Hard to Quit
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Louisville, KY
Posts: 113
Hard to Quit
I am newly sober, again. I am finding it harder to refrain from drinking as I get older. In my late 20's/early 30's I could turn it off and stay sober for long periods at a time (even had 2 years once). But now in my late 30's the withdraw symptoms hit me much harder and I am a total wreck in between drinks.
I know this way of life will eventually kill me, and the last thing I want to do is leave my wife with 2 young boys to raise on her own. I need to stop, NOW! I need to write this and get it down on paper. I need to stop lying and hurting the ones I love the most. I need to find a program..and get my life back.
The obstacles I face are tough to overcome. I have done this so long drinking is normal to me and a way of life. Also I have horrible shame over some things I've done in my personal life, I drink to escape them. And for my job I travel often and drinking is always on the agenda. Oh God just please help me, thanks for reading.
I know this way of life will eventually kill me, and the last thing I want to do is leave my wife with 2 young boys to raise on her own. I need to stop, NOW! I need to write this and get it down on paper. I need to stop lying and hurting the ones I love the most. I need to find a program..and get my life back.
The obstacles I face are tough to overcome. I have done this so long drinking is normal to me and a way of life. Also I have horrible shame over some things I've done in my personal life, I drink to escape them. And for my job I travel often and drinking is always on the agenda. Oh God just please help me, thanks for reading.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 277
Originally Posted by Wharf Rat 
I am newly sober, again. I am finding it harder to refrain from drinking as I get older. In my late 20's/early 30's I could turn it off and stay sober for long periods at a time (even had 2 years once). But now in my late 30's the withdraw symptoms hit me much harder and I am a total wreck in between drinks.
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http://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publicatio...22-1/25-34.pdf
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Ohio
Posts: 186
Try looking into Rational Recovery - I found their separation between "I" and "The Addictive Voice" in our head to be a great idea to keep in mind. The urges and cravings aren't you, it's the addiction, and you can overcome anything when you put your mind to it. I'm sorry for your pain, but you can do this!
Malgudy - SS - 31-Aug-2013
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 45
I have been the worst with my personal life with all the shame and guilt. If i can do this far you can surely do better. Wish you all the success in this ultimate journey. You will see the stuff you have done in the past in a different manner when sober... shame will fade away as a mistake.. like we all make.. no one is perfect but i have experienced that people who initially become alcoholic or drug addicts are often very intelligent people who are also passionate about others feelings and want to know more about this universe .. but once they get trapped in this case of addition, he or she cannot express it without getting high/drunk... Things change in sobriety and we learn to accept our mistakes and we start to express ourselves in a normal way without any hesitation, in general there is more and more respect you see from others.. The thing for sure.. The shame of getting drunk last night will be gone off your list from the day one of sobriety and it can only getting better from there..... I have finally after 20 years found myself with my feet on the ground with a firm grip for the first time since sobriety of 39 days. I wish you all the best.. This forum is the best use of internet you can make... Smiles....
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: North of England
Posts: 1,442
The obstacles you refer to are no tougher than those thousands of alcoholics have have dealt with in the course of getting sober. AA is good at dealing with the behaviour people are ashamed of when they were drinking. I'm not pushing any specific approach but if you want to address that sort of stuff AA can help.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
welcome back WR 
all that stuff - the drinking as a way of life, drinking as our identity, getting harder and harder to quit...it's all stuff others here have faced.
Stop drinking. We build it up in our heads, but it's not an impossible task. There's thousands of people here to prove that. You can do this too
Plug yourself in here, see what other people have done - follow a way that makes sense to you....and change your life
I've never regretted it
all that stuff - the drinking as a way of life, drinking as our identity, getting harder and harder to quit...it's all stuff others here have faced.
Stop drinking. We build it up in our heads, but it's not an impossible task. There's thousands of people here to prove that. You can do this too
Plug yourself in here, see what other people have done - follow a way that makes sense to you....and change your life
I've never regretted it
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