Two addicts down, one to go
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 41
Two addicts down, one to go
The good news is that my heroin addicted daughter and her boyfriend have been clean for 15 months. If any of you remember, this is the couple who spent a week detoxing in a tent in my back yard (during the remnants of a hurricane) because I caught them using in my house. It seems the tent detox method worked. Maybe I should patent it.
Now, don't get me wrong, nothing was easy with lots of ups and downs and near misses. We have had some great times, bad times, but are now very close and communicate well, often and honestly.
So now I have brought another daughter home because she can not conquer her bulimia. She has the same symptoms as a drug addict and I am emotionally exhausted from dealing with the first daughter.
Now the good news, my reformed heroin addicts have taken up the flag. They are stepping in to take care of my bulimic daughter. They are supporting her, distracting her and advising her. I am no longer going it alone.
Good news for today. I will enjoy it.
Now, don't get me wrong, nothing was easy with lots of ups and downs and near misses. We have had some great times, bad times, but are now very close and communicate well, often and honestly.
So now I have brought another daughter home because she can not conquer her bulimia. She has the same symptoms as a drug addict and I am emotionally exhausted from dealing with the first daughter.
Now the good news, my reformed heroin addicts have taken up the flag. They are stepping in to take care of my bulimic daughter. They are supporting her, distracting her and advising her. I am no longer going it alone.
Good news for today. I will enjoy it.
That is good news! Happy to hear it. Also your post has shined a light on the fact that I'm not allowing anyone to help me carry the weight. SR has been a start and admitting my codependency and starting to work on that, but some face to face support is needed I think. It came to me very strongly when I felt your peace from having support in your situation. So now I'm thinking….. there are many who love both my son and I yet, as you know, it is such a complex process. I don't want to break any of his boundaries either. Thank you. Much food for thought…..
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 41
Yes Lovenjoy, it is a great relief to have support. With my first daughter, I had very little support and it was exhausting. I would stand in the middle of the kitchen and just break down in tears. I had to keep my "partner" at arm's length because he was critical of my daughter and that just made it worse. My nerves and sleep were gone.
It was also hard finding support because so many had definite ideas on how to deal with my daughter's addiction. If I didn't take their advice, I was co-dependent. At times it was actually easier to go it alone.
But now it is so much easier with this same daughter taking the lead. And if you are able to find true support, please lean on them. This addiction mess is a long term problem and you have to approach it like a marathon. We need lots of refreshment stations along the way if we are ever to be successful.
It was also hard finding support because so many had definite ideas on how to deal with my daughter's addiction. If I didn't take their advice, I was co-dependent. At times it was actually easier to go it alone.
But now it is so much easier with this same daughter taking the lead. And if you are able to find true support, please lean on them. This addiction mess is a long term problem and you have to approach it like a marathon. We need lots of refreshment stations along the way if we are ever to be successful.
My therapist swears by it and I do too. A few years ago, I wasn't ready to completely kick my daughter out so that's what he suggested. It was late fall. She didn't detox at that time but she did move out rather than sleep in a tent.
Thanks for sharing your good news and best wishes for more
Thanks for sharing your good news and best wishes for more
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 27
Honestly, the addicts in recovery are probably the best means of support your daughter has, because they understand, if not totally, more than a "normie" ever could. It's good for her, and it's great for those recovering to help others in need.
Also, love the "tent detox" idea. I won't steal it though, promise. :-)
Also, love the "tent detox" idea. I won't steal it though, promise. :-)
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 41
Well, if anyone wishes to borrow my tent its available. It reeks of desperation, loss and anguish (oh and a little bit of wet dog). After a week of occupancy, tenants rarely return.
Its time for bed now, good night to all and sweet dreams.
Its time for bed now, good night to all and sweet dreams.
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