kizzie

I'm 4 days sober. I get anxious about socialising generally; I'm not exactly shy, just strongly prefer my own company. DH just reminded me that we have invited our neighbours (mother and 2 kids) over for pizza tonight. It's to be very casual, paper plates and whatnot. It's already been rescheduled once (originally planned for my day one but I was too hungover and fragile to deal with it). DH asked me if I'm okay with doing it tonight, and frankly I hate the idea. Our neighbours are lovely but I find social contact except with my very very closest friends incredibly draining.

So, should I power through this thing tonight or beg off again for a week or so? I'm not feeling any alcoholic cravings ATM but my anxiety and sense of dread went through the roof when DH reminded me. I told him I could do it but there's still time to reschedule (it's midday here).

sugarbear1

at 4 days, that is quite a difficult thing to do---socialize

Can ya forge through it and call it a success? You may feel better doing it and NOT cancelling again.

I know if I cancelled again, it would be enough for me to rationalize drinking again cause I would be yet again, another failure in my own eyes.

Stay strong and stay sober and be in the moment. We don't know what will happen tomorrow.

Let us know what happened.

LexieCat

Up to you, but I think on day 4 I would not have felt up to anything more social than an AA meeting.

If you can gracefully get out of it, I think I would.

That said, early sobriety feels awkward for a pretty long time. So in another week or two, you still might not feel like doing it, but eventually you have to rejoin the living. As long as nobody will be drinking at this little gathering, maybe in another week or two you could pull yourself together enough to play hostess.

kizzie

My brain is saying crap, now I need to clean up my child's toys, wipe the kitchen counters, clear off the back deck for entertaining, have a shower, figure out how to get the 2yo into bed at a decent hour while having guests over ... ugh. Then again, I won't look forward to it any more in a week or two, but then again again, maybe I'll be less wiped out at the mere thought of it ... lol I'm such a hermit. I'll have a think and talk it over with DH some more. Thanks

paul99

I'm an introvert too. I get recharged having time on my own. Socializing drains me at the best of times. Even drunk I had a hard time talking to people. Nonetheless, I can't hide under a rock all my life, so there are times I have to suck it up and power my way through it. It's not like it's the worst thing in the world. I sometimes actually enjoy it. But I learn that it's not as bad as I make it out to be.

Day 4 might be a bit too early, but it's your call. I was in detox still at that time, wondering when the blue worms were going to go away, so I couldn't imagine what it would be like to host a pizza party.

All the best!

kizzie

After working myself up into a near panic attack I talked to DH. He was very understanding and we've decided to reschedule for 2 weeks' time and have pizza on our own tonight. I was afraid of disappointing him - he's a more social type than I am - so I kept putting off talking to him until I was tearful over the whole thing. I also let him know that tomorrow will probably be a difficult day for me, as day 5 was as far as I got last week. Powering on. What a stupid thing to get worked up over. I hate how fragile and indecisive I am in early recovery, and I remember how good I felt about six months in last time. I want this to be day 4 of the VERY LAST time.

FreeFall

I'm glad your husband was supportive. Fragile is a really good way to describe how early recovery makes you feel. You have to treat yourself like you would treat a friend who was going through a huge change like this. You'll feel strong enough to be more social down the road.

Dee74

glad it worked out Kizzie - enjoy the pizza tonight

D