forabetterlife

I never really understand what the term pink cloud actually meant or just thought that it didn't really apply for me. But now that I am into my 2nd month of sobriety I think I'm beginning to see was it is- well what it was for me. For the first few weeks, we are so fascinated by the newness of being sober all the time, everything seems brighter. Good sleep (for me, anyway, I know others don't sleep well at first), waking up without a hangover (HUGE), getting things accomplished, new found energy (after the first week or so),and just our minds opening up mentally and really feeling alive. It truly was like a natural "high", seeing and feeling all that we miss when we are caught up with drinking and feeling the effects of alcohol.

But the past week or so, it feels like I have flatlined. Not depressed, I just feel blah. Almost as a tradeoff, my cravings have diminished..I still want to drink during my "regular time", but I know I won't, it's just a feeling. I am still happy and grateful to be sober, to NOT be drinking, but the excitement of it has worn off. And a few times a day, I become extremely emotional. Yesterday, I was literally laughing really hard with my girls at something, and...mid-laugh...I burst into tears and couldn't stop crying. I am thinking and feeling things that I think I repressed with alcohol for years.

Anyway, I am sure all of this is normal, it's just good to say it and to hear other people's experiences. The pink cloud may be gone, but I don't feel complacent, so that is good. Going back to drinking is not an option for me. But I miss that happy feeling

Sapling

This is from the 9th step promises of AA....These promises came true for me....And countless others. When I read the Big Book they were one of the things that really stood out for me...There are a lot of promises in that book that come true from working the steps. For me it was like getting that pink cloud back. Is every day perfect for me?....No...But life is better than I could have ever imagined.

We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace.

keithj

I was out with a friend yesterday, another person solid in the AA program, and this topic came up of how the pink cloud doesn't end. It doesn't have to be a transient experience. Both of our experience has been, that after many years in recovery, that happy, giddy, grateful, blessed beyond words, and filled to the point of overflowing feeling is still with us.

instant

Sobriety is an adventure. Not everyday will be bliss- there are challenges. The first six months for me was a period where my emotional state worked it's way back to an even footing.

The daily practice of gratitude made a huge difference to how I handle the bumps along the road. I highly recommend it if you have any tendency (like I do) to being a "glass half full" type, or (if like me) your humour rests largely on the sardonic, cynical and ironic viewpoint.

RobbyRobot

No worries. That happy feeling and more, can easily return in spades. Soon enough, your happiness will feel coming from deep in your bones, like an unending river of extraordinary experiences. It took me clearly a few months to actually believe what good fortune I was having with sobriety, and just under a year for me to absolutely stake my life on the strength and veracity of my new sober life. And from there, just under three years to scrape clean the rest of the crap outta my psyche, and so bring fulfillment of the promises which are, well, promised with AA sobriety. And just to be clear: AA is not the only path to enjoy those promises.

Awesome on your 2 months!

Live2Run25

I am experiencing the same thing at the moment. I'm happy to be sober, but the novelty has work off and i'm not as happy as I was in the beginning. However, almost everyday I remind myself that being sober is much better than how I was.

Sugarfix

Am on day 17 of being sober and am bored. Get the odd craving for Wine now and then but nothing I can't handle.

I went from being really positive about it to just.. nothing.

Still got bloodshot eyes too. Not sure why that is!

Know how you feel.

Itchy

What do you want? What is your vision for your life? Like Robby I have found in my two years sober that it took a year to really shake off the cobwebs, and then my whole second year was fixing what was broken, and doing the challenges I had sidestepped with alcohol. I am on a similar time line to your's Robby, thanks for the road map because now just starting my third year I have thought that is exactly what I am doing.

What I do know is that we avoided and procrastinated with alcohol, and that was likely because we thought hedonism had no consequences. Regardless, I have found that it can be daunting to try to fix things all at once. And that there is no neutral in life, just forward and reverse.

The problem many face is that when they don't know where they are going, they will always end up someplace else. The single biggest thing i realized after a year was that I could actually do things, and go places again. No DUI or fear of being hurt, and all that beer and cigarette money if saved allowed me to do a lot of things I could not afford before.

I don't blame anyone for being afraid to go, with no firm destination in mind. Standing still and waiting for things to be shown to us just slows us down from first mapping out our dream life and then going for it!

First decide what you want. Not what your parents wanted. Not what society dictates. Not the adult dreams but go back to the ones you were told you can't and gave up to be adult! The trouble is we throw the baby out with the bathwater. Yes we need to drop the childish, but not the "childlike," that sense of wonder.

Go back and dust off the dreams you thought you never could and decide again. Then get your vision for your life not mine or another's, those are taken. Then start doung something instead of just dreaming.

"Action without vision merely passes the time.
Vision without action is only a dream.
Vision with action can change your world!"
Joel Barker

Get your vision, answer the question "what do I really want?" Then get going. I finally got a "Round Tuit."

Be patient with yourself, but not so patient you are comatose and think the mountain will come to you.

Stop getting ready and start getting to it.
Not the tomorrow that never comes. Not when everything is right and there is no stress, and not with conditions like as long as I don't have to whatever, and not waiting for it to fall from the sky or be instantly available through a pill.
Stop getting ready and start getting to it.

wpainterw

It's great that sobriety is working for you. Eventually the blahs will give way to a more stable and long lasting period. Right now, however, at least if I can speak from my own experience, is the most dangerous time for a person in recovery. I can remember saying to myself, "I feel back in control now. I can handle it. It won't matter if I happen to pick up one small glass of wine or beer at a party just so I fit in with the rest of the folks." All I can say from my own experience is that it did matter. As soon as I did that it seemed like there was something inside my body which said, "Yes! Yes indeed! We're back in business!" Like an old race horse smelling the track. We're off and running! So it was indeed, only one glass of wine that evening, but soon it was more than one glass and then something quite different than wine. The slippery slope is more gradual at first but it steepens rather rapidly and as the illness progresses, as I got older and had one relapse after another, the slope was steep indeed. Finally, I started drinking (only sherry!) on Thursday and one week later I had to be hospitalized with possible irreversible liver damage. Luckily it did reverse itself but it was enough of a wake up call so that it was my last drink. Another time around might well have killed me.
So that pink cloud is a dangerous place. Folks on the cloud are proud of themselves, even consider that they've become experts at recovery. Like that book entitled, "I'm All Right Jack!" It's better not to trust yourself one inch because there's a sort of a beast inside the brain which wants that alcohol real bad and it's very clever about getting just what it wants. All sorts of ways of dealing with that. Close contact with others in a recovery program, possibly random urine testing. Beware of renewable prescriptions or prescriptions in large amounts. Avoid places where there's lots of drinking, even if you have to pass up a wedding or a christening.

W.

Itchy

I had to stop for a knee surgery and for three months after because of having a blood clot and being put on Coumadin. I was an alcoholic but not really bad then and had no real withdrawals. I felt so good and all my heartburn went away so I decided that I would not go back to drinking but would enjoy nursing a snifter of B&B once or twice a week. That not only did not last but doubled my drinking by the following week. Abstaining for meds and becoming sober for life are two entirely different things. I was just above my bottom back then, 9 years ago.