SaraMichelle

I used to be afraid to tell you that I am an addict, and how much of an addict I really am. I was afraid and ashamed of who I was and I hated myself and so I tried to hate you too. I spent many days and nights feeling so alone and convincing myself that no one loved me or wanted me around. I tried my hardest to make it hard because I was living in fear and shame and I believed I was unworthy of family and happiness. And at a time when it was most crucial, God stepped in and took away my fear. I don’t know what happened but suddenly I could breath, and for months I have wept tears of joy and relief. I wish I could tell you what happened so I can explain but all I can say is God swept down on earth to take the world from my shoulders so I could walk upright again and smile. And now as the fog clears, I look around and realize that you all have loved me, that you have visited me when I was sick. I was unaware of you presence then but as I look back I see that when you wouldn’t help me it was because I wouldn’t let you. So today, I stand up again and say that I am an addict, that I am proud to be an addict because being one has made me strong. My addiction has brought wisdom and pain beyond my years, that I may more clearly see and know and seek truth; That I might better understand true happiness. I am grateful for this mountain that I climb which makes me strong!

Dee74

great post SM - thanks

D

Spica

Way to GO!!!!

Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us - hearing what you have said gives me strength!

lorilou1

Thank U for sharing,
Its true I do not let things in and out, due to isolation and not looking.
it is soo nice to hear u had a spiritual awake., that is so cool!!!!
U are on the right track and wish the best!!!!!!!!
I needed to hear this story, it gives me hope..
God Bless U and Thanks

RubyRose

Thank you SaraMichelle! Your words are powerful. You are an inspiration!

...Ruby...

ryan1983

Amazing post, wish I could feel that sense of relief, good for you