Missy7

I wouldn't want to let people with fewer days think things don't get better, but they are not automatically lovely. They have been that way for me other rounds, but this round I am so anxious and I don't feel all that well.

I have a family drama going on right now. It's so complex I won't even take a stab at it except to say that I'm the youngest of six sisters (parents long dead) and sisters 4 and 5 died of substance issues last year.

So the sisters started acting oddly yesterday and I raced home to get on SR instead of doing the normal thing--stop at the store. And I sat on that couch till I fell asleep (having only one hysterically phone call).

But today I feel hungover! And I'm SO nervous. All I could do is get to work so I have a normal environment. Hubby is working super long hours and I'm utterly alone. I'm really worried.

But I marked my four day complete hash mark on the white board at home and I'm staying the course.

When is normal? What is normal? Maybe I'm not going to like myself after all.

Missy7

And then, as I push submit, a fire alarm! What now?

freshstart57

It will take some time for things to settle, Missy7, just carry on being yourself. Everybody else is taken already anyway.

johnnybgood

It sounds to me like you need to try to do something to keep your mind occupied. Nothing is so hard as quitting something when all you're doing is sitting around thinking about how much you want to do it. Read a book, or go for a walk/jog- those activities are usually sufficiently distracting for me! Good luck!

FreeFall

I'm sorry for the loss of your sisters. That must have been a scary wake up call. You are doing well so far. You're right, it's not all going to be lovely when you quit. We spent years abusing our bodies and both mind and body have to adjust to the new lifestyle. Add family stress and drama and it's more of a challenge. I think it will take a long time for "normal" to come, but I wouldn't focus on that. Just focus on right now, and find things to soothe and distract yourself from the head games.

notsleeping

Sorry for all your losses

NewHouse2012

Hi hon. It's different for everyone but it took a good month for me to feel emotionally stable with no drama going on. If you can just hold on and ride these waves you will find peace on the other side. Hang in there!

Dee74

Not to put anyone off either, but it took me a good 90 days to feel emotionally stable Missy - and that was without any family drama.

It's day 5...I was barely out of bed by then...you're doing well...give yourself time to grow and adapt...*then* do the evaluations

D

ForMyGirls

Great...

I'm on day 2 and my Firm is hosting a HUGE conference next week. Several hundred attendees, AND I'll be SPEAKING!!!

Uggg... Sure hope I'm not going to suffer any type of delayed reactions, emotional/anxiety/physical or otherwise... Feeling fine so far, but I hate public speaking to begin with...

Maybe I picked the wrong week to quit!!! (Just kidding)... :rotfxko

Fandy

hope you are feeling better as the day went on....get some good sleep and tomorrow should be better.

a wise woman on these boards (Ann) told me that the difference between a good day and a bad day is about 2 days...it's very true.

Missy7

Thanks All--Dee and Fandy. I have done okay today after all. I got a lot done and at one point I just got up and walked out of my building. Walked around the whole campus. Now I'm getting ready to conclude for the day and I'm more under control.

Thanks again for being there. Checking in now and then to read encouragement has helped.

Natom

Sorry for your loss Missy. Losing someone is hard at the best of times. It took me about 90 days to become emotionally level. Even then I am not there all the time now. I take it one day at a time.

Anna

I'm glad you;re feeling better, Missy.

And, for what it's worth, my first week was not easy. I managed to do the basics but I wasn't going beyond that. Be patient because it will get better.

Missy7

Thanks guys--dinner is done and I'm in for the evening. Made it!

C23

Missy, i can tell you that running helped me a lot. The chemicals released that give you that "runners high" put me in a really good place. The other thing i noticed when i got things under control was that since i was no longer in an alcoholic fog, life was much more intense and real. Your eyes are open my friend. You will adjust and be a better and stronger person for dealing with things the right way.

Missy7

Day Six is promising. The problems are rolling in and I'm just managing them. A much better day--but it's early

Mizzuno

Hey Missy.
With each day we start to feel better and better. You made it through last night and i am pretty sure that you can make it through this day.
I was about a week sober when I encountered my first emotional hangover. It took me all weekend to shake it off. slowly but surely my emotional and mental state started to improve. ( that isnt saying much )
Good for you Missy.

frances2011

Sending you support for a good day. You can do this. You are a fighter.

My family's dramas can and have knocked me six ways to Sunday, over and over. I relate in my own way to the pain and dramas you are experiencing, whatever they are.

My experience is that Sobriety and all my self-care practices are helping me build genuine, bedrock-level self-esteem for the first time. This foundation cannot be shaken.

I believe in you.

Fandy

hope all is going well today, you're getting closer to a week!

lilgolden73

So sorry for your loss ! I have had to separate myself from my family its the only hope I have to recover....