Well go freaking figure!
A simple guy making his way
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Maine
Posts: 7,867
Well go freaking figure!
It's Friday.
No matter I had a horrible relapse midweek.
No matter I decided to quit.
No matter i have plans for dinner.
No matter what ever the he!! I want to do......
My AV is lurking.
Go freakin figure!
There is no chance I will drink this weekend. That has already been decided. Monday is way to far away to be thinking about that.
But the constant chatter is really becoming annoying!
For those that dont know me my AV is Guido.
I know many here might be experiencing the very same thing on Friday afternoons.
My heart is beating quicker. My mind is racing about the possibilities.
Ha ha! Possibilities?
I will replace those possibilities with going to the beach....downloading A new book...trying to stay cool in this heat wave.
What Guido does not know is that I am not alone anymore. I have at my disposal an army waiting to squash any attempts to take control.
That army is you!
I can handle this weekend. I am determined. If I need back up I learned in a very very big way this week.....that all I need to do is ask for help.
And if anyone need help I will be here for you!
Have a great sober weekend everyone!
No matter I had a horrible relapse midweek.
No matter I decided to quit.
No matter i have plans for dinner.
No matter what ever the he!! I want to do......
My AV is lurking.
Go freakin figure!
There is no chance I will drink this weekend. That has already been decided. Monday is way to far away to be thinking about that.
But the constant chatter is really becoming annoying!
For those that dont know me my AV is Guido.
I know many here might be experiencing the very same thing on Friday afternoons.
My heart is beating quicker. My mind is racing about the possibilities.
Ha ha! Possibilities?
I will replace those possibilities with going to the beach....downloading A new book...trying to stay cool in this heat wave.
What Guido does not know is that I am not alone anymore. I have at my disposal an army waiting to squash any attempts to take control.
That army is you!
I can handle this weekend. I am determined. If I need back up I learned in a very very big way this week.....that all I need to do is ask for help.
And if anyone need help I will be here for you!
Have a great sober weekend everyone!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Alaska
Posts: 1,458
LOL I imagine my AV is like a little monkey with a pretty loud voice. That voice is kind of hoarse now a days though as it's starting to learn that we're NOT BFF's anymore. LOL Love this post of yours!!!
Belgian Sheepdog Adictee
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: In Today
Posts: 6,101
(((((Weasel)))))
One voice? Just one voice?
I am laughing but not at you, at remembering. I had a whole frigging committee up there, at a big table in the boardroom and King Alcohol was chairing the meeting. It was all 'crosstalk' and damn it was so noisy in my head. I was living in the San Fernando Valley when I got sober and I would drive out one of the Canyons, like Topanga Canyon, then off into one of the side canyons. Park my car, get out and climb up the rocks and just SCREAM at them to friggin shut up. The meeting was adjourned. They were on vacation. Go away. and on and on and on.
With all the voices I was hearing, I seriously should have been locked up in a padded cell in a straight jacket. They were REAL.
Just as REAL as that AV is for you (I'm not laughing now and never was at you, just at me).
Now even today, many many years later, all lived in recovery, if I am in a dark place, totally stressed out they will try to convene a meeting. However, with all the tools I have today, it is very easy to get them to shut up and go back on hiatus.
Stand in the middle of the room, or if in vehicle make sure all windows are rolled up, roflmao (you wouldn't want your fellow drivers to see how crazy you are right now) and in a very firm, LOUD, voice tell your AV he/she is fired, but as part of his/her firing package you are sending him/her on a long vacation to the South Seas, now GO.
Then do something nice for yourself. Continue to work on you, find the tools for living sober and start to apply them on a daily basis, and you will see that your AV appears less and less.
This is taking you back. You can do this, I know you can, and so do you!!!
Love and hugs,
One voice? Just one voice?
I am laughing but not at you, at remembering. I had a whole frigging committee up there, at a big table in the boardroom and King Alcohol was chairing the meeting. It was all 'crosstalk' and damn it was so noisy in my head. I was living in the San Fernando Valley when I got sober and I would drive out one of the Canyons, like Topanga Canyon, then off into one of the side canyons. Park my car, get out and climb up the rocks and just SCREAM at them to friggin shut up. The meeting was adjourned. They were on vacation. Go away. and on and on and on.
With all the voices I was hearing, I seriously should have been locked up in a padded cell in a straight jacket. They were REAL.
Just as REAL as that AV is for you (I'm not laughing now and never was at you, just at me).
Now even today, many many years later, all lived in recovery, if I am in a dark place, totally stressed out they will try to convene a meeting. However, with all the tools I have today, it is very easy to get them to shut up and go back on hiatus.
Stand in the middle of the room, or if in vehicle make sure all windows are rolled up, roflmao (you wouldn't want your fellow drivers to see how crazy you are right now) and in a very firm, LOUD, voice tell your AV he/she is fired, but as part of his/her firing package you are sending him/her on a long vacation to the South Seas, now GO.
Then do something nice for yourself. Continue to work on you, find the tools for living sober and start to apply them on a daily basis, and you will see that your AV appears less and less.
This is taking you back. You can do this, I know you can, and so do you!!!
Love and hugs,
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
Ken, there is a ton of support here for you as you know. Don't forget to give the Secular Connections forum a try too, help is all over the place around here! I have confidence in you, and a good feeling about this. Stay in touch.
Crazy Cat Lady
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 2,661
I went to a concert last night (Foo Fighters at Summerfest here in Milwaukee) and the smell of alcohol triggered me pretty hard. I wasn't so tempted that i was miserable or concerned about my sobriety but i had a hard time getting longterm sobriety off my mind which is very unusual for me. I kept thinking "i don't want to never drink again. It's too much! I can't handle it!" So i decided that for all i knew, maybe i would drink tomorrow. I just wasn't going to do it today. I say that all the time but i really did mean it this time. I knew that there was a possibility that come tomorrow, i could be drinking. It lifted the stress, let me live in the present and let me enjoy myself. Today i feel good enough to contemplate longer term sobriety so that's fine. I'm just glad i was able to let myself live one day at a time yesterday.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: London, England
Posts: 724
Yes, that voice (I call mine Catherine) is annoying. I'm getting to the point where I just tell her to STFU rather than argue with her.
Fortunately I had a meeting this evening. I've got one tomorrow morning, and another tomorrow evening. And on Sunday evening. That helps a lot. I always come back from a meeting feeling more positive.
Have a good weekend Weasel. Be strong. Be sober. And tell Guido that we'll come and kick his arse if he starts on at you.
Fortunately I had a meeting this evening. I've got one tomorrow morning, and another tomorrow evening. And on Sunday evening. That helps a lot. I always come back from a meeting feeling more positive.
Have a good weekend Weasel. Be strong. Be sober. And tell Guido that we'll come and kick his arse if he starts on at you.
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