Enabling
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Murray Utah
Posts: 153
Enabling
I hate his whole enabling thing!!! i have such strong days, but slip and I go back to the CRAZY feeling!! Today I am tempter to turn in my sons' dealer. I know this kid really well and am angry at him..
I keep telling myself that my son is choosing to stay at his house and not to call the cops.. I need stregnth thrown my way HURRY!! UGH
I keep telling myself that my son is choosing to stay at his house and not to call the cops.. I need stregnth thrown my way HURRY!! UGH
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: In a good place
Posts: 4,482
I thought about turning in my daughter's dealer, too. I didn't because I was afraid of their retaliation, not hers. I'm glad I trusted my instincts because my daughter later told me two metro police officers used to visit the drug house, too (since been fired and prosecuted). I'm sure they could have found out who ratted them out.
My daughter did eventually share the address with her addiction doctor, and he reported them after several of his clients gave the same names and address. They are no longer in business
My daughter did eventually share the address with her addiction doctor, and he reported them after several of his clients gave the same names and address. They are no longer in business
Moment of Conception
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Planet Tragedy
Posts: 453
Originally Posted by Chino 
I thought about turning in my daughter's dealer, too. I didn't because I was afraid of their retaliation, not hers. I'm glad I trusted my instincts
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: central coast, ca
Posts: 1,652
Kharma /god/the universe will take care of that..focus back on yourself..alanon tells us not to prevent a crisis, but also not to create one (which I specialized in, hoping for a higher bottom for my AD)Also, when it all goes down, you will not have any guilt or negative feeling because you weren't a part of it..can't be blamed either...oh yeah, and there's ALWAYS another dealer/abusive boyfriend/trouble right around the corner..until they change, they find each other like human magnets
Last edited by keepinon; 02-28-2011 at 12:15 PM. Reason: added on
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Murray Utah
Posts: 153
I am still considering it... I know that my son will find his drugs anywhere not just where he is getting them now.. BUT this kid has a 12 year old sister living there and that is my logic behind my thinking... I dunno......
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: central coast, ca
Posts: 1,652
why don't you "play the tape to the end" like they taught my daughter(and us in rehab).You call the police..then what?
I also struggle with this as the drug den my daughter lived in has a child living there..unbelievably, he is being fosterd by the gma cuz the mom was in jail..the gma used to trade my RAD heroin for dishwashing..also babysitting.They are well known to the police and I've asked cop friends who told me they"can't just go in there and search"..I'm not sure anything would come out your report anyway..I have had same experience as outtolunch.
It helped me to put the focus back on me, rather than perseverating on those around my daughter who were just as sick as she was...
I also struggle with this as the drug den my daughter lived in has a child living there..unbelievably, he is being fosterd by the gma cuz the mom was in jail..the gma used to trade my RAD heroin for dishwashing..also babysitting.They are well known to the police and I've asked cop friends who told me they"can't just go in there and search"..I'm not sure anything would come out your report anyway..I have had same experience as outtolunch.
It helped me to put the focus back on me, rather than perseverating on those around my daughter who were just as sick as she was...
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Canada
Posts: 121
When we love a person who has an addiction, we look to place blame elsewhere, because their choices are so difficult for us to comprehend. They have made bad choices and when one dealer closes up shop another will take their place. The choice to use or not use, rests solely on the individual and turning in the dealer has little or no impact on their choice to use. Best Wishes to you in finding your Serenity.
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