Brand new here
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: London Ontario
Posts: 13
Brand new here
Hey
I'm grateful that I found this website, I've been doing some reading and I believe this will really help me with my road to recovery. I had my first drink at 14 and I'm now 46. It came and went but it's been every day for over a 2 years now. My first day without a drink was yesterday, and I don't remember how long it's been since I didn't have a day without alcohol.
My doctor told me about 8 months ago that I had elevated liver enzymes, but I could not stop. I believed that there were a lot of external events in my life that have kept me drinking, but I have now come to understand that I have been medicatying myself from emotions that I believed I could not experience. That came from the way I was raised.
Sleep won't come easily for a while, last night was very difficult. I was drinking a lot at the end, from 12 to 20 beers a day. But I know it will come at some point and that I deserve to live a whole life with all of the wonderful things that accompany it. Thanks for listening ....
I'm grateful that I found this website, I've been doing some reading and I believe this will really help me with my road to recovery. I had my first drink at 14 and I'm now 46. It came and went but it's been every day for over a 2 years now. My first day without a drink was yesterday, and I don't remember how long it's been since I didn't have a day without alcohol.
My doctor told me about 8 months ago that I had elevated liver enzymes, but I could not stop. I believed that there were a lot of external events in my life that have kept me drinking, but I have now come to understand that I have been medicatying myself from emotions that I believed I could not experience. That came from the way I was raised.
Sleep won't come easily for a while, last night was very difficult. I was drinking a lot at the end, from 12 to 20 beers a day. But I know it will come at some point and that I deserve to live a whole life with all of the wonderful things that accompany it. Thanks for listening ....
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Texas
Posts: 275
Welcome! I was on the same program..at least 12, usually 20, sometimes 30 Miller Lites a day, all day, for over 10 years. This forum is a big, big help. I'll be sober 30 days tomorrow, it's been quite a challenge, but I feel like a million bucks without the awful poisened feeling of being saturated with alcohol 24/7. Read a lot on here and continue posting. It gives you a good feeling of support, and most importantly that we are all in the same boat and you aren't alone. BEst wishes!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Rural OK
Posts: 329
TexsasNative, Way to go on the 30 days!!
Timetobeclean, Welcome! Lots of great people here with lots of sober experience. Stick around, get to know them. When you feel like a drink log on here and get some encouragement!
Timetobeclean, Welcome! Lots of great people here with lots of sober experience. Stick around, get to know them. When you feel like a drink log on here and get some encouragement!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: London Ontario
Posts: 13
Hey TexasNative
Congratulations on making it to where you have. I am really tired today but I can honestly say that I feel better after having one day with no alcohol. What have you done that's helped you through your first 30 days? I'm on am emotional roller coaster right now; that doesn't help so much ...
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Lowell
Posts: 345
First, congratulations Texas on 30 days, quite an accomplishment. Keep on keeping on, things just get better.
Timetobeclean, welcome to a great forum for help with recovery. People here are great caring, supportive and very helpful people.
Say your going to an AA meeting, that is a great start to sobriety. While there, try not to compare your story with others. Try to identify and relate instead, especially when it comes to feelings. Please, don't be afraid to reach out and introduce yourself and let people know that you are looking for help. That is something that helped me greatly when I first started to go to meetings. People were very helpful.
Hope to see you posting on your progress.
As far as sleeping, it will come in time as you start building up sober time.
It isn't so hard to put the drink down. The most difficult part is leaving it down. You can do it though. Many before you have.
God bless,
Harry
Timetobeclean, welcome to a great forum for help with recovery. People here are great caring, supportive and very helpful people.
Say your going to an AA meeting, that is a great start to sobriety. While there, try not to compare your story with others. Try to identify and relate instead, especially when it comes to feelings. Please, don't be afraid to reach out and introduce yourself and let people know that you are looking for help. That is something that helped me greatly when I first started to go to meetings. People were very helpful.
Hope to see you posting on your progress.
As far as sleeping, it will come in time as you start building up sober time.
It isn't so hard to put the drink down. The most difficult part is leaving it down. You can do it though. Many before you have.
God bless,
Harry
Groovy Dancer
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: The States
Posts: 4,751
Clean - Good your gin to an AA meeting. That should help a lot.
You will also find a lot of support here. The emotional roller coaster may be there for a while. You have been poisoning yourself for a long time. It will take a while for your mind and body to adjust without it. You will prob be tired for a while too, regardless of the sleep you get.
Good luck. You have made a great decision. Keep us posted.
