getthere

I just want to scream,i have told my ex every way i know how that we are OVER,while he was in rehab,i travelled for four hours to make sure he realised and his therapist,before he left rehab that was the situation.
3 months later ,he is out of rehab,on phone today,
HIM....why can we not get back together.
ME ....I DONT trust you,and never will again.Too many lies.
Him...i am not a liar ,it was alcoholism,i am sick,i didnt ask to be born this way,i need kid gloves,i need meetings,i need aftercare,i need looking after,i have had a very hard time,me me me...........i am sick of it.Told him i am at stage where i really dont want to accept his calls,and i need peace,sleep etc.
I am saying same thing again and again,but nobody listening.

SparkleKitty

Stop saying it and start living it. If you need peace, sleep, etc., then block his number and send his emails to your junk folder and then delete them, unread.

You've gone above and beyond. It's okay to be done. You don't even need a reason -- no is a complete sentence.

AnvilheadII

said gently, quit answering the phone when he calls. you've SAID what you had to say, but every time you engage with him, he thinks he can still get you to change your mind. you gotta walk the walk. he may never get it, that's HIS problem. done is done.

KateL

Yes, don't answer or even change your number. I have actually moved house before. xxxx

Pia

I wonder what is keeping you so attached? Is it the oh so many rose colored picture perfect life you had with him? or is it because you need to learn to detach?

spiderqueen

I can relate, Getthere. I am still answering the calls.

Just haven't been able to make the final cut.

If you have said clearly, DO NOT CONTACT ME ANYMORE and he keeps at it, you will need to block phone numbers, change email address, etc. If you THINK you are saying that but you are leaving any wiggle room, he will keep coming back.

Good luck to you, and please let us know how it goes.

tootsl1

I had all that. And even when I moved on with my life, changed my name began dating, he still told me that I would always be his wife, and in his head that would never change. It did. I divorced him, met someone else, I'm coping with my own alcohol issues, and he- he died a couple of years ago. He never changed.

getthere

He has to come collect his belongings from the house,he asked yesterday could he leave them for a few weeks,were they in my way or did i just want them out,i told him,they were in my my way,but more i want them gone,i have everything packed up,ready to go.
I told him i want to know by tomorrow if they are been collected or not this weekend,he is having a problem gettting car documents sorted ,as it was registered OFF THE ROAD while in rehab,and tax needs sorting too,i dont hate him,but i also dont feel compassion to deal with his life,he has enough self pity for both of us. i will never get involved romantically with him again.

PurpleWilder

Put his items into a storage unit with one month paid rent, in his name. Send him a registered letter informing him of such. If he chooses to leave them in storage, he must pay further storage fees. If not....

After that....no more emails, letters, texts, FB posts, phone calls, messages via friends.....nothing.

The reason he isn't getting it is because you are saying one thing but doing something else.