My Story
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Bennington, KS
Posts: 5
My Story
This is my story. I posted this on my Facebook page on Sept. 13, 2012. I was hoping if I told the world and had to be accountable to them, I could learn to be accountable to myself. As of 11:30 CST today, I will have 36 hours free from smoking. I am still having cravings, but knowing so many people have hope for me helps keep me from picking one up. Thanks for giving me another place to share.
My name is Kristina. I am a real person, many of you know me or my children.
I have a habit. I stink. My hair, my clothes, my breath.
My habit has literally broken my heart and lungs, and devasted my body directly and indirectly.
My habit costs me around $200.00 per month, and an estimated 90 minutes of my time everyday.
My habit costs me around 10 hours a month having lab tests ran and waiting to see doctors. I cannot even keep track of how much time I have spent hospitalized.
I have to take 10 prescription medication each day due to the effects on my body.
I have to give myself 60 shots a month in my stomache, and I get 12 more a month from a Dr. That's 72 SHOTS A MONTH!
My average cost of medication is around $350.00-$400.00s per month out of pocket-that means my health insurance doesn't pay that amount and it comes out of my pocket.
I have been permantley disabled and unable to work since February of 2006. I receive a little over $900 per month in Social Security disablitliy. I don't make enough money or feel well enough to enjoy NOT working. It is NOT fun.
I have lied to my doctors, husband, children, family and friends about my habit, and I consider myself to be an honest person.
I started my habit in my early teens and have now been addicted for 22+ years.
The consequences to my health did not occur for nearly 17 years! They built over time and where INSIDIOUS!
In 2006 I nearly DIED from having 2 blood clots in my lungs. I suffered massive hemorrghage to my lungs (I was drowning in my own blood), my right lung collapsed and I went into right side heart failure.
I have undergone 3 skin biopsies, 3 bone marrow biopsies, and a kidney biopsy. I was scheduled for a lung biopsy, but wasn't able to have it done because I suffered a small stroke on Aug. 23, 2012. It is waiting to be rescheduled.
I am missing all of my upper teeth the left side of my mouth, one on the top right, and several lower back teeth.
I need partials or replacements, but that will cost around $5000.00 to fix. It makes it hard to eat my favorite foods, and is often painful, not to mention very embarrassing.
I started my habit at such a young age that I have never learned positive coping skills to deal with stress.
I have a 4 year old son that I very likely will not live to see graduate from high school due to the health issues my habit has caused me. That's in only 14 short years. I may not live to see my oldest son marry.
I may seem old to many of you, but I am not. I just turned 38 on September 1st.
My quit date is tomorrow, Friday September 14th. I have to do it, but do you have any idea how many times I have said that? At what price will enough be enough, because I thought surely I would quit after a single one of the events I have lived through.
I hope if you are young and smoke or thinking of smoking you QUIT NOW and better yet, don't EVER start. You've seen the people on T.V. in the anti-smoking ads? I don't know if they are actors, but the stories are all truth. Don't believe me? Ask my son Zach, my husband, or anyone of the 6 doctors I see on a regular basis. It's easy to ignore when it's someone you don't know~well know you DO know someone and things just got REAL!
Kristina
"Perhaps it is in times of being hopeless that we desperately need to borrow hope from someone else…"
My name is Kristina. I am a real person, many of you know me or my children.
I have a habit. I stink. My hair, my clothes, my breath.
My habit has literally broken my heart and lungs, and devasted my body directly and indirectly.
My habit costs me around $200.00 per month, and an estimated 90 minutes of my time everyday.
My habit costs me around 10 hours a month having lab tests ran and waiting to see doctors. I cannot even keep track of how much time I have spent hospitalized.
I have to take 10 prescription medication each day due to the effects on my body.
I have to give myself 60 shots a month in my stomache, and I get 12 more a month from a Dr. That's 72 SHOTS A MONTH!
My average cost of medication is around $350.00-$400.00s per month out of pocket-that means my health insurance doesn't pay that amount and it comes out of my pocket.
I have been permantley disabled and unable to work since February of 2006. I receive a little over $900 per month in Social Security disablitliy. I don't make enough money or feel well enough to enjoy NOT working. It is NOT fun.
