SineadOConnor

I should know better by now. I thought if I verbalized and got it out that I would start to recover. I've heard the saying "secrets keep you sick". I'm not sure I can handle circumstances and decision making regarding my mothers care. She is in the hospital with pneumonia. I confess I'm scared and I bidge drink so I don't have to feel. I know I am sick with my own disease but I am having trouble keeping my disease separate from moms circumstances. I feel alone in the decision making and its a huge responsibility being responsible for another persons well being. Thanks for letting me share. BTW, I should know better by now not to drink but just can not grasp it.

Thepatman

For an Alcoholic like me, a mother sick can be a difficult time for sobriety.

But at some point you might come to realize that anything becomes a trigger.

I hope your mother feels better, prayers your way

ScottFromWI

Perhaps now that your mother is under someone else's direct care you can focus on taking care of yourself. Verbalizing the problem is a good start, but having a solid detox and recovery plan is necessary for most of us. Have you tried any formal meetings or other recovery method? I would be willing to bet there is an AA or NA meeting someplace close to the hospital where your mother is staying that you could attend.

Dee74

It must be hard when a child becomes a carer Sinead - but Scotts right - now that your mom is in a safe place and being taken care of for now. maybe this is the time to look at your own issues?

Find support - noone needs to do this alone

D

Hevyn

I'm glad you wanted to share how you're feeling. It helps relieve the anxiety to know you're not alone.

It's so hard to convince ourselves that drinking never, ever helps any situation. I fell back on it for years - and all it did was create more misery. It doesn't help us cope with anything, though we imagine it will calm us down & take the edge off. It looks like you're learning something through all this. I hope your mom will feel better soon. Please take care of yourself and let us know how you're doing.

Anna

I hope that your mother will be getting good care where she is and that you can relax a bit and work on yourself. I know it's a hard situation to be in, but staying sober will make everything easier.

SineadOConnor

Thanks everyone for your support. Yes I realize its time for Sinead to take care of herself. I've been looking into meetings and may find one closer to where mum is. I will take your advice. As scary as it is, its time for me now. I'm not feeling well today at all. I believe its the exhaustion, so I'm just going to rest today.