beatcat22

I am not in the slightest bit interested in 12-step programs. I consider them
a con game, a cult and at best they merely substitute one type of stupid
addiction with another.

I am extremely poor. I live on Social Security Disablity and am extremely
physically dependent on alcohol, drinking daily for the past 5 years, at least a six pack of beer a day, often more.

I suffer from Borderline Personality Disorder, and have had a good deal of
trauma in my life. I was molested as a child, and I spent five years in prison.

I live in Washington DC, and the so-called support system here is a joke, a fraud. I despise all government hacks who do nothing but push paper and make excuses.

I am agnostic, and extremely suspicious of superstitious people (aka as religious or spiritual. That whole vibe creeps me out the the max.

What I am looking for is a residential program where I can bring my own supply of beer, and they will dole it out to me each day, in decreasing amounts, so that I can taper off.

I think medication is utter ********. I've rarely had any sort of medicine that
was effective, and dozens of antidepressants, mood stabilizers, antipsychotics and other crap that was useless. I am very skeptical. I tried Campral on my own a few years ago, and it did NOTHING to abate my craving for alcohol.

I am very suspicious of hospitals, especially ones that stand to make a profit
by telling you to "Keep Coming Back" and "You're Powerless" and "You Have a Lifelong Disease and there is No Cure" and "You Will Relapse" and "You Are Responsible, but You Are Simultaneously Incompetent to Judge".
That's all a scam, and I want no part of it, ever.

I am VERY sensitive to being told what to do. I feel threatened, bullied, attacked or criticized VERY easily. Five years in prison, remember.
So, I need a staff that is OBSEQUIOUSLY POLITE. Most medical and government types I have encountered in life have been unspeakably rude, lazy, incompetent and abusive.

I have no money, and only Medicare for insurance. Is there a clinic in the
Washington DC area that will taper me off alcohol as I described above, has staff that are not goons, hacks, bullies, idiot/religious freaks, etc AND will take my insurance?

24hrsAday

Welcome beatcat! i don't think you have to work the 12 steps and or be in A.A. or anything to get sober.

loudog430

I have no idea if that type of treatment exists. I don't know if there is much help out there if your stand to reject most of the existing help. Sorry if I sound like a typical "goon" you run into, but there is only so much other people can do to help you. I have not lived the same life you have, and I am trying to judge, but there people who have gone through the same experiences you have, if not worse, that are helping others and taking the big steps. It all comes down to choice [easier said than done]. Good luck Beatcat.

beatcat22

Responses like,

"my experience was different from yours"

"oh, I can top that, I know people worse off than you"

"you're wrong because _____"

"what you need doesn't exist"

"you just need to accept the useless status quo horseshit,
grow up, suck it up, quit complaining"

"I don't know"

Are a massive waste of your time and mine, not to mention a waste of bandwidth. My life sucks badly enough without being enraged by such stupidity. Thank you.

loudog430

I just hope you find the help you are looking for beatcat. Insulting people you are asking help from won't get you too far, yet we are still here to help anyway. Perhaps contacting an AA group within DC metro and ask if they have any knowledge of such a program will grant you an answer.

GirlFromCO

I really doubt it. The good news is that most people get sober without going to a treatment program, and plenty of people get sober without AA - myself included. You could make it happen today if you chose to and you wouldn't even have to worry about insurance.

Purplecatlover

There is book called Rational Recovery by Jack Trimpey that is not about steps. His views of AA are similar to yours. You can order a used copy off Amazon for less than 1 night of beer.
It has worked for alot of people who are not fond of AA. No meetings, no higher powers, no interference from anyone. It teaches Addictive Voice Recognition Technique ( AVRT)
There is a thread about it under secular connections, scroll down from newcomers on main page.
You can google AVRT in a nutshell for a free crash course.

Zencat

to the forums of SoberRecovery Beatcat.

If you cant find what your looking for as a treatment center or place of assistance, continued participation here at SR can be helpful. The Secular Connections forum here at SR is a 12-step free zone. You'll get more of the type of support your looking for there.

I'm on limited funds too (SSDI), have a dual-disorder and am atheistic. Yet I am able to make good use of my community resources. Even the ones that use spooky magical systems as a main focus of their treatment modality. I think you'll have an extremely hard time getting the help you need under the conditions you require.

There are addiction treatment plans of a secular nature that would suit you well as an agnostic person. LifeRing fits me well as there is no one recovery program the is appropriate for everybody. Below are some links that may be of use to you, check them out or not.
Hope I was able to help.

hypochondriac

Could you not get a friend or family member to do this for you?

It is a distinct possibility that any kind of detox facility might contain someone who might be offensive to you.

I don't think you should accept the status quo. Hell, make your own recovery method up if none of the others work for you.

Best of luck to you x

Sapling

I hope you find what you're looking for.

beatcat22

Does it really seem likely to you that I have any friends?
Or that my family is the supportive type?

I agree, if this does not yet exist, it should. I suspect, like most worthwhile things, the lawyers prevent it from working. "Give alcohol to drunks!?? Think of the LIABILITY!!"

All lawyers and doctors deserve to be set on fire.

jwaco

what are you're thoughts on a higher power?

Sapling

You talk about how poor you are and how everything is screwed up but you...Where do you get your money to drink?....I know beer isn't cheap.

hypochondriac

If I lived closer I would come and do it for you myself x

What are you going to do after you've stopped drinking? I do believe that the physical dependence may be the tip of the iceberg x

soberlicious

Beatcat I would also recommend AVRT but it does not involve tapering. Do a medical detox first then read. You can quit if you so desire.

beatcat22

I am living on my insurance. Social Security Disability, funded from the decades I worked and paid into the system. Beer IS cheap, if you buy stuff like Steel Reserve, and if you have few other luxuries. I do not own a car, never go out to eat or to the movies, no social life whatsoever, dress in clothes from thrift shops, sleep on a mattress I found in the trash. Apartment is subsidized, otherwise I'd be homeless/dead.

beatcat22

Medical detox? I've already expressed my extreme skepticism about drugs such as Campral.

I have ZERO belief that I would be treated with anything even remotely
approaching the level of deference I would require. Medical professionals, security guards, cops, social service workers...these types of hacks/quacks have NO INCENTIVE to actually do their jobs or produce RESULTS, much less treat the customer with RESPECT.

They either do not care or do not understand....or, if they do understand, it's all "suck it up, be a man, grow up, it's not that bad, I know people worse off than you."
**** THAT TO DEATH.

beatcat22

That's a kind thing to say, thanks.

After the alcohol is out of my system, I will very reluctantly once again start trying to use psychiatric drugs to help control my Borderline Personality Disorder. You gotta realize, I seriously think that my way of looking at the world is the sane one, and it is "all you" who are the insane ones. Every once in a while I realize I've wildly over-reacted (again) and have to admit that something is broken, but that changes nothing.

beatcat22

Is that a joke?

Mark75

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy has shown some success with Borderline Personality Disorder and Addiction.