e-mail humor
e-mail humor
This goes around every few months and I just got it again. I still laugh.
A WOMAN'S RANDOM THOUGHTS
1) If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it will always be
yours. If it doesn't come back, it was never yours to begin with. But, if it
just sits in your living room, messes up your stuff, eats your food, uses
your telephone, takes your money, and doesn't appear to realize that you had
set it free....... You either married it or gave birth to it.
2) Reason to smile: Every 7 minutes of every day, someone in an aerobics
class pulls a hamstring.
3) My mind not only wanders, it sometimes leaves completely.
4) The best way to forget all your troubles is to wear tight shoes.
5) The nice part about living in a small town: When you don't know what
you're doing, someone else always does.
6) Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today.
7) Sometimes I think I understand everything, then I regain consciousness.
8) Amazing! You hang something in your closet for a while and it shrinks two
sizes!
9) They keep telling us to get in touch with our bodies. Mine isn't all that
communicative but I heard from it the other day after I said, "Body, how'd
you like to go to the six o'clock class in vigorous toning?" Clear as a bell
my body said, "Listen fatty .... do it and die."
10) I read this article that said the typical symptoms of stress are eating
too much, impulse buying, and driving too fast. Are they kidding? That's my
idea of a perfect day.
11) If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neckties? How
intelligent is it to start the day by tying a noose around your neck?
A WOMAN'S RANDOM THOUGHTS
1) If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it will always be
yours. If it doesn't come back, it was never yours to begin with. But, if it
just sits in your living room, messes up your stuff, eats your food, uses
your telephone, takes your money, and doesn't appear to realize that you had
set it free....... You either married it or gave birth to it.
2) Reason to smile: Every 7 minutes of every day, someone in an aerobics
class pulls a hamstring.
3) My mind not only wanders, it sometimes leaves completely.
4) The best way to forget all your troubles is to wear tight shoes.
5) The nice part about living in a small town: When you don't know what
you're doing, someone else always does.
6) Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today.
7) Sometimes I think I understand everything, then I regain consciousness.
8) Amazing! You hang something in your closet for a while and it shrinks two
sizes!
9) They keep telling us to get in touch with our bodies. Mine isn't all that
communicative but I heard from it the other day after I said, "Body, how'd
you like to go to the six o'clock class in vigorous toning?" Clear as a bell
my body said, "Listen fatty .... do it and die."
10) I read this article that said the typical symptoms of stress are eating
too much, impulse buying, and driving too fast. Are they kidding? That's my
idea of a perfect day.
11) If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neckties? How
intelligent is it to start the day by tying a noose around your neck?
Love this one Smoke.
Am sending it to my sister-in-law who needs a chuckle right now.
Hugs
Ann
P.S. You said the names alias's confused you. Last night on Christian Chat, Rev logged on as "Radical Rev" and I almost fell off my chair.
Am sending it to my sister-in-law who needs a chuckle right now.
Hugs
Ann
P.S. You said the names alias's confused you. Last night on Christian Chat, Rev logged on as "Radical Rev" and I almost fell off my chair.
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