Cat and the Cockroach
Cat and the Cockroach
Was watching the program Sober House and one of the counselors stated something very interesting. He said....
"You ever see a cat playing with a cockroach? That's what addicts do to the people that love them."
What an interesting way of putting it.
"You ever see a cat playing with a cockroach? That's what addicts do to the people that love them."
What an interesting way of putting it.
Made me think of my cats... rather standoffish at times... perhaps we could trade roles for a while... be the cat (standoffish) and leave the cockroaches (addicts) alone!!!:rotfxko
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 325
Dr. Drew's choice of words is interesting to me.
Nope never seen it.. never even heard of it. Nor do I think of the people who are the families of addicts as COCKROACHES.
I have heard of cats playing with mice.
I don't even like mice!! In fact I can't stand them. But if I saw a cat playing with a mouse- I would yell at the top of my lungs. STOP!!!!!!
Nope- some people don't have a problem with it. Even enjoy it. So long as the cat, isn't playing with them... comes purring up to them and they feel good.
I didn't see the show. But by any chance did Dr. Drew just generalize and talk about them. Or did he look at the addict directly and say- I think you treat the people you love like... That is bad.
Keep it simple Dr. Drew. Just be honest with them. Tell them directly. You are no different then their family and friends. You are not any nicer, kinder or caring then their parent. They do not know your family. No way in hell are you letting them anywhere near your children. Your home. You do not trust them. And you are not gonna be there for them if they go to prison. You are not gonna visit them or take their phone calls or put money on their books. Nor are you gonna pay for their funeral.
I think he is an enabler. He makes money off the addicts AND their families.
Nope never seen it.. never even heard of it. Nor do I think of the people who are the families of addicts as COCKROACHES.
I have heard of cats playing with mice.
I don't even like mice!! In fact I can't stand them. But if I saw a cat playing with a mouse- I would yell at the top of my lungs. STOP!!!!!!
Nope- some people don't have a problem with it. Even enjoy it. So long as the cat, isn't playing with them... comes purring up to them and they feel good.
I didn't see the show. But by any chance did Dr. Drew just generalize and talk about them. Or did he look at the addict directly and say- I think you treat the people you love like... That is bad.
Keep it simple Dr. Drew. Just be honest with them. Tell them directly. You are no different then their family and friends. You are not any nicer, kinder or caring then their parent. They do not know your family. No way in hell are you letting them anywhere near your children. Your home. You do not trust them. And you are not gonna be there for them if they go to prison. You are not gonna visit them or take their phone calls or put money on their books. Nor are you gonna pay for their funeral.
I think he is an enabler. He makes money off the addicts AND their families.
Do I feel I was manipulated by my XABF...yes.
Do I feel he toyed with me the way my cats toy with their mice (albeit fake ones)....yes.
Do I feel he would have brought me down and consumed me when I no longer served a purpose....yes.
SL!, you lost me in your post completely. Dr. Drew made an analogy, no? He didn't call loved ones of addicts cockroaches only compared them to something that falls prey to and is manipulated by another. I get that you would shout out when you see something (or someone) being preyed upon, but what are you saying about people who are okay with it as long as the predator comes purring up to them?? I'm confused.
From your post, I guess any rehab run for profit makes money off addiction and the familes affected by it. If people come way healthy and sober, should we still shame them for it?
Alice
Do I feel he toyed with me the way my cats toy with their mice (albeit fake ones)....yes.
Do I feel he would have brought me down and consumed me when I no longer served a purpose....yes.
SL!, you lost me in your post completely. Dr. Drew made an analogy, no? He didn't call loved ones of addicts cockroaches only compared them to something that falls prey to and is manipulated by another. I get that you would shout out when you see something (or someone) being preyed upon, but what are you saying about people who are okay with it as long as the predator comes purring up to them?? I'm confused.
From your post, I guess any rehab run for profit makes money off addiction and the familes affected by it. If people come way healthy and sober, should we still shame them for it?
Alice
Dr. Drew's choice of words is interesting to me.
Nope never seen it.. never even heard of it. Nor do I think of the people who are the families of addicts as COCKROACHES.
I have heard of cats playing with mice.
I don't even like mice!! In fact I can't stand them. But if I saw a cat playing with a mouse- I would yell at the top of my lungs. STOP!!!!!!
Nope- some people don't have a problem with it. Even enjoy it. So long as the cat, isn't playing with them... comes purring up to them and they feel good.
I didn't see the show. But by any chance did Dr. Drew just generalize and talk about them. Or did he look at the addict directly and say- I think you treat the people you love like... That is bad.
Keep it simple Dr. Drew. Just be honest with them. Tell them directly. You are no different then their family and friends. You are not any nicer, kinder or caring then their parent. They do not know your family. No way in hell are you letting them anywhere near your children. Your home. You do not trust them. And you are not gonna be there for them if they go to prison. You are not gonna visit them or take their phone calls or put money on their books. Nor are you gonna pay for their funeral.
I think he is an enabler. He makes money off the addicts AND their families.
Nope never seen it.. never even heard of it. Nor do I think of the people who are the families of addicts as COCKROACHES.
I have heard of cats playing with mice.
I don't even like mice!! In fact I can't stand them. But if I saw a cat playing with a mouse- I would yell at the top of my lungs. STOP!!!!!!
Nope- some people don't have a problem with it. Even enjoy it. So long as the cat, isn't playing with them... comes purring up to them and they feel good.
