zorah

I got a sponsor, am going to meetings, and am already feeling trapped like a caged animal. I had get a sponsor fast because I can't stop drinking, have bipolar and the combo of booze and BP is deadly. So I'm off to the races and want to jump the fence already. Booze brain telling me that I've imagined my problem and I really don't need support. the restlessness is a kicker. aaaaaarrrrrrrggggghhhh!

my sponsor wants me to go to one meeting she attends and she goes to those huge speaker meetings that seem more like revivalist services where everyone's testifying and cheering for the Lord. i am incredibly reclusive, a true loner.... At this point, I guess I'll just hold my nose over that one meeting because this woman has 20 years in AA and is very supportive.

thanks for listening.....

Zorah

Taking5

I've been in AA a long time, I live in the bible belt, an no AA meeting I've ever been to remotely resembles what you described.

Great job in deciding to go despite your misgivings. Please post back and let us know how it went.

2granddaughters

Go to the meetings to hear what the oldtimers are saying .....

Keep going until what you heard them say makes sense.



If you want what the oldtimers have, you have to do what the oldtimers did.

All the best.

Bob R

sugarbear1

Ever hear of the Set Aside Prayer? Here it is:

Dear God, Let me set aside everything I think I know about you, about me, about this way of life, and about these steps, for an open mind and a new experience of you, of me, of this way of life and of these steps. Amen

It might help to say this before going to that meeting.

CaiHong

Hi Zorah
Hang in there. Do whatever it takes. AA is the program not the meetings, the meetings are there for support.

I find I get a lot of support from this forum, haven't been to a meeting for ages think I will go to one on Thursday need to talk to people I can relate to.

CaiHong

NYCDoglvr

You sound like me in early sobriety.

Feelings aren't facts.

You don't have to drink.

Feelings pass.

UpperbucksAAguy

AA isn't the meetings we make it is the steps we take.

CarolD

I sure felt trapped by alcohol....so I went to all sorts of meetings
to meet those who were sucessfully sober

I suggest you get busy with Step work....that is why you have a sponsor.
The Steps gave me a fantastic new life....

muvinon

I wanted to not drink. Period. So one thing I did that helped me alot? I made a decision I didn't give a dang how I felt. I just did it. ANYTHING but drink. Ignoring my opinions and feelings worked very well, not that I didn't have them, of course.

But frankly, who cares? The way I was living was far, far worse.