OT Had a date this weekend
A jug fills drop by drop
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,784
OT Had a date this weekend
I was going to have some dinner on Sat. and I ended up having dinner, watching a movie, sleeping with the guy (Indeed sleeping. There was nothing physical at all. His house is far away and the highway is not the safest so I stayed... a gentleman), having brunch and walking around downtown.
Anyway, he is 2 years younger than I am, looks way younger, is kind of funny. He let me know he wants nothing serious and that is fine with me (with my broken picker and all) just someone to pass some time with.
I am not sure if things will get physical. Maybe it stays platonic. Not sure if I want to feel that vulnerable. I admit its interesting to feel attracted to someone in that way again. But hey at least we are clear about things. It felt good to feel I "got it" still. I am 30 but internally, have felt ANCIENT.
Just an update as I am feeling cheerful
I need things like these to get me motivated, so gym, here I go LOL
I am turning 31 soon and we will go for his first skydive and my second one soon. I invited my best girlfriend and his boyfriend. I had forgot life is meant to be fun. I am glad I am remembering that life is good and that I am free.
Anyway, he is 2 years younger than I am, looks way younger, is kind of funny. He let me know he wants nothing serious and that is fine with me (with my broken picker and all) just someone to pass some time with.
I am not sure if things will get physical. Maybe it stays platonic. Not sure if I want to feel that vulnerable. I admit its interesting to feel attracted to someone in that way again. But hey at least we are clear about things. It felt good to feel I "got it" still. I am 30 but internally, have felt ANCIENT.
Just an update as I am feeling cheerful
I need things like these to get me motivated, so gym, here I go LOL I am turning 31 soon and we will go for his first skydive and my second one soon. I invited my best girlfriend and his boyfriend. I had forgot life is meant to be fun. I am glad I am remembering that life is good and that I am free.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Real World
Posts: 729
31? Dear God, take your Geritol before that skydive..... Ancient.
;-). When you hit 40, you may whine. ....but several of us will tell you to hush because we will be enjoying our mid fifties.
30... Sheesh, I got a25 year HS Reunion this summer and she thinks 30 is old... Kids today, no perspective....
;-). When you hit 40, you may whine. ....but several of us will tell you to hush because we will be enjoying our mid fifties.
30... Sheesh, I got a25 year HS Reunion this summer and she thinks 30 is old... Kids today, no perspective....
A jug fills drop by drop
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,784
My first date went very well. He was nice and complimented me. He held my hand and we walked through various charming streets. Talked for hours in a park. Then we had something to eat. He invited everything. Then I had to go somewhere else and he insisted on taking me as close as he could.
In the end he kind of wanted to give me a kiss on the lips, but I was in a hurry -and I am a lady lol- so I left...
Overall he was sweet and charming.
I have a second date this Friday and perhaps a 3rd one on Saturday.
I am nervous and have no idea what to wear.
He is very close to what I imagined for myself, another designer/artistic type with the same political views, he is also kind of vegetarian and he also loves cats
Unfortunately he does not seem to want something serious and looks like he loves his freedom- also, we live in different cities - and I *might* move to US temporarily for work, so its not very probable that this will develop into something else.
Perhaps its better this way, I know with my unresolved issues that I would start behaving like a codie and start seeing everything as abandonment --
In any case, I like to be with someone more similar to who I am, and more able to enjoy the present, and enjoy some good feelings.
Its difficult to start opening up to someone again, I know I have built too many walls around my heart. I can feel my fears. I am trying not to feel much too soon and just let things flow. At least its refreshing to know there are more "normal" people out there and I am attracting a different kind of fellow (hopefully)
The other day I was walking downtown and saw a foreigner taking close captions of flowers on the street, just as I do! that gave me hope. Funny how someone can give you hope, without even knowing.
In the end he kind of wanted to give me a kiss on the lips, but I was in a hurry -and I am a lady lol- so I left...
Overall he was sweet and charming.
I have a second date this Friday and perhaps a 3rd one on Saturday.
I am nervous and have no idea what to wear.
He is very close to what I imagined for myself, another designer/artistic type with the same political views, he is also kind of vegetarian and he also loves cats
Unfortunately he does not seem to want something serious and looks like he loves his freedom- also, we live in different cities - and I *might* move to US temporarily for work, so its not very probable that this will develop into something else.
Perhaps its better this way, I know with my unresolved issues that I would start behaving like a codie and start seeing everything as abandonment --
In any case, I like to be with someone more similar to who I am, and more able to enjoy the present, and enjoy some good feelings.
Its difficult to start opening up to someone again, I know I have built too many walls around my heart. I can feel my fears. I am trying not to feel much too soon and just let things flow. At least its refreshing to know there are more "normal" people out there and I am attracting a different kind of fellow (hopefully)
The other day I was walking downtown and saw a foreigner taking close captions of flowers on the street, just as I do! that gave me hope. Funny how someone can give you hope, without even knowing.
A jug fills drop by drop
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,784
Its definitely different, after an XABF, and its tricky business.
I do not want to go "YAY!! he did not insult me, he is the best man ever!!"
I know the ones who have dated or are dating after an XABF or XAH know what I mean...
I do not want to go "YAY!! he did not insult me, he is the best man ever!!"
I know the ones who have dated or are dating after an XABF or XAH know what I mean...
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 16,246
Dear TakingCharge, please remember that he has told you who he is!!! He doesn't want anything "serious".
It is so easy to become infatuated with someone who has what we percieve as many positive traits---and forget that they warned us that they don't want anything serious.
Many men regard sex as fun and recreation---whereas women so often connect sex as proof of love. This is very important to remember, right now.
Don't let your heart lead you into a situation where he won't take it "seriously" in the end.
I don't mean to be a buzzkill, but giving your heart to someone who isn't serious is the biggest buzzkill of all!!.
What I am trying to say is---I'm glad that you are having fun again, but protect your boundries. Perhaps date some others as well and don't get confused o n the sex thing.
sincerely, dandylion
It is so easy to become infatuated with someone who has what we percieve as many positive traits---and forget that they warned us that they don't want anything serious.
Many men regard sex as fun and recreation---whereas women so often connect sex as proof of love. This is very important to remember, right now.
Don't let your heart lead you into a situation where he won't take it "seriously" in the end.
I don't mean to be a buzzkill, but giving your heart to someone who isn't serious is the biggest buzzkill of all!!.
What I am trying to say is---I'm glad that you are having fun again, but protect your boundries. Perhaps date some others as well and don't get confused o n the sex thing.
sincerely, dandylion
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 124
I know when I was still hurt after my wife cheated and we divorced, I posted an ad saying nothing serious.
I was afraid of being hurt. But now I let her in and just now realizing I have an AGF.
Regardless, congrats, moving on and finding happiness is always welcomed.
I was afraid of being hurt. But now I let her in and just now realizing I have an AGF.
Regardless, congrats, moving on and finding happiness is always welcomed.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
