I lost it again
Memberado
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Europe
Posts: 287
I lost it again
AVRT worked like a charm for me for almost three weeks. I did the crash course and for the first time I thought everything had really fallen into place for me.
"It's not me that wants a drink, it's the beast." Totally worked for me.
Then once again I couldnt suddenly resist the temptation anymore. Drank without eating... I kind of knew it was going to hell. And ended up having argument of the year with my family.
I think a big part of it is that I have given up on my life. There are too many problems that I have chosen not to deal with. Problems I can't face, that are rearing their ugly heads in the shape of bouts of rage directed at everyone around me.
So, I fell off the wagon again.
"It's not me that wants a drink, it's the beast." Totally worked for me.
Then once again I couldnt suddenly resist the temptation anymore. Drank without eating... I kind of knew it was going to hell. And ended up having argument of the year with my family.
I think a big part of it is that I have given up on my life. There are too many problems that I have chosen not to deal with. Problems I can't face, that are rearing their ugly heads in the shape of bouts of rage directed at everyone around me.
So, I fell off the wagon again.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,514
I agree that early recovery is a really tough time, because you do have to look at all the messes in your life and fully deal with the problems that your drinking has caused. I found it overwhelming too. I also felt a lot of anger and rage in the first weeks too, which I realize was directed at myself. How could I have let this happen?
The only thing to do is to get through what you can each day and then do more the next day. You can't fix all the problems at once, so prioritize and do what you can.
The only thing to do is to get through what you can each day and then do more the next day. You can't fix all the problems at once, so prioritize and do what you can.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
Thats great advice from Anna DB....welcome back 
I had a lot of problems too, I lot of underlying issues I needed to face...
not one of them could be fixed over night...they took time, they took effort, they took courage and they took patience.
The one thing I had to do, though, while I was dealing with all that was take drinking off the table as a viable option.
I had to turn my back on drinking.
I had to find other tools, other supports, other solutions.
Sometimes that was rough - damn rough - but, to borrow an old cliche...it didn't kill me, and it did in fact make me stronger.
It was worth it
If you're having trouble with implementing AVRT I recommend you visit the Secular Connections forum and check out the AVRT threads down there if you haven't already done so
D
I had a lot of problems too, I lot of underlying issues I needed to face...
not one of them could be fixed over night...they took time, they took effort, they took courage and they took patience.
The one thing I had to do, though, while I was dealing with all that was take drinking off the table as a viable option.
I had to turn my back on drinking.
I had to find other tools, other supports, other solutions.
Sometimes that was rough - damn rough - but, to borrow an old cliche...it didn't kill me, and it did in fact make me stronger.
It was worth it
If you're having trouble with implementing AVRT I recommend you visit the Secular Connections forum and check out the AVRT threads down there if you haven't already done so
D
Memberado
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Europe
Posts: 287
Originally Posted by Dee74 
Thats great advice from Anna DB....welcome back
I had a lot of problems too, I lot of underlying issues I needed to face...
not one of them could be fixed over night...they took time, they took effort, they took courage and they took patience.
The one thing I had to do, though, while I was dealing with all that was take drinking off the table as a viable option.
I had to turn my back on drinking.
I had to find other tools, other supports, other solutions.
Sometimes that was rough - damn rough - but, to borrow an old cliche...it didn't kill me, and it did in fact make me stronger.
It was worth it
If you're having trouble with implementing AVRT I recommend you visit the Secular Connections forum and check out the AVRT threads down there if you haven't already done so
D
I had a lot of problems too, I lot of underlying issues I needed to face...
not one of them could be fixed over night...they took time, they took effort, they took courage and they took patience.
The one thing I had to do, though, while I was dealing with all that was take drinking off the table as a viable option.
I had to turn my back on drinking.
I had to find other tools, other supports, other solutions.
Sometimes that was rough - damn rough - but, to borrow an old cliche...it didn't kill me, and it did in fact make me stronger.
It was worth it
If you're having trouble with implementing AVRT I recommend you visit the Secular Connections forum and check out the AVRT threads down there if you haven't already done so
D
First, I am a bit embarrassed about this happening over and over. But I figure sharing about it is better than stopping to look for support. Thanks to all who take the time and effort to give me feedback. I appreciate it and I do try to make this work.
I have the contact info of a great doctor (or so Ive heard) so now I will try and get medical help for this. I cant do it by myself. I realize that after all these failed attempts.
Re-Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Colorado Springs, Colorado
Posts: 7,583
Good choices. I too had to have lots of help. In hospital detox, several Docs and counselors, my family and friends, AA for my first three months and SR from the first week on. Some people do better face to face with meetings and counseling. Others do well alone with just SR, and everywhere in between. You are trying mire and differentvwhen one alone does not work for you. That is how I got by. I tried it all and took what I could use from each and left the rest. You are heading in the right direction for your eventual recovery. If you want it badly enough you will recover. I did and there are few that drank as much as I did with little effect from tolerance to it.
You likely don't have any more or any less problems than the rest of us do/did. That only became apparent to me after I had been sober for a year and could read here from that perspective, that of others not all about me. It takes longer than a month or two to start seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. Take hope from our energy and strength and truths we share. They are here to hear, we've been there too.
You likely don't have any more or any less problems than the rest of us do/did. That only became apparent to me after I had been sober for a year and could read here from that perspective, that of others not all about me. It takes longer than a month or two to start seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. Take hope from our energy and strength and truths we share. They are here to hear, we've been there too.
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