Is the damage already done?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 21
Is the damage already done?
Hi,
It made me laugh, I tried to join this group tonight and realized, by entering my email address, that I had already been here, in 2008... I guess some things don't change.
I am 38 yo woman, married (unhappy marriage) and with two amazing little boys. I grew up with an alcoholic father and resented him for most of my teenage years. At around 22, I found myself working in a city where I didn't know many people. That,s when I stopped controlling my drinking. Until then, i had been a 3 beer at the bar on a Friday night kinda girl, even through university! But after university, I felt alone and realized that i could let my sadness go through my drinking. It was always when going out with friends, however I would have no control. So we are talking maybe one drunk night a week. A couple of years after, it was more often but still in social settings.
I met my husband in 2003... got married a couple of years later. About 5 years ago, family started talking to me about my drinking problems. I was in denial, thinking it was my unhappy marriage, anything else right. in the last 4 years, there has been more and more drinking alone at night, a bottle of wine a couple of times a week. All by myself, with my husband going upstairs not wanting to see me. i usually would just pass out after. In the last 3 years, there has been several : I won,t touch that again... and I have stopped by myself for months at a time. With both of my pregnancies, i didn,t touch ONE drop of alcohol either. For the last year, I have told my husband that I don't drink anymore... but i will regularly (3 times a week) pick up a bottle of wine and drink it by myself. I did talk to my doctor about it... during one of these phases that I don,t want to drink anymore... she sent me for some tests but everything seemed fine.
I would say that in the last month or so, I don't find pleasure at all in drinking, I could almost throw it out halfway, but of course i don't. but even the release is not there anymore (my body is used to it by now and the bottle of wine doesn,t do what it used to do).
I am a severe hypochondriac... I have been having throat problems for two years... I don't have lumps, I have not lost weight, no blood nothing... just a raw feeling, sometimes going to my ear. Feeling out of breath as well. I am 100 % confident that I have cancer, even if my doctor has assured me that I was fine. i am wondering if the damage done on my body will kill me soon and stop me from seeing my boys grow up and be respectable men.
Is 15 years of drinking the way i did enough to kill me or to cause some deadly disease?
I have never been this ready to quit... i am not hungover and the last drinks i had made me want to puke.
Is there hope for me?
The boys are still young enough not to notice anything... however if i drink pop in front of them, sometimes they will ask me if it is beer.
i want to be there for the boys, will I be ok?
It made me laugh, I tried to join this group tonight and realized, by entering my email address, that I had already been here, in 2008... I guess some things don't change.
I am 38 yo woman, married (unhappy marriage) and with two amazing little boys. I grew up with an alcoholic father and resented him for most of my teenage years. At around 22, I found myself working in a city where I didn't know many people. That,s when I stopped controlling my drinking. Until then, i had been a 3 beer at the bar on a Friday night kinda girl, even through university! But after university, I felt alone and realized that i could let my sadness go through my drinking. It was always when going out with friends, however I would have no control. So we are talking maybe one drunk night a week. A couple of years after, it was more often but still in social settings.
I met my husband in 2003... got married a couple of years later. About 5 years ago, family started talking to me about my drinking problems. I was in denial, thinking it was my unhappy marriage, anything else right. in the last 4 years, there has been more and more drinking alone at night, a bottle of wine a couple of times a week. All by myself, with my husband going upstairs not wanting to see me. i usually would just pass out after. In the last 3 years, there has been several : I won,t touch that again... and I have stopped by myself for months at a time. With both of my pregnancies, i didn,t touch ONE drop of alcohol either. For the last year, I have told my husband that I don't drink anymore... but i will regularly (3 times a week) pick up a bottle of wine and drink it by myself. I did talk to my doctor about it... during one of these phases that I don,t want to drink anymore... she sent me for some tests but everything seemed fine.
I would say that in the last month or so, I don't find pleasure at all in drinking, I could almost throw it out halfway, but of course i don't. but even the release is not there anymore (my body is used to it by now and the bottle of wine doesn,t do what it used to do).
I am a severe hypochondriac... I have been having throat problems for two years... I don't have lumps, I have not lost weight, no blood nothing... just a raw feeling, sometimes going to my ear. Feeling out of breath as well. I am 100 % confident that I have cancer, even if my doctor has assured me that I was fine. i am wondering if the damage done on my body will kill me soon and stop me from seeing my boys grow up and be respectable men.
Is 15 years of drinking the way i did enough to kill me or to cause some deadly disease?
I have never been this ready to quit... i am not hungover and the last drinks i had made me want to puke.
Is there hope for me?
The boys are still young enough not to notice anything... however if i drink pop in front of them, sometimes they will ask me if it is beer.
i want to be there for the boys, will I be ok?
