Expressing anger in a covert, unhealthy way.
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Join Date: Aug 2005
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Expressing anger in a covert, unhealthy way.
A sister and an aunt by marriage does this.
By-marriage aunt once remarked to me that her LATE husband didn’t like my LATE stepfather. What?? What did it matter--both men are dead?
The sister remarked to me that she was glad her mother-in-law and our mother were dead. If we were close and she was in the habit of sharing her innermost feelings with me, that would be one thing. But we aren’t and she isn’t.
When people say something like that, it’s kind of a shock, like a bucket of water being thrown at you. I am taken aback and don’t know what to say.
Here’s what I think I’ll say in the future: “Why are you telling me that?”
Both of these women are just being hateful. They both are full of anger; I think they are angry most or all of the time and sometimes it just comes out, or they just feel like letting some of it out when they aren't around somebody they're trying to impress with their facade of sweetness and light.
Your thoughts?
By-marriage aunt once remarked to me that her LATE husband didn’t like my LATE stepfather. What?? What did it matter--both men are dead?
The sister remarked to me that she was glad her mother-in-law and our mother were dead. If we were close and she was in the habit of sharing her innermost feelings with me, that would be one thing. But we aren’t and she isn’t.
When people say something like that, it’s kind of a shock, like a bucket of water being thrown at you. I am taken aback and don’t know what to say.
Here’s what I think I’ll say in the future: “Why are you telling me that?”
Both of these women are just being hateful. They both are full of anger; I think they are angry most or all of the time and sometimes it just comes out, or they just feel like letting some of it out when they aren't around somebody they're trying to impress with their facade of sweetness and light.
Your thoughts?
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Join Date: Oct 2006
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Hmmm... my thought is that I probably wouldn't ask "why are you telling me this?" because... well, frankly, that would be disingenuous because I wouldn't care to know.
I think I would probably treat it like I treated AXH's rants. By saying "I'm sorry you feel that way" or (this was really useful) "Oh."
I think I would probably treat it like I treated AXH's rants. By saying "I'm sorry you feel that way" or (this was really useful) "Oh."
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