iswhatitis

First timer. Been helping ex-boyfriend with getting life on track. We stopped dating at the end of 2011 (bout a year ago). I had about nine years when he (at just over a year sober) went out with injecting something. That was after we stopped dating. He says it's a form of HGH which gives him energy. I know that doesn't show up on drug screenings which he has all the time when he's on the job in construction.

So, I helped him get on his feet, get a job, deal with his parenting plan issues as he was being irresponsible with visitatiion, stay a month at my home and then get a room at a nice home. Get his financial house in a lot better shape than it was with the beginnings of an emergency fund. Then, a few weeks ago, he wend out again for about two weeks reaking havoc on his finances again, car at impound, trouble with rent.

I don't have time to write much more right now but I'm crashing emotionally about my role in rescuing him financially and otherwise. He doesn't owe me anything right now but the pattern is that I bankrole him out of trouble, oversee his money as he earns it, making sure he pays off me over time along with other debt like child support etc. It hurts so badly to watch his downward spiral and know that there's not anybody out there willing to help him. At the same time, I do believe that I should not be in that role with him. I'm not his girlfriend or mom. I work hard to take care of myself and have always navigated my financial responsiblilities.

Leaving that on the floor for now. Got to run now. Just writing that down makes me feel embarrassed that I put myself in this position. I have two kids that are tween and teen. I should be focusing on me and them.

TorontoGuy28

It is nice of you to help out, but IMHO you are an enabler to his demons.

Concentrate on yourself and your kids.

There is no way for you to solve his problems.

MIRecovery

Sounds like it is a good time to cut the cord and get out while the getting is good