BecomingMe

I was just half listening to the radio and I caught these words from an author being interviewed:

"Alcohol is a poison stronger than our love for our children."

I couldn't tell if they were his words (and didn't catch his name) or a saying or a quote, but they are worth passing on even if I am not sure of the source. A few years ago I thought the arrival of a newborn child would spur my exAH to get himself together. Only now I know better.

TeM

My experience certainly bears that out. Alcohol is the only subject I've seen which can make AW stare at our daughter with outright hostility.

Daughter has tried, in vain, to convince AW to give it up, and AW's attitude is "Get over it".

I've actually overheard AW on the phone with her drinking buddy, badmouthing our daughter as if she were some meddlesome stranger. It was a sad revelation for me.

LifesALongSong

Same here, I can share. My AW would bad mouth me of coarse which was fine. But she would bad mouth my teenage son to high heavens. She had everybody convinced he was the devil child. My son is the most careing person. He does'nt drink or do drugs, no trouble, 3.1 GPA doing advance classes in High School. No complaints from me ! But the AW did'nt see that way. He did care that mom was drinking and they would get into it when I was'nt around. Well, I don't have to worry about that right now because the wife is in sober house for awhile. I doubt if it will work for her.

Yep, I have to agree with that quote. Sad but true.

Thumper

Sad but often true. My xah never bad mouthed the kids but he walked away. He followed alcohol.

I think of the quote below and pray that he finds recovery, and his children.

"The alcoholic parent is not satisfied with his own childhood," Bly says, using the bruised rhetoric of recovery. "He wants yours too... When the father vanishes into alcohol, the son lingers and lingers, searching for a lost part of himself."

TeM

Thanks for that quote. I find much comfort in that philosophy. The past can be littered with regrets, guilt and embarrassment. The future is often too frightening to contemplate.