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Old 10-17-2013, 08:51 PM
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Dear friend

This letter was something that was handed out in my IOP today. I thought I'd share it with you.

Dear Friend,
I've come to visit you once again. I love to see you suffer mentally, physically, spiritually and socially. I want to have you restless so you can never relax. I want you jumpy, nervous and anxious. I want you agitated and irritable so everything and everybody makes you uncomfortable. I want you to be depressed and confused so that you can't think clearly or positively. I want you to make you hate everything and everybody - especially yourself. I want you to feel guilty and remorseful for the things you have done in the past that you'll never be able to let go. I want to make you angry and hateful toward the world for the way it is and the way you are. I want you to feel sorry for yourself and blame everything but your addiction for the way things are. I want you to be deceitful and untrustworthy, and to manipulate and con as many people as possible. I want to make you fearful and paranoid for no reason at all and I want you to wake up during all hours of the night screaming for me. You know you can't sleep without me; I'm in your dreams.

I want to be the first thing you wake up to every morning and the last thing you touch before you black out. I would rather kill you, but I'll be happy enough if I can put you back in the hospital, another institution or jail. But you know I will still be waiting on you when you come home. I love to watch you slowly going insane. I love to see the physical damage that I have caused you. I can't help but sneer and chuckle when you shiver and shake, when you freeze and sweat at the same time, when you wake up with your sheets and blankets soak and wet.

It's amazing how much destruction I can do to your internal organs while at the same time, work on your brain, destroying it bit by bit. I deeply appreciate how much you sacrifice for me.

The countless good jobs you have sacrificed for me. All the fine friends that you deeply cared for...you gave them up for me. And what's more, for the ones you turned against yourself because of your inexcusable actions. I am more than grateful.

And especially your loved ones, your family, and the most important people in the world to you. You even threw them away for me. I cannot express the words of gratitude I have for the loyalty you have for me. You sacrificed all these beautiful things in your life just to devote yourself completely to me. But do not despair my friend, for on me you can always depend. For after you have lost all these things, you can still depend on me to take even more. You can depend on me to keep you in living hell, to keep your mind, body and soul.

FOR I WILL NOT BE SATISFIED UNTIL YOU ARE DEAD, MY FRIEND.

Your friend........your addiction
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Old 10-17-2013, 09:14 PM
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That's the truth! It's hard to see it that way until you step back. It's like an Oprah "ah-ha" moment.

I should print that out and carry it around in my purse.
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Old 10-18-2013, 04:13 AM
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thanks for sharing this, great read right before bed.
finaltime is offline  
Old 10-18-2013, 08:04 AM
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BFD
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I cried when I read this. It's all the truth.
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Old 10-18-2013, 09:54 AM
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Truth....i wish I had a printer...i would print it out and paste it all over....
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