Day 3
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 2
Day 3
My last drink was Saturday morning at 4 AM. I think -- I actually can't remember it very well. I've been drinking a bottle of wine a night for a year, sometimes two, and I kept thinking this was no big deal until I realized I had blown up all my relationships, blown an unbelievable amount of money, had no direction and I'm actually transient. I've been living in a hotel for four months.
I always figured I would stop this when I was ready, when I had something else to do, when I didn't feel like it anymore. I am up all night drinking and I sleep all day usually -- I kept trying to get myself on a schedule and realized that when I was awake all day all I wanted after a certain number of conscious hours was my alcohol.
Well, so Thursday night last week I drank two and a half bottles of really good wine. Then the next night I woke up and drank another two and a half and passed out. When I woke up eight hours later I was still drunk, carrying on conversations, paying bills, saying hello to people.
And then I thought okay, it's time to stop this now.
The first twenty four hours I was sick. I had terrible stomach cramps, no shakes, but sick. My liver actually hurt.
The next 24 hours I was exhausted, not quite as sick, no appetite but my blood sugar was up and down. I fell asleep about 3 AM and didn't wake up til about seven at night, two hours ago. I got water, vitamins, lots of b, meds and now I'm exhausted again and I want to go back to bed.
I don't have the shakes and my stomach is a little better but I feel confused and dizzy. Can't believe I did this to myself. I think I can now pronounce myself alcohol dependent. You don't even realize how badly you were doing, until you stop. Why am I so tired? I guess I wasnt really sleeping for a whole year.
I always figured I would stop this when I was ready, when I had something else to do, when I didn't feel like it anymore. I am up all night drinking and I sleep all day usually -- I kept trying to get myself on a schedule and realized that when I was awake all day all I wanted after a certain number of conscious hours was my alcohol.
Well, so Thursday night last week I drank two and a half bottles of really good wine. Then the next night I woke up and drank another two and a half and passed out. When I woke up eight hours later I was still drunk, carrying on conversations, paying bills, saying hello to people.
And then I thought okay, it's time to stop this now.
The first twenty four hours I was sick. I had terrible stomach cramps, no shakes, but sick. My liver actually hurt.
The next 24 hours I was exhausted, not quite as sick, no appetite but my blood sugar was up and down. I fell asleep about 3 AM and didn't wake up til about seven at night, two hours ago. I got water, vitamins, lots of b, meds and now I'm exhausted again and I want to go back to bed.
I don't have the shakes and my stomach is a little better but I feel confused and dizzy. Can't believe I did this to myself. I think I can now pronounce myself alcohol dependent. You don't even realize how badly you were doing, until you stop. Why am I so tired? I guess I wasnt really sleeping for a whole year.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Cary, NC
Posts: 715
Hi lastcall Welcome to SR
Detox can be dangerous - see a doctor if you need to.
I think a lot of times I never knew how bad it was getting, no matter the stuff I did, until I looked in the mirror and had one of those rare moments of clarity. Glad you're here.
Detox can be dangerous - see a doctor if you need to.
I think a lot of times I never knew how bad it was getting, no matter the stuff I did, until I looked in the mirror and had one of those rare moments of clarity. Glad you're here.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 2
Thanks, I'm doing better. I've been off substances for a couple days here and there but I never counted the hours like this. I've got two more til i hit 72. The reason I'm counting the hours is because I've never been this sick before without it. I realize this is not a good sign.
Physically I'm feeling better. Hungry. But dizzy and tired. After sleeping almost a whole day it's hard to now even though I tried. I walked around a little bit and felt like I was dreaming. Not hallucinating though or nauseated or anything else very serious. I'm stunned at myself. What the hell was I thinking?
Physically I'm feeling better. Hungry. But dizzy and tired. After sleeping almost a whole day it's hard to now even though I tried. I walked around a little bit and felt like I was dreaming. Not hallucinating though or nauseated or anything else very serious. I'm stunned at myself. What the hell was I thinking?
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Up, Up and Away
Posts: 434
Welcome to SR, lastcall. The first few days without alcohol can be tough. But if you are starting to feel better, it sounds like you are through the worst part. Sleeping is good as it helps your body to heal itself. You are lucky there, as a lot of people have trouble sleeping at first.
Keep reading and posting, don't drink, and I'll see you around the forum.
Keep reading and posting, don't drink, and I'll see you around the forum.
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Hi lastcall and welcome....... (I like the name!) Glad you've decided to get your life back. I think you hit the nail on the head when you said I'm still discovering things after 10 months and wondering how I put up with drinking for so long.
Take it a day at a time and hang in there. Feeling tired is common in early sobriety..... I felt that way for quite some time (a couple months, really), but it did get a little better each day.
You don't even realize how badly you were doing, until you stop.
Take it a day at a time and hang in there. Feeling tired is common in early sobriety..... I felt that way for quite some time (a couple months, really), but it did get a little better each day.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: New York
Posts: 35,731
Congratulations Lastcall! Your making a very wise decision. I don't know what I was thinking either. I think the alcohol was thinking for me. The first week is difficult! Sounds like your taking the right steps. Have you looked into any form of support? AA. Smart, an addiction counselor? It might help you face life sober and give you the tools to stay that way.
Best Wishes to You!
Best Wishes to You!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 426
Yep, we drink to help us sleep when in reality it is actually keeping us from sleeping in a manner our bodies need to function, and it builds up on us. It really took a toll on me physically (the lack of GOOD sleep) and it is all too easy to get in a bad pattern. Glad you are here. Reach out for the help you need.
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