Just signed up for school
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Reality, NJ
Posts: 853
Just signed up for school
I have been back and forth with taking classes to finish my degree but with all the drama of previously living with an AH I always ended up dropping them. So today, I finally signed up for good. I picked a major that I love but am scared because its tough but I have never felt more sure that I can do this. By doing this, I just saw my whole world get better..I have a future now!!! I am in a financial position to do this and I am lucky. My divorce attorney asked me if I wanted him to pay for my degree and I said no..She asked this because that was the plan for us..for me to finish my degree after I had a baby. But I will talk to her further about this now and see what my options are. He took away many of my dreams but if I am entitled to this I may just do it. I was afraid to ask for it because I have more than him and that I would look petty doing so. But I no longer care about what he or his family thinks. I dont care if he pays for it or no because either way I will do it. Can you imagine I may get the life I want in the next couple years professionally? I am giddy with joy. I am going to note this date in my journal..The day I started thinking about MY future and not OUR future..
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Kansas
Posts: 10,182
Good for you! I got sidetracked more than once doing college while raising my two daughters, so I got classes in here and there.
I finally took the plunge and enrolled full-time at the age of 50! I will complete two associate degrees by December of this year.
I'm excited for you too! :ghug3
I finally took the plunge and enrolled full-time at the age of 50! I will complete two associate degrees by December of this year.
I'm excited for you too! :ghug3
To thine own self be true.
Join Date: May 2009
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 5,924
EXCELLENT!!! Good for you! NEVER doubt that finishing your education is the RIGHT thing to do. I did the same thing at age 32 after I got away from my X and into Recovery and I tell ya' it changed my life completely. I didn't finish college until I think age 37 and am only now at age 42 realizing the long-term benefits of it, but financial independence, for me, is really the key to emotional detachment. Because when I could not support myself financially, my position in the world caused me so much fear and worry. I just didn't have the resources to face what I faced every day. But when I had a partner who could share the financial burdens of life, or provide for both of us, I felt so much more secure in the world. But this made me emotionally dependent on that person!!! Not good.
If you can, while you are in undergrad, find something you are interested in doing and get an advanced degree while you are at it. I was able to get in a program that allowed me to earn Graduate credits while still an Undergrad (at Undergrad prices no less!) AND I was able to finish my Graduate degree in a year and a half. Believe me, that was well worth it in the long run!!!
If you can, while you are in undergrad, find something you are interested in doing and get an advanced degree while you are at it. I was able to get in a program that allowed me to earn Graduate credits while still an Undergrad (at Undergrad prices no less!) AND I was able to finish my Graduate degree in a year and a half. Believe me, that was well worth it in the long run!!!
Go ask the Multivax
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 2,481
Isn't that awsome! I did something similar, a big leap into the future. Fulfilling a dream of sorts. Of course I have no $$ So, I found out if you don't care if you get paid you can be ANYTHING. So, I voluntered as an art teacher for developmentally disabled adults. Then that led to a flurry of other things I could do.
Empowering! It doesn't matter what it is we do, just doing something just for us and our future is wonderful!
Empowering! It doesn't matter what it is we do, just doing something just for us and our future is wonderful!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Reality, NJ
Posts: 853
Originally Posted by Learn2Live 
EXCELLENT!!! Good for you! NEVER doubt that finishing your education is the RIGHT thing to do. I did the same thing at age 32 after I got away from my X and into Recovery and I tell ya' it changed my life completely. I didn't finish college until I think age 37 and am only now at age 42 realizing the long-term benefits of it, but financial independence, for me, is really the key to emotional detachment. Because when I could not support myself financially, my position in the world caused me so much fear and worry. I just didn't have the resources to face what I faced every day. But when I had a partner who could share the financial burdens of life, or provide for both of us, I felt so much more secure in the world. But this made me emotionally dependent on that person!!! Not good.
If you can, while you are in undergrad, find something you are interested in doing and get an advanced degree while you are at it. I was able to get in a program that allowed me to earn Graduate credits while still an Undergrad (at Undergrad prices no less!) AND I was able to finish my Graduate degree in a year and a half. Believe me, that was well worth it in the long run!!!
If you can, while you are in undergrad, find something you are interested in doing and get an advanced degree while you are at it. I was able to get in a program that allowed me to earn Graduate credits while still an Undergrad (at Undergrad prices no less!) AND I was able to finish my Graduate degree in a year and a half. Believe me, that was well worth it in the long run!!!
A jug fills drop by drop
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,784
Congratulations, lulu. Great decision! let us know how it goes.
I recall when I studied in Europe for a very brief period, I got classmates that were 30 or 40 or older... no one gave a damn about anyone's age.... I loved that, I loved that freedom and respect.
I recall when I studied in Europe for a very brief period, I got classmates that were 30 or 40 or older... no one gave a damn about anyone's age.... I loved that, I loved that freedom and respect.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Stumbling toward happiness
Posts: 4,706
Way to go, Lulu! I restarted college in my 40's after surviving my icky XA and will graduate this year. I have never had a single regret, and it has only made me stronger, smarter, and happier - a vital part of my never ever finding myself in that situation again.
Proud of you
Proud of you
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: South Africa
Posts: 330
Well done Lulu - got goosebumps when I read your post. Wow! You move fast my friend. So proud of you 
I also went back to college this year. May I add that at age 46 I am not even the oldest in my class - there is a man of 56!
I also went back to college this year. May I add that at age 46 I am not even the oldest in my class - there is a man of 56!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Reality, NJ
Posts: 853
Thanks all. I am a lucky girl. I have a good priest that sees me every week. I have a Christian counselor that helps me and alanon as well as my super duper sponsor. And I pray. I have worked really hard. It got to a point where after I reread Codependent no more I started rewriting it every night so that is really sticks in my head. I have my little email reminders through the day and I created a sheet of good slogans and quotes I got from here. Recovery is really hard work but I am worth it. I have to say though I have never been as exhausted as I am in the last few weeks. But even with that, I just get more sleep now. Taking care of me to get better!!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 174
Good for you!!! I signed up for school this spring, and that was when my big wake up call was and figuring out my problems and that they associate to codependency and living with an A. You should feel good about yourself and don't even feel guilty!
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