Introduction
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: NC
Posts: 65
Introduction
:day6
Hi, everyone. Just wanted to introduce myself and thank you all for your wonderful, supportive posts. I'm on day 23...so far, so good, thanks in part to the great info I've found lurking around here for the past few weeks. I am so grateful to have somehow found the wisdom and courage to stop before I hurt myself or someone else and before "hitting bottom" in the classic sense. I realize that now the hard part starts...figuring out what to replace the "partying" with. My approach so far has to been to get a lot of rest, eat well, generally take care of myself and try not to put too much pressure on myself to do anything specific except not drink. I'm getting back into some hobbies and enjoying reading...a lot on this forum, along with "Beyond the Influence" and other books on sobriety.
I have "stopped" many times before over the years, but this time I scared myself and I'm done with drinking. I look back over my journal over the past few years and see headings such as "scary drinking"...apparently it wasn't scary enough at the time, but I had an incident earlier this month that gave me a glimpse into where I was headed...and it terrified and really upset me. Thanks to my HP for providing this epiphany before something horrible actually happened. I know now that what I've considered "fun" since college (going out and getting wasted) is actually a progressive disease that will kill me, if I'm lucky and it doesn't first result in something worse such as me killing someone else.
My biggest challenge is going to be anticipating and defusing triggers...people, places, memories, feelings, etc., that make me want to drink. Days 1-22 passed without incident, but today, driving home from work, I suddenly got the urge to head to one of my old hangouts...hoping to see a guy I've had a flirtation with for a while. Of course intellectually I realize that considering I am committed to sobriety and this fellow's main hobby is hanging out in a bar, he isn't right for me...but that "I want" moment is hard. I want a glass of wine, I want to see Mr. X, etc. It's been relatively easy going here in the beginning because I had the holidays...after New Year's Eve, it will just be depressing, cold winter and I have to find some inner sunshine that doesn't come from a bottle to get me through to spring. Everyone here is a great source of inspiration...those who have been sober for a long time, those who have been sober a short time and those who are trying and struggling...you are all special for working on it and for talking about your efforts for the benefit of others.
My best to all.
Hi, everyone. Just wanted to introduce myself and thank you all for your wonderful, supportive posts. I'm on day 23...so far, so good, thanks in part to the great info I've found lurking around here for the past few weeks. I am so grateful to have somehow found the wisdom and courage to stop before I hurt myself or someone else and before "hitting bottom" in the classic sense. I realize that now the hard part starts...figuring out what to replace the "partying" with. My approach so far has to been to get a lot of rest, eat well, generally take care of myself and try not to put too much pressure on myself to do anything specific except not drink. I'm getting back into some hobbies and enjoying reading...a lot on this forum, along with "Beyond the Influence" and other books on sobriety.
I have "stopped" many times before over the years, but this time I scared myself and I'm done with drinking. I look back over my journal over the past few years and see headings such as "scary drinking"...apparently it wasn't scary enough at the time, but I had an incident earlier this month that gave me a glimpse into where I was headed...and it terrified and really upset me. Thanks to my HP for providing this epiphany before something horrible actually happened. I know now that what I've considered "fun" since college (going out and getting wasted) is actually a progressive disease that will kill me, if I'm lucky and it doesn't first result in something worse such as me killing someone else.
My biggest challenge is going to be anticipating and defusing triggers...people, places, memories, feelings, etc., that make me want to drink. Days 1-22 passed without incident, but today, driving home from work, I suddenly got the urge to head to one of my old hangouts...hoping to see a guy I've had a flirtation with for a while. Of course intellectually I realize that considering I am committed to sobriety and this fellow's main hobby is hanging out in a bar, he isn't right for me...but that "I want" moment is hard. I want a glass of wine, I want to see Mr. X, etc. It's been relatively easy going here in the beginning because I had the holidays...after New Year's Eve, it will just be depressing, cold winter and I have to find some inner sunshine that doesn't come from a bottle to get me through to spring. Everyone here is a great source of inspiration...those who have been sober for a long time, those who have been sober a short time and those who are trying and struggling...you are all special for working on it and for talking about your efforts for the benefit of others.
My best to all.
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,913
Welcome to SR, Vesna! You'll find a lot of support here. Congratulations on your sober time! 
Keep reading and post as often as you like. There's usually someone here to talk to. We're all in this together and we are here to support you!
