tberry

So Im not really sure where to start. My father in law lost his wife of 30 years in july and was already drinking a case of beer a night. When she passed he asked us to move in and we did but hes now drinking more than double what he was before of beer aand liqour to. My husband has started drinking more as well and I feel kinda lost. I dont know what to do anymore. I've begged them to quit but my father in law has been drinking for 30 or more years and my husband is following right behind him. I need really good advice

Seren

Hello tberry, Welcome to SR!!!!

I moved your post to it's own thread because I thought you might receive more support here! Others will be along soon to offer you their Experience, Strength, and Hope (ES&H).

I'm so sorry to hear about your father-in-law and now your husband. Would it be possible to speak to your husband about moving into a place of your own again? Does your father-in-law need live in care or does he just want the company? Perhaps someone could be hired to come and do the cooking and cleaning for him?

One thing that helped my hubby and I tremendously was the face-to-face support we received at Al-Anon meetings. We learned that we could be happy regardless of whether his son was drinking/drugging or not! I hope you will consider going to a few meetings to decide whether or not that type of support works for you.

Welcome, again! Keep reading and posting and asking questions. The "stickies" at the top of each forum contain a world of valuable, basic information.

HG

Willybluedog

Tberry,

Welcome to you, glad you are here, so sorry that you have to be.

As the child of an alcoholic I can tell your first hand, you cannot fix this, you can only take care of you (and if you have kids) them.

Please consider individual and joint counseling as well as al-anon.

You need to learn the tools to deal with this, and especially how to create boundaries.

You have found a great place to come and vent or talk, get a hug or just some propping up.

Please come back and let us know how you are doing.

Thanks,

Bill

Impurrfect

(((Tberry))) - Welcome to SR, though I'm sorry for what has brought you here. When I first found SR, I read through what seemed like a gazillion posts, and realized I really wasn't alone - it's like we're part of a club no one wants to belong to. However, I've learned a lot from the people here, and it's really helped. I know al-anon helps a lot of people, too.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

fedup3

Welcome tberry! I know that sometimes you may feel very alone in this situation but keep posting and know we're here for you.