Starbaby928

So... I'm struggling a bit with the concept of guidance from my higher power... I'm in a situation where I have a decision to make...The decision is whether to act in a particular situation or remain passive & take what may come. I stumbled upon some knowledge relative to this situation that stirred in me an "aha" moment... Something that seemed to me to be beyond coincidence. So... I took an action based on that feeling. An action that will not immediately be consequential.

As it's not immediately consequential, I'm now ruminating over this idea of coincidence... Was I just seeing what I wanted to see, i.e. exerting my self will... Or could that feeling... That moment when I connected the dots and lost my breath for a second... Could that fleeting moment be guidance from my HP?

So... I suppose I'm wondering about others' experiences in this regard... I struggle with the idea of never taking action out of fear of exerting self-will... Generating inertia that may not be healthy or "right." How do you balance this? I've heard people have various theories, ranging from I have no control to I "co-pilot" with my HP.

HappyDestiny3

Are you attending AA... If so , then this is what you have to get a sponsor for.. So he/she is to take you through the steps for.. And questions on what to do, in real life situations..



My HP is everything... But the only downfall to it, is it still gives me free will. So I still can really screw things up.. LOL... But the great part is, he gives me the program I have. So I keep on going and getting better...

And this is why I have my sponsor, and he has one, and so on..

Plus all the fellowship I surround myself with.. With any question that comes up, someone in the rooms has lived it..

Anna

I have learned to trust my gut feelings, the feelings in my soul. By listening to my soul, I stay on the right path. Sometimes it's hard to know whether you are making the right choice or exerting your own will, but I find that spending quiet time with myself usually brings me the answer.

Starbaby928

I am in AA... I've been struggling with asking someone to be my sponsor but I have several folks that I talk through things with, ask questions of, etc. I know I need to ask one of them to officially sponsor me. It's a trust thing for me.

But- I know deep down you're absolutely right. I can't claim to be doing the next right thing without truly working the program.

Starbaby928

Thanks Anna... That moment was fleeting but was like a splash of cold water and then I acted... Almost immediately. So... I think I need to 1) get a sponsor like HD3 said and 2) learn to get comfortable with trusting my gut...

Quinne

I echo what Anna and HappyDestiny posted My HP very much speaks to me through all kinds of people, my gut has a big say and I'm much more tapped into my conscience Having a sponsor (for me) is invaluable, glad to hear you're on the lookout Basically, although there are many things in recovery that have and will continue to be confronting or uncomfortable, if I have to "force" things, then they're just not right or truly meant to be. Often this feeling or realisation will come after an action and need to be followed by more action to keep my head on an even keel HappyDestiny is on the money, IMO-I've been given free will too and sometimes the wires get crossed where my will and my HP's will is concerned! Gotta remember It's progress, not perfection

Xx

Anna

I totally agree with 'learning' things through other people. I have had people appear in my life, who helped me through just what I needed at the moment. I think this happens when you open your heart and mind. The Universe answers.

BadCompany

Welcome to the arena. You have found the murky end of the spiritual pool. Don't lie, don't cheat and such are pretty cut and dried. What it God's will vs. what is my will is much more difficult to work out. In working the steps you will begin to understand how to keep yourself out of the way. This is a big help toward finding Gods will, but even then it will often be a matter of discernment plus flying by the seat of your pants.

Remember that this spiritual life is a journey not a destination. Keep struggling to travel the right path and it gets a bit easier as you go along.

sugarbear1

Have you created a network of people you speak to on a regular basis? Sometimes the sponsor can show up in that network. Get numbers and start using the "tools" that people speak about. Your sponsor will show up!

Starbaby928

BadCompany- it is tricky business indeed... I desperately want to do the right things! But I think sometimes I'm too cerebral... I just need to let go & trust my instincts. When I was about 6 days sober, I broke down after a meeting and told my sobriety fairy godmother (as I call the woman who took me under her wing and got me established when I first came to AA) that I didn't know how I got "here" because I'm such a planner... Lol. She laughed out loud, gave me a big hug and told me how much that didn't matter.

Sugarbear1- I have a few people that I speak in depth with in the program. I know I need to branch out and widen the net. I have plenty of folks for the bad moments... Getting close to folks isn't my forte... So, it's been slow going & I think that's also creating some inaction around asking for an official sponsor. I just need to get over it. If someone says no, I just need to identify someone else and ask them... Eventually I'll get a yes...

Thank you all for taking time to respond...

Coldfusion

I really like this post, it could be titled "How to go through hell and come up smiling," but it describes suboxone withdrawal. I think it well describes the minimal role of a higher power in recovery:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-suboxone.html

deeker

I have found that whenever I feel uncomfortable about a decision, or behavior I am acting out in , then to me that is probably not my will.

If I feel guilt, stress, anxiety, intolerance, impatience, anger, guilt from procrastination, guilt from being untruthfulness etc. The uncomfortable feelings to me are a warning from God or higher power that I am in self will. I usually have these feelings when I have to high expectations of others, am trying to run the show, have to have my way, or trying to prove a point.

I feel when I am living in God's will is when I am ok with myself, feeling calm and relaxed. I call it my spiritual guage.

When you recognize your feelings you will begin to appreciate the times of peace and you will make different choices because you value your peace and are not willing to give it up for anything.

You will begin letting things go.

Starbaby928

I got a sponsor tonight y'all!!! I'm super excited! Thanks for being a sounding board and encouraging me to make that leap!!!

SB

HappyDestiny3

Great Job !!!!!!! Now that is some good news..

Dave42001

Nice work on the new sponsor.. I hope they are able to help you along with your recovery!