brknheartedgirl

Hi, I'm new and in need of some advice. My high school sweet heart and I have been on and off for the past 9 years. We have 2 amazing kids. For the past 4 years he has been on drugs. I thought it was just weed and the occasional pain pill for his back but I recently found about a year ago that it was worse than that he has been shooting up morphine. Well after some fights over it he left. He kept trying to come back but I was just fed up with it. This wasn't how I wanted to live my life. He is who he was supposed to be. This past month he came to me asking me to help him and I want to but he has a new girl friend (well he says they aren't dating but they always go out of town and hang out). He said he has to decide on who he wants to be with either her who does the drugs and buys the drugs or me and his kids that will help him get clean but won't support his drug habit. This past month has been a roller coaster of pain and my family told me to just stay away from him but its hard and I don't know what to do.

SkyeSea

Welcome to SR
Few things irritate me, but when I read that HE says that HE has to decide who he wants to be with....now THAT irritates me!
Sorry to be so blunt but I think your family have a point sweetheart

Freebird13

First of all, you can't help him--only he can help himself. Secondly, addicts are incapable of loving someone else because they hate themselves. I know it will be hard to do, but you need to cut off all contact with him and make it clear to him that he has no options other than to get clean first and then down the road, you can make the decision if you want to try to make your relationship work.

longbeachone

I have to agree, but I also know that this relationship with another woman could be another symptom of his addiction (since she is a drug user as well). Addicts tend to hang around other addicts
Of course he knows better...he knows lots of things, especially that using drugs has caused him to lose everything. That said, I have to tell you, woman to woman, that I would want to kick him to the curb too. Drugs are one thing, but another woman? Almost unforgivable in my eyes (I know SR friends...My priorities may be skewed, but I'm just being honest).

Check out the Friends and Family forum on this site. You'll be able to get advise from others with issues like yours (most of the folks on this forum are alcoholics/addicts themselves, not that we don't understand these problems too). Welcome to SR.

brknheartedgirl

Yes I understand its just so hard to let go of someone you gave your life too :/

least

to SR from a fellow Buckeye.


I'd let him sink or swim on his own. He's already made up his mind, it seems, which life he prefers... and it isn't the one you hoped for.

I know you must love him but there comes a time when love isn't enough to keep two people together.

Tell him he'll have to find his own help. Then you take good care of yourself.