heartandsoul

He calls and says "I'm hanging out with a friend tonight, I say "don't get in any trouble", he says "don't worry I won't, I love you". Its midnight, I just got done with a five hour drive and I call to let him know I made it safe. "hey baby I'm so f****ing happy, I f****ing love you" he's drunk. some friends bought him a few drinks, then he decided to get "totally plastered" how many times now had he told me he wants to quit, that he doesn't even enjoy drinking? Enough that I don't believe him anymore. Enough that I know he's not ready to quit. I told him that I was to tired to deal with a drunk conversation, so just send me a text when you get home. He called me anyway. he told me he loved me over and over, he begged me not to leave him, he called himself every name in the book, he told me he's not happy with the person he sees in the mirror, he told me nothing is more important than us. It went on for over an hour. I said angry words, I called him out on lies and excuses, I told him that I love him. I hate this. I hate that there is something that can tear us apart like this, I hate not being able to trust him. I hate lying here awake, crying and typing this, the words of our conversation going through my head, when he's probably passed out and won't remember it tomorrow. I don't know what to do.

Charon

Just hang up!

hello-kitty

Here's a good boundary that you can enforce the next time this happens (should YOU choose to stay in a relationship with an alcoholic/addict):

I will not listen or participate in the lunatic ravings of someone who is drunk or high. I will hang up and turn off my phone. If you show up at my house and continue to disturb my peace, I will call the police and have you removed.

lightseeker

I wonder if you changed your perspective from "don't call me when you're drunk" to "I won't talk to people when they are drunk" if you would have more success at avoiding the situation all together.

Step 1: I am powerless over alcholol

....that means that your only option is to step aside of it and not engage. Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. What could you do differently?

dollydo

Don't answer the phone or turn it off.

crazybabie

I understand the feeling your having and I feel the same about my husband and his drugs with that said We are the only ones who can do anything about it they have shown us who they are when will you start believing it?

Is it easy no I have messed up over and over but I dusted myself off and am moving on.
Do you attend any meetings or anything for you?