peanuts7

well its been 13 days since my awful hospital trip binge. my car got fixed earlier in the week and today it developed a new problem and completely refused to start. i was mad, i picked up a bottle of cider. i only drank about 250ml but couldnt get any enjoyment out of it so left the other half.

im going out tomorrow night to a leaving party which i previously mentioned here. the initial plan was to drive there so i stayed off the booze in order to get home nice and easy. but now my cars broken.

its ridiculous but my latest justification was "well if the car has stopped working, life just wants me to drink, its a sign". yeah, ridiculous.

kind of worried about it but im really hoping i can defeat this stupid voice in my head saying i have no reason tto quit and im overreacting. i want to go out, see my friend off, and hold my head high at the end of the night because i havent touched a drop...

hypochondriac

Ridiculous yeah, but we all do it. I've felt like that for a lot less. I would be slightly cautious going out if you are in that state of mind though. I know in the early days of my sobriety I went out quite a lot to things that really I should have said no to. I was determined but in retrospect it wasn't pleasant and I should have took it easy on myself.

peanuts7

thanks for answering. i feel very cautious indeed and i probably should say no, but it is sort of the last hurdle for the forseeable future really. this is the last drinking-related event im expected to attend. i agreed to this one prior to the hospital trip, if it had come after i would have said no.

plenty of people go out and dont drink, its amazing how much thought and stress goes into it when you've got a problem.

hypochondriac

It does get easier. Just because other people do it though don't let it undermine how hard it is for some of us. Even though other people can not drink and not give it a second thought, every event I got through sober in the first few months were a miracle and a major victory. I am pretty sure I have never been prouder of myself. Now I am getting to a stage where I don't give it a second thought Good luck and let us know how you get on. This is the right place to celebrate those victories x

Dee74

I used to think silly things like that too - I also used act like every party invite might be the last one, too...

If you're shaky in your recovery and you have no escape route from this party, common sense suggests it might not be the best idea you ever had to go peanut.


It's funny how we think 'Life' is telling us to drink but we don't think about when it might be telling us not to.

D

Anna

Early recovery is a time when I HAD to learn to say 'NO' and mean it. If I hadn't, I wouldn't be alive today. You don't need to go to the party. Are you ready to stop drinking?

sugarbear1

So sorry you already picked up and drank.

I kinda think the lesson was Don't Go Tomorrow to that party cause drinking isn't worth it today.

Start again! Life will happen, we have to keep staying stopped and moving forward, not backward! We're worth it!!!!

With love & hugs,
~SB

LexieCat

If you're thinking you MIGHT drink--if you're worried about it even SLIGHTLY--it isn't worth the risk, IMO.

You have nothing to prove to anyone. You have your whole life to prove you can be around alcohol without drinking any. Now is not the time to be doing that.

Geeze, you are 13 days from a binge that landed you in the hospital. If it was for a sprained back you wouldn't feel compelled to take part in a limbo contest. SKIP the party. If you feel compelled to see your friend off, take him/her out to lunch or something.

FreeFall

It's all in how you look at things and rationalize them. A broken car could be a sign you're meant to stay home too. I've found that as much as I always could find an excuse to drink, now that I've stopped I can find just as many reasons not to. Try not to think like a drinker, try to think like a non drinker.

The leaving party sounds risky in your current state of mind. Also, if you can't drive, you can't leave if/when you need to which is something to consider. Try to give yourself a chance to succeed, not fail