Esmerelda

I wrote this post (which I've now slightly edited) in response to someone's sharing about their taper which I found through a google search. the Moderator suggested I might find this forum helpful too so I figured I'd be a little brave and start my own thread.... I am 39 and have been on opiates for pain management directly prior to and after back surgery (and the complications that came with it) for around 7 years. I began a slow taper in early November and wanted to post about it because I didn't find many success stories when I looked for them early on. Of course I am not totally successful YET as I'm still tapering but...when I began the weaning process I was at around 150mg a day (20mg 4x a day & 60 mg oxycontin at night plus usually an extra ten oxycodone for breakthrough at some point in the day.) As of this writing I am down to about 38mg altogether a day. It has NOT been easy. But, it's been doable. In the beginning I took tizanidine (which I never see mentioned anywhere) to help with the leg cramping and it did help but made me extremely sleepy and dizzy and gave me horrible dry mouth. I also was having terrible insomnia (despite that sleepiness) and would wake up every couple of hours and stay awake for sometimes 1 to 3 hours at a time. It was like having a newborn except the baby was me. At some point, fairly recently in the tapering process, I feel like I crossed a threshold and it got a lot easier. I would say I am now in LESS pain that I was when I was on 3x the amount of opiates. My dr. says this could be attributed to Opioid-induced hyperalgesia (which I tried to post a wiki link for but apparently I haven't earned that privilege here yet). I suspect he's right. I can't help but feel deep regret for the amount of my life these pills stole (or that I gave away, depending on how I look at it) in that case, convincing me i needed more and more to manage my very real physical pain all the while actually making me much more sensitive & susceptible TO pain. Anyway, I switched from the tizanidine to flexerill a couple weeks ago and that has helped me a lot--I can finally fall asleep and stay there through the night only waking up once or last night I think maybe not at all. This morning for the first time since I can remember I woke up at 10 something without thinking about needing to take a pill. To me that's a miracle and I'm so grateful. I know that I am not out of the woods and wont be until I am completely off, but I finally have real hope for that becoming a reality sooner rather than later. And I would just urge anyone out there reading this that it CAN be done. I tried once before years ago and couldn't do it, partly because I was working in an office and taking the tizanidine then meant I couldn't really function at my job. This time I had the luxury of being self-employed and because my absolute priority was getting off the meds I bit the bullet and allowed myself to do whatever was reasonably necessary (including staying in bed all day) to keep at it. I absolutely think it's like any addiction ( a word which, while I am honestly not so comfortable with given all the stigma attached to it, I accept is indeed what happened to me with these meds and is what WOULD happen to nearly any one who had stay on them for more than a couple weeks) in that you have to be really truly ready to quit. I would love to hear from anyone with a similar story about what the end stage of their taper felt like, as I, perhaps naively, thought I could avoid the more hardcore symptoms pookie described at the end of hers by coming off so slowly. Thanks and blessings to all of you. This stuff is SO hard and its communities like these, not

Esmerelda

Sorry I didn't quite paste my whole post. the last sentence should have read:

Thanks and blessings to all of you. This stuff is SO hard and its communities like these, not the doctors by in large, that are helping people reclaim their lives.

IvanKatz

That's why we're all here. Doctors have their purpose, and we have ours.

TheReader

Welcome to SR, Esmeralda.
I, too, tapered from opiate pills last December and was successful, but I think only because I knew what I had in my possession was the last I could obtain. I never bought off the streets or doctor shopped, and knew I would never do those things, so the decision was pretty firm for me.

I do believe circumstances have a lot to do with whether one can taper or not. Properly done, the w/d's are easier.
Before this effort, I had quit cold turkey many times, but got right back on the roller coaster as soon as I could acquire more pills.

Regarding end stage of taper, I still had w/d symptoms for about a week, but only bad ones for a few days. For some reason, sneezing, was one that stayed with me, and of course, the trouble sleeping we all seem to experience. The mental trials are the toughest though, as these kick in after the physical w/d's are over and last much longer depending on how long one has been using. I had used some type of opiate pill off and on for close to 20 years. It has now been 13 months and I am in the best place I have been in my life in 20 years!
It can be done and we all here at SR are here to support you. Keep posting.

Esmerelda

Thank you so much, Reader. The understanding and encouragement really helps. I'm single and have very few friends where I'm currently living so I appreciate this online support all the more. Can I ask how long your taper was and from what dosage you came down? When you say you had bad WD symptoms for a few days, what was the last amount of opiates you'd taken before the jump? I am asking because I want to know if I should go reallllllly slowly to the point of not jumping until I am down to a few mg or if there's a point at which I can just naturally stop. If I follow my own thinking (which is in line with my dr's advice, although initially he thought I should do this much faster--now sees its working well and just encourages me to continue) which has worked so far I would drop down to the lowest possible dose before going off completely in the hopes my body will be more forgiving.