jzeb2008

My husband and I have been getting along great for the past few days. No arguing, he's not even tripping out about big things that he would usually go off about. He's staying in touch, telling me what he's doing without me asking. This evening, I called him for something and he answered and told me that he was in the grocery store, picking up something for dinner for him and his mother. I had to get off the phone. I thought that I was gonna start crying. He barely EVER ate dinner with our family in almost a year. I HATE living like this!!!

Ann

Sweetie, you don't have to live like that. You can call a friend and go out to a movie, or you can find a meeting and begin to heal using a program that has helped so many of us.

You can volunteer and help others, you can pick up a new hobby and find hidden talents that you didn't know were there.

You can join a library and read to take your mind someplace else, or find books to study birds and nature and then go on a hike to see what you have studied.

You can join a choir and sing your heart out or you can start a collection and spend time searching out new acquisitions.

You can join a gym, walk, swim, jog or join a yoga group and learn to meditate.

You can cook and try new recipes, you can arrange a reunion with old friends and plan a fun weekend.

You can do anything your heart can imagine...and you don't have to live one more day like that. It's not up to him to make you happy, you hold the key to your own happiness. Find the joy, girl, it's all around you if you look.

Hugs

neferkamichael

zoso77

If you continue to have expectations of people who continually fail to meet those expectations, the result is often disappointment. Especially if the person is an addict.

ZoSo

AnvilheadII

what zoso said. as long as you look to others for your happiness, you will never BE happy. tap your chest...tap your temple....THAT is where happy lives...

when my daughter and I were living in my mom's basement, after my husband left, she as a toddler took markers and scribbled on the wall in one area. instead of either me getting upset or worse yet my mom, we made that HER area to do scribble as she pleased. we chose to see it not as scribble, not as mess, not as "oh my god what have you done" but as a toddler's ART work to be displayed proudly.

heart. mind. choice.

who cares what HE had for dinner? what did YOU and the KIDS have for dinner? did you talk about your day? share stories? sing? laugh? HE is not THERE....THEY are. six of them if I recall?

story74

The hardest part for me has been my broken dream of a family. My son and I do everything a traditional family does. I use to tear up and think about my xah and be so sad about what he was missing. Now, I still think about it, but it isn't as sad.

I wanted a family. Things didn't work out the way I thought it would. I lost my husband, partner, best friend and child's father to addiction. What I have discovered through this painful process is that I don't need anyone to make me happy. I make me happy. Well, my son has a big part in it too! I also realized I was mourning my idealistic notion of a "family". I never thought in my wildest dreams this would happen to me. But I will be damned if I sit around and mourn the rest of my life. You really don't need him. Find something for you! Discover who you are!!!!!!!