Down in the Dumps
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: I'm exactly where I should be.
Posts: 1,889
Down in the Dumps
Well, Miss EmeraldRose is feeling alittle beaten this weekend. I'm not looking for the magick spell as much as a lended ear. *smile*
I have been sober for 67(?) days and everything is going great. I always believe that if you don't force life to happen against the grain it will be created for you to follow effortlessly. And it has for the most part...I have had a few curve balls thrown my way and I've managed to keep it together, not panic, not lose (much) sleep.
My ex and I have an amicable aggreement typed and signed by both of the 'rules' of our separation. We decided it was easier and cheaper to not have legal counsel and act like adults. Wale, he has gone against two of the 'rules' which in turn affects me. Like closing the business a week before he left and removing agreed support without a whisper.
I still have some animals I'm trying to find good homes for which is turning into a challenge and a burden.
Since the loss the my job on January 27th I have yet to find another. I was concentrating on my wellness and have successfully done that to where I can be an asset in a working environment. I did apply for two jobs this weekend and need lots of extended prayers that just one calls me!!
I think most can tell from my posts that I am independant, strongwilled and not willing to give up easily. But my feathers are getting worn and I'm tired of treading water. I'm getting tired of wondering in which direction I should head. I'm tired of the battle of knowing at the drop of a hat all bets are off and sobriety could be lost. No, I'm not gonna drink...but we never lose the feeling.
I spent the weekend getting things ready to take to our local consignment shop. I had alot of things to clean and tag and it did feel good eliminating extra baggage. I know I have extra baggage to remove in the form of my ex and I think the sooner I cut the ties the better off I'll be.
Oh and to top it off 'that guy' called this morning again. But I had his name in my contacts so I'd know it was him when he called -and I didn't answer. I really didn't need THAT today, too.
Well, thanks for listening (hug) I can always count on you!
I have been sober for 67(?) days and everything is going great. I always believe that if you don't force life to happen against the grain it will be created for you to follow effortlessly. And it has for the most part...I have had a few curve balls thrown my way and I've managed to keep it together, not panic, not lose (much) sleep.
My ex and I have an amicable aggreement typed and signed by both of the 'rules' of our separation. We decided it was easier and cheaper to not have legal counsel and act like adults. Wale, he has gone against two of the 'rules' which in turn affects me. Like closing the business a week before he left and removing agreed support without a whisper.
I still have some animals I'm trying to find good homes for which is turning into a challenge and a burden.
Since the loss the my job on January 27th I have yet to find another. I was concentrating on my wellness and have successfully done that to where I can be an asset in a working environment. I did apply for two jobs this weekend and need lots of extended prayers that just one calls me!!
I think most can tell from my posts that I am independant, strongwilled and not willing to give up easily. But my feathers are getting worn and I'm tired of treading water. I'm getting tired of wondering in which direction I should head. I'm tired of the battle of knowing at the drop of a hat all bets are off and sobriety could be lost. No, I'm not gonna drink...but we never lose the feeling.
I spent the weekend getting things ready to take to our local consignment shop. I had alot of things to clean and tag and it did feel good eliminating extra baggage. I know I have extra baggage to remove in the form of my ex and I think the sooner I cut the ties the better off I'll be.
Oh and to top it off 'that guy' called this morning again. But I had his name in my contacts so I'd know it was him when he called -and I didn't answer. I really didn't need THAT today, too.
Well, thanks for listening (hug) I can always count on you!
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Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
oh, so much change in such a short period of time....... I would think you are going through some grieving, which is never fun.
I know it may sound cliche, but try to take things one day at a time. Taking the next right step is all any of us can do. Also, the saying Keep It Simple and Easy Does It come to mind. Be your own best friend and cheerleader.
In a sense, you're beginning from scratch with so many things. But, this may be what it takes to get where you really want to be. I know, it's easy to say, but in a sense you're already doing it - you're sober today, you're applying for jobs, you're moving on with your life. That takes guts, my dear - and you don't even sound like you're feeling sorry for yourself - just stressed. And who wouldn't be?
When I was going through a financial crisis after getting sober, I found that practicing gratitude (for enough to eat today, for the health of my children, etc.) helped a great deal. You're going to be OK, but I'm so glad you shared with us. It always helps........ Hang in there!
I know it may sound cliche, but try to take things one day at a time. Taking the next right step is all any of us can do. Also, the saying Keep It Simple and Easy Does It come to mind. Be your own best friend and cheerleader.
