Sinderos

My drink of choice is vodka. I really don't care for wine and hate beer. I like most mixed drinks I've tried and like Lime a Rita's. With that being said, I went to a company function last Thursday evening and the only thing I saw to drink was alcoholic beverages so I got a glass of wine thinking I didn't really like the taste so it wouldn't set me back. I only sipped on the glass and drank less than a fourth of it.

Silly me then decided Saturday to have a Lime a Rita at my bf's house. I only had one 24 ouncer that lasted me for hours. of course I wished I had bought more than just that one when it was close to done. Sunday on my way home (7 hour trip) I decided I was going to drink my doc - just that one night. So I bought the small bottle (200 ml). Then Monday and Tuesday the same thing. Last night I "graduated" back to the pint bottle and drank it all. I do NOT want to fall back into that vicious cycle. I do not have any vodka in my house at this time.

This has made me realize I can't dabble with a drink here or there, I have to stay away from it completely.

Another problem is I sent an email while drunk to my old boss asking for my old job back at the salary I want. Thing is I don't need to move back to where I came from nor do I really want to because I need to move on from that area. I don't dislike it where I moved to I'm just lonely because I haven't made an effort to meet people. Also, my boyfriend lives there and I need to give him up but I love him and it's so hard. He's an unadmitted alcoholic. He has been a huge encouragement for me to stop drinking. If my old boss meets my salary requirement (I kinda doubt he will), I have no idea what I'll do....if I wouldn't have been drinking I wouldn't have sent that email!!! UGH!! Why did I drink.

Anyway, I'm going to try super hard to make this my new day 1. Sorry if this was a huge ramble.

FeelingGreat

Hi Sinderos, lots of us have made the mistake of thinking we can drink again, just 1 or 2. At least you know you can't.
I hope you stay on the wagon and decide to give your new location a go.

PurpleKnight

Hey Sinderos, go at it again, you'll get there!!

least

Forgive yourself, learn from it, and move forward again.

Sinderos

Thank you FeelingGreat. I've been at my new location for 7 months. I don't know why I'm holding on to the old so strongly. I know I would begin to love it where I am if only I would let go of the past and move on. I would probably even find someone who would be good for me if I did. Right now more than ever I just need to focus on me though.

Holli

Oh, the regretful emails sent when drinking -- been there, done that!!! One more reason to stay sober, right? 65 days is super impressive, you can do it again, and now you've learned something important about your ability to moderate. Hope the job situation turns out the way you want. :-)

KateL

Just get back on the horse and keep telling yourself you don't want to go there again xxxxx

instant

Early in sobriety there are "tricky situations". i got back into it in similar manner in the past.

Over time i learned that sobriety is the foundation, not an optional extra. my sobriety is now unconditional , so the idea that there was nothing else to drink would mean i dont have anything no matter what the social implications were.

I now drink when i am thirsty LOL

FreeOwl

cheers to you for recognizing you've slid right back onto the merry-go-round and making the decision to get off before it's too late.

Well done!! Get back onto the path. What will you do this time around to actively ensure your sobriety?

As for the email and your boss.... don't worry over it. Take one step at a time and make sure that each step is a sober one.

Dee74

Some great advice here Sinderos.
welcome back

D