There is always hope. Many have quit with much more prolonged and much heavier drinking than you describe. To be certain, you would of course need to see a doctor. You may want to consider seeing someone about your hypochondria too...if you can't trust your doctor you will struggle for certain. Coming here to start is a great decision...welcome and let us know how we can help.
Hang in there, ForMe. Keep getting regular physicals, tell your doctor about your throat, and think of your health as a motivator for quitting the wine (and definitely not an excuse to keep drinking -- I know that feeling myself, like "oh what's the difference I might as well").
You can't change the past. What's often damaged is our relationships. But your boys have plenty of time, and you are their only Mom. Yes, physical damage can occur -- I recently discovered I have full-blown osteoporosis, at 56! Who knows how long I've had it, but I'm sure drinking (and smoking) brought it on.
Stick around!
You can't change the past. What's often damaged is our relationships. But your boys have plenty of time, and you are their only Mom. Yes, physical damage can occur -- I recently discovered I have full-blown osteoporosis, at 56! Who knows how long I've had it, but I'm sure drinking (and smoking) brought it on.
Stick around!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 21
Thanks! My doctor is fully aware of both my drinking (however only recently, like 6 mionths ago) and of my hypochondria... And I do get regular appointments with her. She won't send me for more tests because she keeps saying this is acid reflux... and she said that i have been having the same thing for years and with no other effect... but the common link is that I have been drinking during that time.
Thanks! My doctor is fully aware of both my drinking (however only recently, like 6 mionths ago) and of my hypochondria... And I do get regular appointments with her. She won't send me for more tests because she keeps saying this is acid reflux... and she said that i have been having the same thing for years and with no other effect... but the common link is that I have been drinking during that time.
Also -- not medical advice, just a thought -- hypochondria is linked with anxiety. You might think about talking with a counselor, pastor, or even read books about breaking the pattern.
You can do this!
The human body is pretty resillient - I'm constantly amazed at how it repairs itself...but the more we drink, and the longer we drink, the chances of there being no lasting damage start to drop.
The best time to quit really is now
It's never too late, For Me...and never a bad idea to check with your Dr if you have a specific concern
welcome back
D
The best time to quit really is now
It's never too late, For Me...and never a bad idea to check with your Dr if you have a specific concern
welcome back
D
Hi,
It made me laugh, I tried to join this group tonight and realized, by entering my email address, that I had already been here, in 2008... I guess some things don't change.
I am 38 yo woman, married (unhappy marriage) and with two amazing little boys. I grew up with an alcoholic father and resented him for most of my teenage years. At around 22, I found myself working in a city where I didn't know many people. That,s when I stopped controlling my drinking. Until then, i had been a 3 beer at the bar on a Friday night kinda girl, even through university! But after university, I felt alone and realized that i could let my sadness go through my drinking. It was always when going out with friends, however I would have no control. So we are talking maybe one drunk night a week. A couple of years after, it was more often but still in social settings.
I met my husband in 2003... got married a couple of years later. About 5 years ago, family started talking to me about my drinking problems. I was in denial, thinking it was my unhappy marriage, anything else right. in the last 4 years, there has been more and more drinking alone at night, a bottle of wine a couple of times a week. All by myself, with my husband going upstairs not wanting to see me. i usually would just pass out after. In the last 3 years, there has been several : I won,t touch that again... and I have stopped by myself for months at a time. With both of my pregnancies, i didn,t touch ONE drop of alcohol either. For the last year, I have told my husband that I don't drink anymore... but i will regularly (3 times a week) pick up a bottle of wine and drink it by myself. I did talk to my doctor about it... during one of these phases that I don,t want to drink anymore... she sent me for some tests but everything seemed fine.
I would say that in the last month or so, I don't find pleasure at all in drinking, I could almost throw it out halfway, but of course i don't. but even the release is not there anymore (my body is used to it by now and the bottle of wine doesn,t do what it used to do).
I am a severe hypochondriac... I have been having throat problems for two years... I don't have lumps, I have not lost weight, no blood nothing... just a raw feeling, sometimes going to my ear. Feeling out of breath as well. I am 100 % confident that I have cancer, even if my doctor has assured me that I was fine. i am wondering if the damage done on my body will kill me soon and stop me from seeing my boys grow up and be respectable men.
Is 15 years of drinking the way i did enough to kill me or to cause some deadly disease?
I have never been this ready to quit... i am not hungover and the last drinks i had made me want to puke.
Is there hope for me?
The boys are still young enough not to notice anything... however if i drink pop in front of them, sometimes they will ask me if it is beer.
i want to be there for the boys, will I be ok?
It made me laugh, I tried to join this group tonight and realized, by entering my email address, that I had already been here, in 2008... I guess some things don't change.
