BadLove

So....I'm sure this is nothing unique, but I was just on my way home from work and thought "Hey, I've made it four days. That's pretty great. You know what would feel really good right now? A drink!" The idea half scared me and half seemed like an okay option.

Today I felt this intense depression lift just a little, which was a relief. But honestly, it makes me nervous that the moment all my drinking-related pain (hangovers, shame, secrets, wasted money) is not fresh in my mind, drinking won't seem like such a bad idea. I know I'm still physically withdrawing, and I am dedicated not to drink today, but the craving took me by surprise. It just seemed so casual, so possible. Hey, have a drink. No big deal.

Anyway, I just wanted to share. I guess one of my biggest fears is not being able to resist when a strong temptation hits. I think a big part of these early days will be learning to trust myself, moment by moment. Listening to the voice and remembering there is always a choice.

Thanks for being here, everyone. You give me hope.

Abby

loveon2legs

Hi Abby!!! Oh I know those feelings all too well...I'm so glad you didn't give in!! you should be sooo proud of yourself!!!! Those feelings come over you just out of the blue...actually I had one today!! and it scared the crap out of me...I'm just shy of 4 months...so it goes to show they can and will happen...but lesser as the time goes on...I came home and grabbed a bite too eat.. I didn't eat today..which is bad....so keep on keepin' on you are doing great!!!!

Hugs!!!

Margareth

Nasty eh?

I've been there many times and caved too. It is your disease sneaking up on you, hon. Don't let it do it to you. Because it's one big NOT Ok.

Reward yourself (Because I believe that's what it is) with something else like a good bath and something decadent to eat and a nice book while your in your bath.

least

With more sober time it gets easier to make the right choice almost automatically. Good for you for not drinking. Every time you resist the urge to drink, you get stronger.

Anna

Hi Abby,

Cravings can often take us by surprise. I think the trick is knowing that it is your addict-mind that is talking to you and learning to dismiss it.

NewBeginning010

to SR.. I totally understand where you are coming from. Just keep sharing & be aware of that "other" voice telling you its ok to have one, listen to the voice that knows better.

Take Care,

NB

Soph

Today is Day 45 for me and (big surprise) I had an argument with my 13 year old-who-thinks-he's-40 and I SO MUCH wanted to jump in my car and go buy wine.

I am still not out of the woods, and what stops me is SR and AA meetings and praying and eating a snack or going outside for a minute or etc etc ANYTHING but the one thing I feel like doing most which is having a glass of wine.

So thank you Abby for sharing, and staying sober, and I am staying sober too. In the morning we will wake up and be so proud, as I am every day that I wake up lately.

Soph::ghug3

pinkgurl87

Hey I have over a year and guess what I still get cravings. They never really go away at least they haven't so far. Though they do get easier and less often. It's normal to be craving after four days. Hang in their it does get better. Welcome to SR!!

AmericanGirl

Abby-- Those out-of-the-blue ones that seem so benign can be the most unsettling. Great job resisting the urge!

Horselover

Hi Abby. Yeah the cravings will come, but you're thinking ahead and that's great. Find a plan and KNOW they are only cravings and they do pass. Once you get through a couple you will see they aren't so bad and see you got through one already. Good for you!