deeker

Ya know when I was still out there my ideas of fun were pretty messed up.....

I thought fun was sitting in a dark bar on a sunny day in Florida all by myself hoping to strike up a conversation with some cute guy........

Believing in my sick warped mind that I was cuter and more interesting to be around after each drink........

They didn't need to be too cute after awhile either.lol......

I must have thought I was invisible too after about the 12th drink when I started dancing and pretending I was a dart champion like a crazy fool. lol.....

See I can laugh about this now and one day I think you will too...........

Then I would close the bar and drive home drunk and wake up not remembering and feeling sick to myself saying why, why, why?.............

Or maybe I would wake up in some strange guys bed. That happened more than once and I was snoring so loud he kicked me out of the house.......

You can imagine what that ride home was like. The shame, oH the shame......

Yah that was not to fun. Or I would get all the beer I could drink and go out on my boat all by myself thinking I was gonna have this great time and meet people and then find myself after the 8th or 10th beer feeling so sad and alone.........
It was so not fun looking back.What I then called fun I now call insanity........

When I finally surrendered to this program and started taking suggestions, and I can't stress this enough. Taking suggestions! I realized what fun really was........
If your new I want you to know I felt the same like life would be boring without a buzz. But today my idea of fun has changed.........

Today fun for me is waking up clear minded and walking along the beach..........

Today if I don't pick up I have an pretty good idea how the night will end up, and it is usually pretty good..........

I continue working this program like it was suggested and I trust in a higher power and my life is improving so much.

I know many, many people who feel the same way.......

So my ideas of fun have really changed.I can get up early and watch the sunrise and not still be woozy from the night before...


This was probably the best summer I have had in my life. June AA kick ball game , July AA beach bbq, August AA Movie night, Sept, AA beach volleyball, Oct AA Halloween party, AA Thanksgiving dinner and last month New Years Eve Dance.
Bonfire meetings weekly.........

I went to Disney, a UCF Football Game, Daytona beach, Treasure Island. I don't know how I did it cuz I am broke but when I submit my will to my higher power great things happen to me.......


I have fun beyond anything I thought was fun in the past. I create days I am so proud of and do not look back on with regret.......

I had to get involved in service to get out of myself out of self pity.I actually began to feel good about myself cuz I was and am trying to be of service to others........

So please give The AA/NA program a chance and ask someone to help give you some suggestions ..

You will see this program working in your life too. I am sober and happy and I tried to commit suicide almost 11 mo ago. 7 jails, 14 institutions prior to that.......

God Bless You all

2granddaughters

My Ideas Of Fun Have changed

I used to think that ending up in jail and beating the rap was cool.

Today, walking by the courthouse with my granddaughters on our way uptown for ice cream is way cooler !!

All the best.

Bob R

artsoul

That was really inspiring...... and so true.

vegibean

NICE deeker.

kizzy40

Thankyou for sharing your experiences, I have wasted so long hours of solitary drinking when there were hundreds of other things I could have been doing... oh well better late than never

veryready

Awesome.

CAPTAINZING2000

I heard a guy pretty well sum it up a while back at a meeting. At first drinking was fun then, it was fun with occasional trouble, at the end drinking was nothing but trouble.
Had I only known years back how much more I was missing in life by not being sober, I'd of hit the rooms a lot sooner. So glad, you're enjoying life with out the misery drinking brings.

quitforme79

Beautiful post deeker I really needed to hear this...gives me so much hope. AA has been wonderful for me thus far and is really helping me work on my recovery and stay sober. Hugs to you! Very inspirational!

deeker

I used to think that ending up in jail and beating the rap was cool.


Bob R[/QUOTE]

Right I agree. lol I am thrilled to go to church on Sunday.

deeker

[QUOTE=quitforme79;3778452]Beautiful post deeker I really needed to hear this...gives me so much hope.

Thanks Quit. Glad you are here in this forum. I can talk anytime. Have a blessed day!

Sasha4

I agree.

How did I ever get to thinking that laying in bed, sweating, hungover, paranoid, smelling, cringing with shame was an awesome way to spend my time?

FreeFall

Deeker, what a fabulous post! Thank you for sharing that with us-so glad your story has taken such a turn for the better! Nothing lonelier than sitting in a bar drinking hoping to meet someone, and then drinking enough so meeting anyone at all becomes appealing. Don't miss those days!

deeker

[QUOTE=FreeFall;3778704]Deeker, what a fabulous post!


Thanks Free Fall, Yah life is pretty good ! I now need to battle my other addiction. Chocolate!

deeker

That's right kizz, change today and you will change your future one day at a time.