Pondlady

That's what I feel like I'm walking into tomorrow. I'm taking a vacation and will be spending time with family. I have two sisters who harbor resentment and jealousy....the one pretty much confirmed that to me this morning. I felt stung when she said this to me. I told my husband (was close to tears) that a couple of months ago, I would have coped with this by opening a bottle of wine......thinking early afternoon was at least after lunch!!! Instead I made myself a P.B & J sandwich with a glass of milk, folded laundry and started packing.

I am upset and nervous. Giving thought to how to decompress if needed over the next 10 days. Thanks for listening.

hypochondriac

I really feel for you Kim. Have you got any coping strategies to help you through? (An escape plan is always first on my list!). Does your family know you have quit drinking? x

Anna

That sounds like a difficult situation to be going into to. Are you able to spend time away from your sisters on this vacation, going out for a walk or shopping on your own?

Pondlady

Thankfully I will only be with my sisters a couple of nights. I've been thinking of possible things they will say / do, so I don't react. It is not worth it to get into it with them, and won't change anything. My parents know I quit drinking. One of my sisters doesn't drink and the other drinks rarely. I am going to take the high road , stick to civil remarks and excuse myself with a headache for an early bedtime, if I need to. Thanks for the support and ideas

Fandy

if you can, treat yourself to a Kindle or Nook tablet with little headphones...download LOTS of apps books and plug into free wi-fi...you can pretend you are learning a new language and say all kinds of things (no one will know what you really mean)..besides it will give you something to do when you excuse yourself

Dee74

It's great to have a plan Kim - and remember you have the community here at your back

I hope things turn out better than you fear

D

Pondlady

Me too! I'll be running for my lap top to post / read on SR Thanks guys!

Pondlady

Well, we've arrived at the first let of our vacation. We were planning a dual birthday party for my sister and me. She said she didn't feel well enough to attend. We took pictures of the cake to send to her, and sent several thick slices to her home. My other sister seemed a bit tense with me, but it dissipated, and we enjoyed a pleasant visit. This evening turned out better than it could have.

I was not tempted to drink, but did have a jolt when I saw the wine bottles chilling in the frig. Stuck with diet tonic and lime and was fine.

freshstart57

Good for you, Pondlady. Keeping it steady, I see. All this drama can rise up and blow away as you know it will in the end, and you will remain. Solid, sober and serene.

Pondlady

Solid, sober and serene...I like it Arrived at our vacation destination this afternoon....beautiful Lake Michigan. I've got books to read, a scarf to finish knitting , walks to enjoy and time with my parents.

So far, so good.....keeping mindful though.

artsoul

Sounds good Pondlady!

I took up knitting again when I got sober - I find it meditative. (Being the good addict that I am, though, I went a little overboard and ended up making afghans for my 3 kids for Christmas last year).

Glad things are working out so far...... Staying in the moment helps me a lot. Sometimes I even make a game out of it by stopping every once in a while and finding something to appreciate.... the color of the sky, whatever.... just little things, but it gives me a break from all the stuff I usually think about.

Hope you get a chance to really relax and enjoy your vacation (I went to college on Lake Michigan, so I can see you there in my mind's eye!).

NoFireWater

Kim, I'm so glad it went better than you had expected! I think your attitude helped a lot. Happy Birthday and enjoy the vacation! If your sisters start anything just try to walk away and do something calming...

Pondlady

The lake is gorgeous this morning!!!! Bought homemade donuts to enjoy with morning coffee.....the donuts were still warm Knitted for a little while this morning....if I do some each day, I should finish it this week! I brought four books and am determined to read one of them! Looking forward to a long walk today through the woods and along the shore.

Artsoul, Where did you attend college? I'm a Spartan - class of 79

Pondlady

Well my vacation is over. I only saw my one sister The other one said she wasn't feeling well. She also has not returned my calls or e-mails. I realize she has deep seeded resentments. I've decided to not let them keep me from visiting my parents. I'm sorry she feels so jealous and threatened....but her feelings / behavior, is beyond my control. I love her, always will...and will continue to reach out to her....but will not feel intimidated anymore.

BTW - enjoyed a beautiful sunset over Lake Michigan every night....another benefit of being sober Peace!

Anna

It sounds like the vacation was a positive experience, Pondlady and I'm really glad you enjoyed yourself.

artsoul

I'm sorry you didn't get to see your sister, but it sounds like you're looking at things realistically. Hopefully, she'll come around in time. Good job on staying sober through it all!
I went to Hope College (in Holland), class of 74..... A Spartan huh? Cool....You went to the BIG college.

Pondlady

Artsoul,

Attended Albion my freshman year