I am 38 yo woman, married (unhappy marriage) and with two amazing little boys. I grew up with an alcoholic father and resented him for most of my teenage years. At around 22, I found myself working in a city where I didn't know many people. That,s when I stopped controlling my drinking. Until then, i had been a 3 beer at the bar on a Friday night kinda girl, even through university! But after university, I felt alone and realized that i could let my sadness go through my drinking. It was always when going out with friends, however I would have no control. So we are talking maybe one drunk night a week. A couple of years after, it was more often but still in social settings.
I met my husband in 2003... got married a couple of years later. About 5 years ago, family started talking to me about my drinking problems. I was in denial, thinking it was my unhappy marriage, anything else right. in the last 4 years, there has been more and more drinking alone at night, a bottle of wine a couple of times a week. All by myself, with my husband going upstairs not wanting to see me. i usually would just pass out after. In the last 3 years, there has been several : I won,t touch that again... and I have stopped by myself for months at a time. With both of my pregnancies, i didn,t touch ONE drop of alcohol either. For the last year, I have told my husband that I don't drink anymore... but i will regularly (3 times a week) pick up a bottle of wine and drink it by myself. I did talk to my doctor about it... during one of these phases that I don,t want to drink anymore... she sent me for some tests but everything seemed fine.
I would say that in the last month or so, I don't find pleasure at all in drinking, I could almost throw it out halfway, but of course i don't. but even the release is not there anymore (my body is used to it by now and the bottle of wine doesn,t do what it used to do).
I am a severe hypochondriac... I have been having throat problems for two years... I don't have lumps, I have not lost weight, no blood nothing... just a raw feeling, sometimes going to my ear. Feeling out of breath as well. I am 100 % confident that I have cancer, even if my doctor has assured me that I was fine. i am wondering if the damage done on my body will kill me soon and stop me from seeing my boys grow up and be respectable men.
Is 15 years of drinking the way i did enough to kill me or to cause some deadly disease?
I have never been this ready to quit... i am not hungover and the last drinks i had made me want to puke.
Is there hope for me?
The boys are still young enough not to notice anything... however if i drink pop in front of them, sometimes they will ask me if it is beer.
i want to be there for the boys, will I be ok?
I can promise that giving up and making that a life commitment will soon start bringing amazing and unexpected results. From money and energy to happiness ,control and a clearer look at our health issues.
John.
John.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Nazareth, PA
Posts: 453
Hi,
I'm 35 and have drank pretty much like you for the past 15 years too - taking complete breaks for 3 pregnancies and also a year here and there in sobriety. I too had side effects from quitting - loss of patience, insomnia. Nothing as drastic as shaking, but verged on panic attacks. All those side effects went away within 2 weeks. I wanted to say that I have had hypochondriacal periods in my life, and it is really difficult to get through those fears because when there is nothing wrong with you, there is nothing to find, and hence, no answers! It's an awful cycle to be in. I echo seeing a therapist for that. I find that when I have nothing to worry about, I sometimes find things to worry about for the sake of worrying.
Take care...
I'm 35 and have drank pretty much like you for the past 15 years too - taking complete breaks for 3 pregnancies and also a year here and there in sobriety. I too had side effects from quitting - loss of patience, insomnia. Nothing as drastic as shaking, but verged on panic attacks. All those side effects went away within 2 weeks. I wanted to say that I have had hypochondriacal periods in my life, and it is really difficult to get through those fears because when there is nothing wrong with you, there is nothing to find, and hence, no answers! It's an awful cycle to be in. I echo seeing a therapist for that. I find that when I have nothing to worry about, I sometimes find things to worry about for the sake of worrying.
Take care...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 21
Thank you so much for all of your answers... i have been slowing quite a bit lately...and it came with very severe panic attacks, difficulty breathing (which of course in my little mind is link to throat cancer)... I was diagnosed with general anxiety disorder several years ago and have been taking antidepressants for that.
Hi ForMe. I'm so glad you found us once again. Hope you'll stay.
I was drinking round the clock when I quit - and I'd been drinking heavily for decades. Amazingly, I've had no lasting health issues because of it. I know if I pick up again that'll be the end of me though.
It sounds like you're ready to reach out for the healthy, happy life you deserve. You can do it, ForMe.
I was drinking round the clock when I quit - and I'd been drinking heavily for decades. Amazingly, I've had no lasting health issues because of it. I know if I pick up again that'll be the end of me though.
It sounds like you're ready to reach out for the healthy, happy life you deserve. You can do it, ForMe.
Thank you so much for all of your answers... i have been slowing quite a bit lately...and it came with very severe panic attacks, difficulty breathing (which of course in my little mind is link to throat cancer)... I was diagnosed with general anxiety disorder several years ago and have been taking antidepressants for that.
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