tigger11

Tomorrow at 2:00 central, I go to STBXAH's atty's office to be deposed. Not sure if it's for his OP violation, or for the divorce, probably the latter. Not sure what being deposed means, but suppose she (his atty) can ask me anything she wants and I have to answer. Logically, I'm not too worried. I'm honest and have nothing to hide. But I'm easily intimidated when face to face with somebody who's grilling me. Guess I'm tired... there isn't often these days that I'm not... but I feel a little weepy and scared tonight about what lies before me tomorrow.

So... if you're so inclined, please say a little prayer that I have all the right answers to enhance my chances of things going my way.

Thanks all!
Hugs... Tigg

LaTeeDa

Being deposed is like testifying in court, except you don't have to do it in a courtroom full of people. And I have full confidence that you will have the right answers because the right answers are simply the truth. That's all. I hope you can rest peacefully tonight knowing the truth is all you need. (((())))

L

CookiesAreDone

A deposition is out of court testimony that will be shortened into written form to use in court, usually for discovery. You'll do fine!

Pelican

Peace, Hugs and Prayers

Freedom1990

Keeping you in my prayers, hon. It's okay to feel scared and weepy. Walk through the feelings to get past them. Please let us know how it goes, okay? :ghug3

mermaidgirl

Yup. Feel those feelings and let them fuel your answers. We are all pulling for you.

NYC_Chick

Hugs and prayers! Depositions happen every day. If you need a break, tell them that. If you don't understand something, tell them that too.

Also, if you are unclear why they are deposing you, then ask. If you don't like the answer, then ask to speak to an attorney before moving forward : ) Don't be intimidated! You are just as smart as the person asking the questions, no matter how they are asking.

Jadmack25

Tigger, I will be asking in prayer, for you to receive all you need tonight and tomorrow.

As has been said, all you need do is tell the truth, and let what is spoken by you, show it as it is.
Consider this deposition hearing as just one more station along your track to freedom.

If you are shakin in your shoes at saying what is the truth, I wonder how your STBXAH is feeling at the thought of hearing you?

Pamper yourself, as much as you possibly can and ask for a peaceful, calm mind both for tonight so you sleep well, and for tomorrow and the hearing.

Soon all this will be over, and you free to live without the misery and heartache of the alcohol damaged marriage.

Frankly I will be happy to just type XAH for him, instead of STBXAH....too many letters.

Stay with it, and believe in yourself.

God bless

drgnfly30

I've been deposed several times for work. Do you have representation? Typically, the boundaries for the questioning are outlined beforehand. For instance when the opposing counsel started questioning me on 'unrelated' things, my counsel would step in to stop questioning.

Remember that you are in control... like someone else said if you get tired, tell them you want a break. If you don't understand the question, request that they clarify. If you have counsel and aren't sure about something you can stop & ask to speak with them.

A court reporter will be there to record the testimony (mine were also video taped but most likely yours wont be). About a week after the deposition I was sent the transcription of the testimony which allowed me to review it for accuracy & make clarifcations if needed.

Good luck!

GiveLove

Just tell the truth, Tigger. The absolute truth - don't protect him by smoothing things over or bending the truth. You will be just fine. Pretend you're answering questions from SR people

tigger11

Ahhhh such wisdom and encouragement from my dear friends - Thank you!!! Although I loved every word everyone wrote, the two I liked best were:
1) Jadmack - I will be happy to type XAH for him.
2) Givelove - Pretend you're answering questions from SR people.

I've been reading this morning what being disposed means. Those of you who described it did so spot on. Thank you!

I wish my tummy would stop growling. I might have to take a break to stink up their loo. Tee hee. I'll certainly be taking at least one smoke break. I expect my atty to be there. I have a speech all set in my mind should STBXAH be there. Want to hear it? Ahhh... you're going to get it anyway...

"Unless there is an armed police officer and a metal detector as there is in the courthouse, I will not be in the same place with Mr. STBXAH. I am afraid of him. And if he were afraid of me, as he indicated by insisting on a civil order of protection against me, he wouldn’t want to be in the same place with me, either."

For if he is in the room, I'm not sure how I'll be able to move, much less speak.

Please be sending prayers and/or good thoughts my way at 2pm central.

XXXOOO - Tigg

cinderellawkids

*** At the end of the deposition the court reporter will asl you if you want to read and sign or waive that right. Always say read and sign. If you do not hear anything in 5 to 7 days call court reporting company and ask if the other counsel had it transcribed if they did, ask if your read and sign is ready. Dont order a seperate copy of your own unless you want to pay for it they arent cheap.

We always tell clients, only answer what is asked dont over elaborate.

tjp613

Thinking of you, Tigger!! (HUGS)

tigger11

F-I-V-E Grueling hours. My lawyer congratulated me afterward saying I did great. She had a look of sheer delight on her face when she handed over a document that showed that he had a wire transfer from out of country for a significant amount of $'s put into our joint account, and it was obviously something HIS atty didn't know about. The argument is essentially over his wanting me to shoulder part of his credit card debt, so this was a victory. I'm SO grateful that truth and decent, human behavior are on my side. I hope against hope that the result of today's 5 grueling hours is the realization by his atty that he doesn't have a leg to stand on, and he needs to go back to the original, and acceptable, settlement proposal, and not to trial. I hope we don't have to continue this crapola and have him deposed and another 5 hours worth of paying the atty is incurred.

Thank you for your prayers and support! I'm going to take a prescription happy pill, walk the doggie, and go to bed... well... soon. I'm working at the moment on a late night implementation with computers which is what I do to make a living.

XXXOOO to one and all!
Tigg

Freedom1990

I'm glad you checked back in today! :ghug3

ItsmeAlice

Sooo sorry it took them so long to see the futility of their fighting this thing further. I hope his attorney charges him extra for the wasted time.

I am not sorry, though, that you went through this. It only shows yet again that you are a strong, self reliant, empowered, and independent person who can endure any discomfort in order to live a free and happy life. Now, when someone comes to SR feeling fear and sadness over going through this same process you can be there with your story of strength and hope and give them a sense of power with your support.

You owe him STB nothing more. You've given all you are going to give. He will learn you are no longer the Tigg you once were. Pity for him.

So proud of you....so very proud!

Walk that pup and earn that money so you can prosper and then get some well deserved rest.

Did I mention that I'm so proud of you?

Alice

PHIZ007

Tigger....adding my love and support to the pile....I haven;t been around for a week or so so am only just catching up witht he posts! Glad it all went in the right direction for you. Hope you had a good rest afterwards too...Take care Phiz :0)

tigger11

AAAhhhhwwwwaaaahhhh Alice - I'm all mushy, warm and fuzzy inside... everyone else too. Let me clarify just a tad, though. I don't actually know what's going to happen going forward. Just have a good feeling from what happened today, as my atty seemed to do as well. And trying to keep a good outlook. I'll keep you up to date.

MMmmmuuuuwwwaaaahhh to all!

LaTeeDa

I'm glad this part is over. It sounds like a small victory. Soon, the whole thing will be over and you will be FREEEEEE!!!!!!!

L

Jadmack25

I am so very proud of you and for you. You are not Tigger the toy tiger anymore, you are a rip-poaring tigress.

I just startled RABF with a Yeehaa YES, YES, YES of sheer and utter joy.

Sounds like your STBXAH (there's that mouthful again) has given himself a knock out punch with that wire of money. What a bozo!!!


I can see ructions between him and his attorney, as he will not like being told to settle cause he blew his own case. That could really set him off like a rocket, (to outerspace I hope) and get him out of your hair at last.



Oh what a beautiful day it is. Tra la la la la.

God bless