived under his parents’ unconditional love, patience, and teaching—it was a long, challenging process, but he graduated from high school, then college, with honors. And throughout those challenging years, Barry Neil Kaufman and his wife chose to be happy. They made it a habit.
How do you make happiness a habit? Simply choose it. Again and again. Habits are formed by repeating the same thing over and over again until it becomes the normal way you behave. Scientists tell us that if you repeat something consistently for 21 days, it will become a habit.
So if you want to really feel the Power of Positive Doing, start by making happiness your new habit.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: South Shore, MA
Posts: 348
Awesome, awesome, awesome. I was just setting up my porch furniture on a glorious day wondering what do you do out here besides cocktails???? I am going to go in the other direction and choose happiness!!! Thanks for the reminder!
A Day at a Time
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Grand Rapids MI
Posts: 6,435
I choose to be happy with the parts of my life I can be and accept the parts I can't.
Life has thrown me a major league curve ball and it would be very easy to slip into depression. Many say I can't imagine going through what you are.
I guess I simply refuse to let one part of my life wreck the whole. Yes I melt down from time to time but I have good days too
Life has thrown me a major league curve ball and it would be very easy to slip into depression. Many say I can't imagine going through what you are.
I guess I simply refuse to let one part of my life wreck the whole. Yes I melt down from time to time but I have good days too
Psalm 118:24
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: ILLINOIS
Posts: 15,203
We get so focused not the negatives surrounding us instead of what we have to be thankful for that happiness alludes us if we don't have a positive mental attitude.
Any day 6 foot up and not under is a beautiful day
Any day 6 foot up and not under is a beautiful day
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
This is great, thank you! Totally in line with my thinking about life in general. Why it was so devastating to have this thinking and ability damaged by alcoholism...
I think what you are describing is the same idea that was discussed on other threads previously about living a meaningful life, which can only be our own creation.
My girlfriend has a similar story about an autistic child, plus a marriage destroyed; I will recommend that book to her, did not know it.
I think what you are describing is the same idea that was discussed on other threads previously about living a meaningful life, which can only be our own creation.
My girlfriend has a similar story about an autistic child, plus a marriage destroyed; I will recommend that book to her, did not know it.
Psalm 118:24
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: ILLINOIS
Posts: 15,203
Originally Posted by ReadyAtLast 
Great post Captain 
Reminds me a bit of another phrase I once heard " happiness isn't getting what you want,it's wanting what you've already got"
Reminds me a bit of another phrase I once heard " happiness isn't getting what you want,it's wanting what you've already got"
Isn't that the truth
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 458
Entering into happiness is a task that should not be taken lightly. Hereforth it begs to pounce as a taxable event. Moreover- you must get permission to be happy- from the state in the form of a license. You have to meet all the specifications and the guidlines.
01-14-2019
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,217
I just started back therapy that should ease my pain (already eased a great bit) in a month.
I'm happy for that.
I liked your post because daily I'm happy to see the birds, cows, baby cows, and all sorts of life on my commute to work.
If I commute to the city for school I'm happy to see the buildings-planes which amaze me what us Humans have come up with.
Thankyou for your post.
I'm happy for that.
I liked your post because daily I'm happy to see the birds, cows, baby cows, and all sorts of life on my commute to work.
If I commute to the city for school I'm happy to see the buildings-planes which amaze me what us Humans have come up with.
Thankyou for your post.
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