MIBluebird

Day 10 of not drinking for me. I saw a news reporter yesterday on the Today show that talked about her experience with alcoholism. She said that one day she woke up and thought, "I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired." That pretty much sums it up for me. I love to drink myself into oblivion but feel sick with shame and guilt when the alcohol wears off. It is affecting everything in my life right now and I want to stay sober. I'm seeing an addiction therapist and she suggested AA meetings. I'm not comfortable with that yet so she suggested online...which is why I'm here....to see what others are experiencing and what is helping. I would love some insight....

SSIL75

Welcome! Sick and Tired about sums it up! I can't believe how much I enjoy normal life now. That which I thought was boring and dull is totally not. Boring and dull was living in an alcoholic haze!

I have been sober for 6 mos with no end in sight. I do not use AA or any other formal recovery program. I use some rational recovery concepts. Mostly I stay sober because I enjoy life much more now and accept that 'just a few' is a non starter for me.

Welcome and good luck!

silly

Anything you can do to stay sober, you should do. AA meetings can be really great but you have to find the right ones. Some can really suck. So if one doesn't seem right for you, go to another and another. You'll find one you'll want to keep going back to, I know it!

least

Welcome to the family. I see an addiction counselor too, have been for three years now. She's a great help, as is this fantastic site. I'm glad you found us.

MIBluebird

I love dogs too...three golden retrievers, one is sleeping under my desk right now (I work from home). Most of the time I like my dogs better then people but that's probably because I hide out at home due to my alcoholism.

Dee74

Welcome MIBluebird

I used to love to drink myself into oblivion too...to escape.

I realise know I was not a particularly happy man.
That's changed now - with some time and work.

Being part of the community here has really helped me too.
You'll find a lot of support here...

Welcome
D

NEOMARXIST

I too was sick and tired of the booze and feeling so hopeless and like I had just wasted everything and chucked it all away. Had I have continued to take that first drink then I would have lost everything and made it so I would have had no way out. Prison, mental hospital, death pretty much sums up where booze would take me - destroying everything in the process.

I recently celebrated 19 months sober and I can honestly say that I'm so grateful for that. For me it's a one day at a time deal and the only day that I don't pick up that first drink is 'just for today'. It hasn't been about the drink for a long time now, but rather living life.

I use SR, AA and much wisdom from elsewhere for my daily recovery. For me the crucial thing is change. Importantly a changed attitude, way of thinking and dealing with life as for me my alcoholism is a 'thinking' problem.

All The Best, Peace.

MIBluebird

Thanks for all of your posts - it has already made a difference. I feel like I should be feeling GREAT because I haven't had a drink in 10 days but I feel like I'm on a roller coaster, one minute happy and the next minute the depression sinks in. I don't want to have a drink, because one is never enough, and more than one will lead me right back down that road of denial and misery. I don't want to go through life in a haze, I want to live it to the fullest.

Anna

Good for you!

Know that you have made a great start in recovery and there is always lots of support here, so keep reading and posting.

artsoul

Welcome to the forum - Good for you for choosing a sober life.... I felt like I was on a roller coaster at first, too. Irritable one day, content the next.... some days I had no cravings, other days I was on this forum for hours.

The good news is that is gets better. Hang in there, take it one day at a time, and keep focused. If we can do it, you can too!

Winer249er

I like dogs better than people too ~ and I don't think that's necessarily my alcoholism talking. :-D Dogs are great and they warm the soul.

Welcome to the forum.

"I feel like I should be feeling GREAT because I haven't had a drink in 10 days but I feel like I'm on a roller coaster, one minute happy and the next minute the depression sinks in. I don't want to have a drink, because one is never enough, and more than one will lead me right back down that road of denial and misery. I don't want to go through life in a haze, I want to live it to the fullest. "

What has been working for me ~ don't base my actions on how I feel (good or bad). Now's the time for logic, not feelings.

PhiBetaLeta

Welcome!!! Sick and Tired is why I decided to get help. Sick and tired of lying:
...to those that love me the most
...why I 've gone in the basement 10 times
...about where the money went
...about where I was
...to a cop if he pulling me over
...why I have to go to the store
...and a mllion more.

It'so nice not yo have to lie. Life is much better this way.

I've been sober 7 days and love it.

KEEP FIGHTING THE FIGHT!
...

MIBluebird

I'm so glad I found this site...thanks to all who have posted to help me get through the nite. It's lonely without alcohol and only my thoughts. Drinking has always put me in a place where I felt happy alone or I was the life of the party when I was out. Not drinking feels good but my mind is in turmoil.....

CarolD

Welcome to our recovery community...

Good to know you are heading into a sober future
Keep in focus....early sobreity is a difficult time for most of us.

LiveLoveLearn82

Welcome to SR! This forum is really great, and a great place to come to when you need support or just something to keep you motivated to not start drinking. I am pretty new here (well, new posting anyway) and I too got tired of always feeling and looking like crap in the morning, and hiding from people because I wasn't completely sure if I did or said something stupid the night before etc. I only have a week and have yet to break my last 'break' of 11 days but I'm hopeful and using this forum often to stay focused!
Look forward to seeing you around here!

MIBluebird

Feeling and looking like crap in the morning...isn't that the truth. I have also been in hiding and it's miserable. But it's kind of miserable without alcohol too. Day at a time...which is a very hard thing for an instant gratification person like me. I made it 4 months last year...and thought I could go back to being a social drinker. That first glass of wine started me on the road of drinking even more then I was drinking before I quit. And, as of late, I was more content to stay at home and drink by myself. I think this forum will be a big help. In just one day, I've read so many posts that describe so many parts of my life...parts that I truly want to leave behind.