My story
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 1
My story
I met the man that I married on 8/23/05. A few months later I was in love and he had relapsed back into his heroin addiction. He was arrested on 4/1/06. I decided to stay with him, he was sentenced to drug court and florished. He gained back his family, his friends, his professional respect. And we were married on 6/21/2008. We had some some issues and life was never perfect, but we had our son on 8/21/2009 and we were a family. Only four months later we found out we were pregnant again- this time accidently. We were stressed and we were fighting a lot, but all and all I always thought there would be time to fix whatever problems we had.
On Feb. 20 I went to visit my cousin about three hours away. I left things badly. We had been fighting and when he called me Sunday morning. I didn't tell him I loved him back.
Later that Sunday on 2/21, I blew two tires coming home from my cousins. I talked to my husband who told me to call him to tell him what tires they were going to put on our van. He never answered the phone again.
My husband and the father of my children died all alone of a heroin overdose some time between 2-3 on that Sunday. He was found at his place of employment by his boss the next day. He was the love of my life. And now, no matter how many people rally around me - I feel competely lost and totally alone.
We can't fix anything anymore. The life that I was trying for is over. I feel like my life is over, but I have to keep getting up everyday. Tomorrow is my first day back at work and I just don't know if I can do it or not.
On Feb. 20 I went to visit my cousin about three hours away. I left things badly. We had been fighting and when he called me Sunday morning. I didn't tell him I loved him back.
Later that Sunday on 2/21, I blew two tires coming home from my cousins. I talked to my husband who told me to call him to tell him what tires they were going to put on our van. He never answered the phone again.
My husband and the father of my children died all alone of a heroin overdose some time between 2-3 on that Sunday. He was found at his place of employment by his boss the next day. He was the love of my life. And now, no matter how many people rally around me - I feel competely lost and totally alone.
We can't fix anything anymore. The life that I was trying for is over. I feel like my life is over, but I have to keep getting up everyday. Tomorrow is my first day back at work and I just don't know if I can do it or not.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 8
i am so sorry for your loss. My ex fiance is a heroin addict and i know all too well what this drug is capable of doing to a good person. Even though i broke it off my biggest fear is getting a phone call one day that he died of a heroin overdose. i cant imagine what u are going through. Heroin is a horrible drug to battle with. My deepest sympathies are with u.. take one minute at a time at work. if u have to go into the bathroom and cry for a few minutes do it. i know when i first went back to work after this first happened i tried my hardest to make it until lunch not to cry. then i tried my hardest to wait til the end of the day until i got in my car. I know my addict fiance didnt die, and i chose to leave but in a way it was like a death of the future we had planned for 8 years. Hang in there.. each day will get a lil easier.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Chicago area
Posts: 4,269
My heart aches for you and your children. You must understand that you did not cause this, could not control this and had no power to cure this.
Someone once told me that when we find ourselves in hell there is nothing left to do, but to keep on walking.
The life you dreamed of is over and another has just begun.
Have you considered professional grief counselling to help you over this tremendeous hump?
Someone once told me that when we find ourselves in hell there is nothing left to do, but to keep on walking.
The life you dreamed of is over and another has just begun.
Have you considered professional grief counselling to help you over this tremendeous hump?
grateful rca
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: atlanta, ga.
Posts: 4,671
welcome to sr.
i'm so sorry to hear of your loss, my heart goes out to you and your kids. i do understand your pain, you are not alone even though i know it really does feel like it. my husband of 23yrs was laid to rest on friday, 02/26/10, he passed away leaving me and 7 kids. though he was not home when he passed, i did recieve a heart felt letter from him 3 days before.
it does get lonely but each day seems a tad bit better than the day before. it helps me to continue to read and post here. i don't know how i could have gotten this far without all of these caring friends here. you, your kids and the rest of your families are in my prayers.
i'm so sorry to hear of your loss, my heart goes out to you and your kids. i do understand your pain, you are not alone even though i know it really does feel like it. my husband of 23yrs was laid to rest on friday, 02/26/10, he passed away leaving me and 7 kids. though he was not home when he passed, i did recieve a heart felt letter from him 3 days before.
it does get lonely but each day seems a tad bit better than the day before. it helps me to continue to read and post here. i don't know how i could have gotten this far without all of these caring friends here. you, your kids and the rest of your families are in my prayers.
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