Keep reading and post as often as you like. There's usually someone here to talk to. We're all in this together and we are here to support you!
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Welcome Vesna and congrats on your sober time!
Sorry to hear you're having one of those days...... In AA, they talk about HALT (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired), so be careful when you feel those things. Eat something, get some sleep, and be patient with the rest. There might be someone out there who's infinitely better for you than a guy in a bar. Hang in there!
Sorry to hear you're having one of those days...... In AA, they talk about HALT (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired), so be careful when you feel those things. Eat something, get some sleep, and be patient with the rest. There might be someone out there who's infinitely better for you than a guy in a bar. Hang in there!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 279
Welcome! I had a very similar moment driving home from work today. I suddenly started thinking about NYE and decided I wanted to drink!?!? I think it was the stress of the holidays and my job...anyway the feeling passed, but it is hard to shut that voice up! I am on day 18, congrats on 23.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,784
Welcome to the family!
Congrats on your sober time.
I've been sober a year now and it's been the best year ever. I hope we can be as much help to you as this place has been to me.
:ghug3
Congrats on your sober time. I've been sober a year now and it's been the best year ever. I hope we can be as much help to you as this place has been to me.:ghug3
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,512
Hi and Welcome!
I also find that the cold and darkness of January is not easy to deal with. It's a good idea to plan ahead and anticipate difficult situations. I did that every day early on, and it really helped me.
I also find that the cold and darkness of January is not easy to deal with. It's a good idea to plan ahead and anticipate difficult situations. I did that every day early on, and it really helped me.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: NC
Posts: 65
Thanks to everyone for the welcome! Artsoul, you are absolutely right about HALT...I'd had a very long day at work and had several of those items going on. I was very tired, and starving...and the time I feel the loneliest is usually when I'm heading home from work...I know there are chores to do at home and my sweet dog is waiting, but I'm done with what I "have" to do for the day and the whole empty evening stretches ahead, full of possibilities. Once I get home and see the doggie, I'm usually fine. I went home and made myself a nice low-carb pizza and watched an episode of Two and a Half Men. That show always cheers me up, and somehow it helps seeing what a mess alcoholic Charlie makes of his life at times.
Oakleaf, NYE will be a challenge for me, too. I haven't yet shared with any of my friends that I've stopped drinking, and NYE is typically a huge, sloppy, obnoxious drunkest. My strategy is to take some fantastic food and some kind of fancy/special non-alcoholic beverage that I love, and come home at a reasonable time. Last year I didn't drink and was home in time to watch the ball drop on TV...so I know it can be done. We can do it!! I don't think NYE is the right occasion, for me, to share with friends about my sobriety...so I will either pour drinks out as necessary or use the "on medication" excuse. And I will keep in mind how great I'll feel on 1/1/11...and how crappy most of the other people from the party will be feeling.
Oakleaf, NYE will be a challenge for me, too. I haven't yet shared with any of my friends that I've stopped drinking, and NYE is typically a huge, sloppy, obnoxious drunkest. My strategy is to take some fantastic food and some kind of fancy/special non-alcoholic beverage that I love, and come home at a reasonable time. Last year I didn't drink and was home in time to watch the ball drop on TV...so I know it can be done. We can do it!! I don't think NYE is the right occasion, for me, to share with friends about my sobriety...so I will either pour drinks out as necessary or use the "on medication" excuse. And I will keep in mind how great I'll feel on 1/1/11...and how crappy most of the other people from the party will be feeling.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Tampa
Posts: 178
If you need some sunshine, throw the money you once spent being a drunk (lol... I like thinking that way. makes the visual SOOO distasteful, no?) into a box. When you get to six months or a year, you might be able to get that sunshine on a cruise or a road trip (if gas is still around) anywhere, without ever worrying about a DUI. The bar is a place where people pay to get giddy and make monumental judgement mistakes anyways. The more we look back, the more the reality sets in. For me, well... I was paying to destroy my life and eliminate my ability to be legally sober enough after two drinks to go to the video store or to the grocery for a real thick steak, or whatever. Freedom is sweet!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: NC
Posts: 65
That's a great idea, iSpy! I can definitely use that money for something way better. Another distasteful "visual" for me would be to spend a couple hours laying on the cold, hard bathroom floor and see how much I enjoy it sober...because that is certainly where I'll end up if I make the poor choice to ever drink again.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