I have lied to my doctors, husband, children, family and friends about my habit, and I consider myself to be an honest person.
I started my habit in my early teens and have now been addicted for 22+ years.
The consequences to my health did not occur for nearly 17 years! They built over time and where INSIDIOUS!
In 2006 I nearly DIED from having 2 blood clots in my lungs. I suffered massive hemorrghage to my lungs (I was drowning in my own blood), my right lung collapsed and I went into right side heart failure.
I have undergone 3 skin biopsies, 3 bone marrow biopsies, and a kidney biopsy. I was scheduled for a lung biopsy, but wasn't able to have it done because I suffered a small stroke on Aug. 23, 2012. It is waiting to be rescheduled.
I am missing all of my upper teeth the left side of my mouth, one on the top right, and several lower back teeth.
I need partials or replacements, but that will cost around $5000.00 to fix. It makes it hard to eat my favorite foods, and is often painful, not to mention very embarrassing.
I started my habit at such a young age that I have never learned positive coping skills to deal with stress.
I have a 4 year old son that I very likely will not live to see graduate from high school due to the health issues my habit has caused me. That's in only 14 short years. I may not live to see my oldest son marry.
I may seem old to many of you, but I am not. I just turned 38 on September 1st.
My quit date is tomorrow, Friday September 14th. I have to do it, but do you have any idea how many times I have said that? At what price will enough be enough, because I thought surely I would quit after a single one of the events I have lived through.
I hope if you are young and smoke or thinking of smoking you QUIT NOW and better yet, don't EVER start. You've seen the people on T.V. in the anti-smoking ads? I don't know if they are actors, but the stories are all truth. Don't believe me? Ask my son Zach, my husband, or anyone of the 6 doctors I see on a regular basis. It's easy to ignore when it's someone you don't know~well know you DO know someone and things just got REAL!
Kristina
"Perhaps it is in times of being hopeless that we desperately need to borrow hope from someone else…"
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 2,937
Flipping heck!
I am nearly four years without a cigarette and never looked back.
This time, I think I cracked it. I can hand on heart say I have never cheated once - not a single puff on a cigarette.
I am the same age as you - 38 years old.
My younger sister still smokes and it makes me so sad.
She has asthma too.
She is desperate to have a baby and taking fertility treatment but still smoking, heavily smoking.
I think she is deluding herself.
I sincerly hope you manage to stop and your health improves.
Make your kids proud of you!
Much love
S
xxxx
I am nearly four years without a cigarette and never looked back.
This time, I think I cracked it. I can hand on heart say I have never cheated once - not a single puff on a cigarette.
I am the same age as you - 38 years old.
My younger sister still smokes and it makes me so sad.
She has asthma too.
She is desperate to have a baby and taking fertility treatment but still smoking, heavily smoking.
I think she is deluding herself.
I sincerly hope you manage to stop and your health improves.
Make your kids proud of you!
Much love
S
xxxx
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Bennington, KS
Posts: 5
Update
Tomorrow will be day 7 of freedom!
Sasha, you are probably right about your sister~smoking will effect her chances to get pregnant, and if she can't quit while she is pregnant, may do harm to her baby. But I know it is easy to deny, deny, deny until you are ready to accept and change behavior. I hope she finds the strength to quit. For me it was getting to a point of being sick of being sick and tired, and knowing all I had to do was make a decesion one time to not light up. Once I said no to myself, it was easier to say no the second time. It took me about a month of trying to make it one day without smoking. After that first day, I decided I never wanted to put myself through that again, and every time I have a craving I remember that. Good luck to her, stay on her about it, you never know when she will finally hear what you are saying!
Sasha, you are probably right about your sister~smoking will effect her chances to get pregnant, and if she can't quit while she is pregnant, may do harm to her baby. But I know it is easy to deny, deny, deny until you are ready to accept and change behavior. I hope she finds the strength to quit. For me it was getting to a point of being sick of being sick and tired, and knowing all I had to do was make a decesion one time to not light up. Once I said no to myself, it was easier to say no the second time. It took me about a month of trying to make it one day without smoking. After that first day, I decided I never wanted to put myself through that again, and every time I have a craving I remember that. Good luck to her, stay on her about it, you never know when she will finally hear what you are saying!
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