exhausted of trying anymore
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: brampton,ontario
Posts: 5
exhausted of trying anymore
Hi everyone,
This is my very first time going on any blogging site in regards to my alcoholic husband.
I could painfully identify with many bits and pieces of threading that I've read and I must say I'm astonished at how some partners of alcoholics have cut them self and their children short of a close to perfect,loving,bonded,normally functioning middle classed life and have settled for a low classed lifestyle with an alcoholic who doesn't really want to change.I'm surprised how some bloggers can be so tolerant of the abuse and negative behavior and its repercussions on the family and still be able to "lol" at everything like its no big deal ,just a day in the life of the abused victim of the alcoholic.
I began my dealings with my alcoholic husband 4yrs and 2 months ago counting (as his days as an alcoholic or my husband are numbered)
Unsurprisingly, I met him in a bar. But then I've met other males in bars before that weren't alcoholics.i myself can have drinks moderately and go for months at a time without having a drink at all. Actually "Frenchie's"drinking has so disgusted me that I hardly drink and I drink less now than before I met him. I also don't go out dancing or karaoke anymore due to the huge mammoth of a bill he would rack up or the embarrassment he would cause.this man has turned my lifestyle into a lowclassed unpeaceful one and me and my family have invested so much time,effort,love,trust,patience and money to what now seems as a hopeless cause.I'm new at dealing with an alcoholic but this I know :
All alcoholics' issues stem from their childhood and some are too broken inside to fix.
Its like trying to save the Titanic
This is my very first time going on any blogging site in regards to my alcoholic husband.
I could painfully identify with many bits and pieces of threading that I've read and I must say I'm astonished at how some partners of alcoholics have cut them self and their children short of a close to perfect,loving,bonded,normally functioning middle classed life and have settled for a low classed lifestyle with an alcoholic who doesn't really want to change.I'm surprised how some bloggers can be so tolerant of the abuse and negative behavior and its repercussions on the family and still be able to "lol" at everything like its no big deal ,just a day in the life of the abused victim of the alcoholic.
I began my dealings with my alcoholic husband 4yrs and 2 months ago counting (as his days as an alcoholic or my husband are numbered)
Unsurprisingly, I met him in a bar. But then I've met other males in bars before that weren't alcoholics.i myself can have drinks moderately and go for months at a time without having a drink at all. Actually "Frenchie's"drinking has so disgusted me that I hardly drink and I drink less now than before I met him. I also don't go out dancing or karaoke anymore due to the huge mammoth of a bill he would rack up or the embarrassment he would cause.this man has turned my lifestyle into a lowclassed unpeaceful one and me and my family have invested so much time,effort,love,trust,patience and money to what now seems as a hopeless cause.I'm new at dealing with an alcoholic but this I know :
All alcoholics' issues stem from their childhood and some are too broken inside to fix.
Its like trying to save the Titanic
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 807
I completely sympathize with your situation and welcome you to SR. The following statement is said with love...I am an alcoholic and my "issues" do not stem from childhood. I had loving parents and every opportunity in the world. Please do not generalize in that way, we are all different. I also know that I am not too broken to fix.
That being said I hope you can find a path to detach yourself and your children from the negative situation in which you find yourself. You will find lots of love and support on SR. You may want to check out the friends and family forum. Best of luck to you and your family!
That being said I hope you can find a path to detach yourself and your children from the negative situation in which you find yourself. You will find lots of love and support on SR. You may want to check out the friends and family forum. Best of luck to you and your family!
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,786
to SR! Do check out our friends and family forum for insight from those who have been in your shoes.Friends and Family of Alcoholics - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
I hope you find some peace in your life.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Toronto
Posts: 3,195
My alcoholism has nothing to do with my childhood. It wasn't until my late twenties that I slowly became a problem drinker due to the stresses of a career choice I wasn't happy with and anxiety over finances. That being said, understand that alcoholism is not a choice. Addiction is not a choice. But it is a choice to decide to get help, which your husband has to make for himself.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,467
Hi I understand how frustrating this disease can be for family members and relations, im a 32year old chronic alcoholic tried many times to get sober and the last period was six weeks and I gave my family so much hope that I had 'changed' and 'grown up' it doesn't work that way though- its daily battle we face- especially in early sobriety.
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