You will also find a lot of support here. The emotional roller coaster may be there for a while. You have been poisoning yourself for a long time. It will take a while for your mind and body to adjust without it. You will prob be tired for a while too, regardless of the sleep you get.
Good luck. You have made a great decision. Keep us posted.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Texas
Posts: 275
Originally Posted by timetobeclean 
Congratulations on making it to where you have. I am really tired today but I can honestly say that I feel better after having one day with no alcohol. What have you done that's helped you through your first 30 days? I'm on am emotional roller coaster right now; that doesn't help so much ...
Grateful Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: MI
Posts: 1,080
I agree with TexasNative. I'm on day 5 and waking up with no hangover has been wonderful. One day at a time is great, and I personally us one hour at a time. Keep up the good work! Sleep is just starting to come for me.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: PA
Posts: 89
Hey Texas..we share the same anniversary...I will be 30 days tomorrow too.
The first 15 were very rocky to say the least...lots of anxiety but no physical withdrawal thank goodness! I am starting to feel more settled and SR has been invaluable towards that goal. I am also in therapy and have a great counselor and group, I meet with him one on one too. My husband joins me from time to time, and I am reading books on alcohol addiction have all helped me stay focused on my goal to stay away from the wine.
I was drinking an entire 750ml bottle and sometimes more 4-5 nites a week. I made it thru a 7 day vacation at the shore that was an annual winefest in the past....again VERY hard but worth it!!
Welcome to the newest newbies!!! Do your best to take it ONE DAY AT A TIME...stay in the present!
The first 15 were very rocky to say the least...lots of anxiety but no physical withdrawal thank goodness! I am starting to feel more settled and SR has been invaluable towards that goal. I am also in therapy and have a great counselor and group, I meet with him one on one too. My husband joins me from time to time, and I am reading books on alcohol addiction have all helped me stay focused on my goal to stay away from the wine.
I was drinking an entire 750ml bottle and sometimes more 4-5 nites a week. I made it thru a 7 day vacation at the shore that was an annual winefest in the past....again VERY hard but worth it!!
Welcome to the newest newbies!!! Do your best to take it ONE DAY AT A TIME...stay in the present!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: London Ontario
Posts: 13
Thanks for the thoughts Texas. Hey julez, I'm hoping by day 5 the sleep will be there. I don't care if it's just 3 or 4 hours of uninterrupted sleep. My mind was racing all last night and I remember having one of the most bizarre dreams I've ever had. I normally don't remember dreams after I wake up but there's still bits and pieces of this one floating around. I took a sleeping pill and it didn't do anything; I'll pass on those as I now know they won't help me anyway. Good luck huntwc it must be great to have a husband who has your back too. I think this process would be a lot easier not being a single person .... Thanks for the welcome Carol.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: PA
Posts: 89
Time...good luck to you too. Yes I am married and he is willing to join me in therapy BUT he is what is called at SR a "normie"; could take the drink or leave it. Communication about this has been very hard in many ways and the therapy is vital to closing the gap so we can move forward together. He enabled me for many years and we need to figure out why!
The best support is right here with the many caring SR posters. I hope you don't feel alone just because you are single...you are not at all..
The best support is right here with the many caring SR posters. I hope you don't feel alone just because you are single...you are not at all..
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: London Ontario
Posts: 13
Thanks dee74, I went to detox and was suppsoed to start a 21 day treatment program but I couldn't stay there. I felt like a trapped animal. Yesterday was day 2 without a drink and last night was just as bad as the first one. I thought about going to the walk in clinic (no family doctors available here) but feeling like this gives me somethign to think about when I think about another drink. I'm glad the weekend is almost here, it will allow me to lay down when I feel tired. Which I will be feeling big time by tomorrow if tonight is the same as the last two.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: New England
Posts: 5,285
Hey TTBC...welcome! I am on day 25, a feat I once thought was impossible. I am also single and from what I have seen here it is neither easier nor harder, just different.
The sleep will come, ironically for me, I dreamed vividly every night I drank and remembered everything...now I rarely remember anything about my dreams.
There is so much info here, I encourage you to read here. Its a great support network too:-)
The sleep will come, ironically for me, I dreamed vividly every night I drank and remembered everything...now I rarely remember anything about my dreams.
There is so much info here, I encourage you to read here. Its a great support network too:-)
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: London Ontario
Posts: 13
Hi LaFemme, thanks ... If you don't want to answer this question no worries. Are you attending AA meetings? If so, are they helping you? What other resources are you using? I really liked the bits and pieces of that "Get sober, stay sober" book that you commented on. Thanks ...
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