In a sense, you're beginning from scratch with so many things. But, this may be what it takes to get where you really want to be. I know, it's easy to say, but in a sense you're already doing it - you're sober today, you're applying for jobs, you're moving on with your life. That takes guts, my dear - and you don't even sound like you're feeling sorry for yourself - just stressed. And who wouldn't be?
When I was going through a financial crisis after getting sober, I found that practicing gratitude (for enough to eat today, for the health of my children, etc.) helped a great deal. You're going to be OK, but I'm so glad you shared with us. It always helps........ Hang in there!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 104
Originally Posted by EmeraldRose 
I think most can tell from my posts that I am independant, strongwilled and not willing to give up easily.
(insert little huggy dudes here)
i've done my almost
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 1,934
Hi ER-
Yeah, one of the "tricks" to sobriety is being ok with ourselves and life in general even when things aren't going "our" way.
What's good for us? How do we really know? Since I've been sober and turned my life over, there has been much that has happend to me, that seemed "bad", but turned out to be awesome (or at least important and needed).
Kjell~
Yeah, one of the "tricks" to sobriety is being ok with ourselves and life in general even when things aren't going "our" way.
What's good for us? How do we really know? Since I've been sober and turned my life over, there has been much that has happend to me, that seemed "bad", but turned out to be awesome (or at least important and needed).
Kjell~
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: I'm exactly where I should be.
Posts: 1,889
Thanx everyone...it is comforting to know you all 'know' what I mean.
Artsoul: It does sound cliche but I do realize I need to take it one day at a time. Things are more productive that way. Great post, thank you.
Thanx nancy for the compliment. Momma always told me if I had nothing nice to say don't say anything. This is a support site and I try to think of others' feelings and situations and relate positive feelings.
And to everyone else...not having family here that I can drive to, sit in their kitchen and have tea and cry, it is nice to know you are there.
Morning started out on a good note: I had called Onstar about my account and was gonna cancel. He not only gave me 3 months free but also 100 minutes of carphone service AND will continue my account at the sale price I have, come August. So that's comforting.
(((Hugs))) to all...let's make this a great sober day!
Artsoul: It does sound cliche but I do realize I need to take it one day at a time. Things are more productive that way. Great post, thank you.
Thanx nancy for the compliment. Momma always told me if I had nothing nice to say don't say anything. This is a support site and I try to think of others' feelings and situations and relate positive feelings.
And to everyone else...not having family here that I can drive to, sit in their kitchen and have tea and cry, it is nice to know you are there.
Morning started out on a good note: I had called Onstar about my account and was gonna cancel. He not only gave me 3 months free but also 100 minutes of carphone service AND will continue my account at the sale price I have, come August. So that's comforting.
(((Hugs))) to all...let's make this a great sober day!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: I'm exactly where I should be.
Posts: 1,889
Thanx everyone. *sigh* We can't all feel perfect all the time. I was feeling overwhelmed. I try to take that bad energy and use it for good -get something done, think positive and get my butt in gear.
A lady who is interested in my hens saw me walking dogs and I went with her to her farm to see her 'stuff'. I'm hopeful she'll take the hens and maybe a few goats she said. They would only be about 2 miles from me so I can see them often. That makes me very happy.
Then I took a truckload up to the consignment shop. LOL I feel 100 pounds lighter and hopefully I make a few bucks. That's always nice to get a check in the mail for doing nothing -even if its $10 or $15 dollars. It all adds up!
I took care of one my 'problems' by calling the state revenue and applied for another sales tax license. Seems ex took it upon himself to cancel my other one. So I'm legal now!
It feels good taking things one step at a time, doing the right thing, no lying or denial...life is good -and the sun is shining.
Great big hugs to all of you.
A lady who is interested in my hens saw me walking dogs and I went with her to her farm to see her 'stuff'. I'm hopeful she'll take the hens and maybe a few goats she said. They would only be about 2 miles from me so I can see them often. That makes me very happy.
Then I took a truckload up to the consignment shop. LOL I feel 100 pounds lighter and hopefully I make a few bucks. That's always nice to get a check in the mail for doing nothing -even if its $10 or $15 dollars. It all adds up!
I took care of one my 'problems' by calling the state revenue and applied for another sales tax license. Seems ex took it upon himself to cancel my other one. So I'm legal now!
It feels good taking things one step at a time, doing the right thing, no lying or denial...life is good -and the sun is shining.
Great big hugs to all of you.
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