Question about serving AH the divorce papers...
Just for today....
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Venus
Posts: 118
Question about serving AH the divorce papers...
I am doing my divorce Pro Per (no atty)...I have filed 2 other times before, so I got this! 
Anyway, I have never had to serve the paperwork while living with him...
I could have a "helper" serve him, but that would be awkward for me to ask a friend or neighbor, I could hire a server, but it says they have 91 days to serve them, I can't wait that long.. Plus AH watches my daughter during the day, and well....that doesn't make me comfortable...
I could send them certified mail, well my "helper" could, and he would get them while I am at work...but again he will have my daughter....will he go crazy? Our mail comes at 10:00, I work until 5:00.
I guess there is not really a good time to serve the paperwork eh?
I have given him a heads up that I am doing it this week, so he is ready...
I am just curious if anyone lived with the AH when they filed for divorce and how did you serve the paperwork?
Thanks
Anyway, I have never had to serve the paperwork while living with him...
I could have a "helper" serve him, but that would be awkward for me to ask a friend or neighbor, I could hire a server, but it says they have 91 days to serve them, I can't wait that long.. Plus AH watches my daughter during the day, and well....that doesn't make me comfortable...
I could send them certified mail, well my "helper" could, and he would get them while I am at work...but again he will have my daughter....will he go crazy? Our mail comes at 10:00, I work until 5:00.
I guess there is not really a good time to serve the paperwork eh?
I have given him a heads up that I am doing it this week, so he is ready...
I am just curious if anyone lived with the AH when they filed for divorce and how did you serve the paperwork?
Thanks
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 3,443
I did. I had already gotten child care for our children though.
I told him he'd be served. I'd bring them home and he could either sign them or not. It made no difference to me but if he chose not to the police would serve him.
He ended up going to treatment before he was served and so he was served up there. After much bluster he signed them.
I told him he'd be served. I'd bring them home and he could either sign them or not. It made no difference to me but if he chose not to the police would serve him.
He ended up going to treatment before he was served and so he was served up there. After much bluster he signed them.
Just for today....
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Venus
Posts: 118
Thanks.
In my state it is illegal for me to personally serve him. Doing so could make my divorce null and void.
I decided to have a friend send the papers to him certified mail, this way he has to sign for it, and that will be my proof he received it.
I don't think he will have a problem signing the paperwork, he asked me last night if I wanted him to file, because he's low income (no job) it would be free for him to file. I said, nah, I'll just pay the money, but thanks anyway.
In my state it is illegal for me to personally serve him. Doing so could make my divorce null and void.
I decided to have a friend send the papers to him certified mail, this way he has to sign for it, and that will be my proof he received it.
I don't think he will have a problem signing the paperwork, he asked me last night if I wanted him to file, because he's low income (no job) it would be free for him to file. I said, nah, I'll just pay the money, but thanks anyway.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Wizard Land Downunder
Posts: 2,615
My daughter "served" me, as she was at her dad's when he told her he was going to get a man I loathed, to go to my place and give me the "surprise" package.
She told me later, that was the moment she had grave doubts about his version of why I left, so she put her foot down on his nasty idea.
I was very thankful that instead of a slimy creep turning up and gloating over it all, I got a sympathetic and more caring daughter do the deed. I am grateful that his animosity over this, tripped him up; it got my girl off her high horse and I got my daughter and grand daughter back in my life.
My close friend had her divorce papers served by the bailiff on what should have been her silver wedding anniversary.....by her husband's insistance. Lovely man...Yuk.
God bless
She told me later, that was the moment she had grave doubts about his version of why I left, so she put her foot down on his nasty idea.
I was very thankful that instead of a slimy creep turning up and gloating over it all, I got a sympathetic and more caring daughter do the deed. I am grateful that his animosity over this, tripped him up; it got my girl off her high horse and I got my daughter and grand daughter back in my life.
My close friend had her divorce papers served by the bailiff on what should have been her silver wedding anniversary.....by her husband's insistance. Lovely man...Yuk.
God bless
Member
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 633
I paid a process server arranged by my attorney to serve AH. He was still living in the house and not happy at all that I was divorcing him. I had to have him served at home because he drives all over town for his job and he refused to let me serve him by mail.
To say it did not go well would be a understatement. I let him know that the process server would be arriving that evening (had DS then 13 go to the basement to play video games so he would not see AH make a scene). When the process server rang the doorbell AH would not answer the door and went and hid in the spare bedroom (mature huh?).
I let them in and directed the PS to the room AH was in, he refused to take the papers so they dropped them at his feet and practically ran out of the house. The process server was so concerned for my safety that they called my attorney on his cell to tell him that he needed to call me and possibly the police.
To be honest I have pretty much blocked out the rest but AH spent the rest of the evening following me around the house yelling that he was never leaving and other things. He only stopped when I threatened to call the police and he heard my attorney call me. I had filed for a restraining order along with the divorce but it was denied as the judge did not think it was a emergency and wanted me to schedule a court date.
It took me another 5 weeks to get AH out of the house, by far the worst in my entire life (if you go back and read my old posts the whole sordid story is there).
I hope you have better luck than I did.
To say it did not go well would be a understatement. I let him know that the process server would be arriving that evening (had DS then 13 go to the basement to play video games so he would not see AH make a scene). When the process server rang the doorbell AH would not answer the door and went and hid in the spare bedroom (mature huh?).
I let them in and directed the PS to the room AH was in, he refused to take the papers so they dropped them at his feet and practically ran out of the house. The process server was so concerned for my safety that they called my attorney on his cell to tell him that he needed to call me and possibly the police.
To be honest I have pretty much blocked out the rest but AH spent the rest of the evening following me around the house yelling that he was never leaving and other things. He only stopped when I threatened to call the police and he heard my attorney call me. I had filed for a restraining order along with the divorce but it was denied as the judge did not think it was a emergency and wanted me to schedule a court date.
It took me another 5 weeks to get AH out of the house, by far the worst in my entire life (if you go back and read my old posts the whole sordid story is there).
I hope you have better luck than I did.
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