I didn't see the show. But by any chance did Dr. Drew just generalize and talk about them. Or did he look at the addict directly and say- I think you treat the people you love like... That is bad.
Keep it simple Dr. Drew. Just be honest with them. Tell them directly. You are no different then their family and friends. You are not any nicer, kinder or caring then their parent. They do not know your family. No way in hell are you letting them anywhere near your children. Your home. You do not trust them. And you are not gonna be there for them if they go to prison. You are not gonna visit them or take their phone calls or put money on their books. Nor are you gonna pay for their funeral.
I think he is an enabler. He makes money off the addicts AND their families.
As for Cats and Mice... I have 3 (very lovable) cats for that very reason... they are mousers... that is their "God given" talent... so as much as I despise mice ... I prefer cats to snakes :O If the mice aren't taken out they will take over... and attract snakes... so it is kinda like the addicts in our lives... they (mice) need to be kept in place (no not killed) or the really bad guys (snakes) take over.
Cockroaches are a part of life... and no families are not cockroaches... but families are put thru the ringer... time and time again.... it is simply an analogy... nothing more...nothing less.
Dr. Drew is not an enabler (IMHO)... he is part of a valid treatment center and Bless him for having the knowledge to put together a wonderful team of counselors to benefit the "celebrity addict/alcoholic" and having the smarts to help them, help educate us and make money... that's not such a bad thing... is it?
I'm assuming this was said to the addicts and this unappetizing graphic demonstration of how they view/treat us, was to shed light on their behavior while active in addiction.
If it was said to loved ones, I'm taking it as another reminder to not allow myself to be treated like a pest that lives in the dark.
A little off topic but it made me think of the sociopathic behavior mentioned in the What Addicts Do sticky. The last time my daughter relapsed, while I was kicking her out and she was in withdrawals, I said I can't live with a sociopath. Boy, that hit a nerve and she freaked out (she studied them in a criminology class). She's mentioned it a few times since then, it definitely left an imprint on her brain.
Maybe the cockroach analogy will leave one, too. It's left an imprint on my brain.
If it was said to loved ones, I'm taking it as another reminder to not allow myself to be treated like a pest that lives in the dark.
A little off topic but it made me think of the sociopathic behavior mentioned in the What Addicts Do sticky. The last time my daughter relapsed, while I was kicking her out and she was in withdrawals, I said I can't live with a sociopath. Boy, that hit a nerve and she freaked out (she studied them in a criminology class). She's mentioned it a few times since then, it definitely left an imprint on her brain.
Maybe the cockroach analogy will leave one, too. It's left an imprint on my brain.
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I watched Dr. Drew on Larry King live last night. They were talking about addiction. Dr. Drew was very insightful and honest.
He interviewed several recovering addicts/alcoholics as well and they all said the same thing we continually remind friends & family members of here:
He interviewed several recovering addicts/alcoholics as well and they all said the same thing we continually remind friends & family members of here:
- The addict has to do it on their own and do it for themselves. Recovery doesn't work if you aren't doing it for yourself.
- 12 step programs like AA are STILL the best and most successful recovery programs available when it comes to addiction/alcoholism. It works, if the addict works it.
- Recovery is possible. But the addict has to want it more than anything in the world.
- Hands off the addict. Family members can become as sick as the addict and need to work their own program of recovery.
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 325
I just don't like the guy! Respect him. But I do respect your opinions!
I caught a portion of Larry King last night. Dr. Drew was on there. But I liked what Tom Arnold had to say. He talked about his awakening. When he realized that it wasn't just about him. Words to the affect that when he realized his part. People actually died getting those drugs here. That is when it changed for him.
I also liked that he talked about AA. Said- if anyone needs help, go to AA- there are people there that will help you. When Dr. Drew is on TV, I only hear him talk about his treatment center and his TV show.
But I just think there comes a time.. you have to look at a person and use the words that you use to describe their past.. their parents.. other people and tell them, they are acting like those people who hurt them, abused them, abused them.
Nope- I think he enables self-pity and selfishness. His patients only seem to feel bad, sad, sorry for themselves. No empathy for others. Do they feel bad for what they did or do they feel bad that they were busted?
I think he enables them to continue to only think about themselves.
Kitty- just saw your post. Obviously I didn't see the whole show. I best stick to my ole hoola hoop!
I caught a portion of Larry King last night. Dr. Drew was on there. But I liked what Tom Arnold had to say. He talked about his awakening. When he realized that it wasn't just about him. Words to the affect that when he realized his part. People actually died getting those drugs here. That is when it changed for him.
I also liked that he talked about AA. Said- if anyone needs help, go to AA- there are people there that will help you. When Dr. Drew is on TV, I only hear him talk about his treatment center and his TV show.
But I just think there comes a time.. you have to look at a person and use the words that you use to describe their past.. their parents.. other people and tell them, they are acting like those people who hurt them, abused them, abused them.
Nope- I think he enables self-pity and selfishness. His patients only seem to feel bad, sad, sorry for themselves. No empathy for others. Do they feel bad for what they did or do they feel bad that they were busted?
I think he enables them to continue to only think about themselves.
Kitty- just saw your post. Obviously I didn't see the whole show. I best stick to my ole hoola hoop!
Making amends comes later in recovery, there are other steps before that. I think it's really important that they get in touch with their feelings because avoiding them is how they got to this place. It's the same thing for us on this side of the fence. I ignored all my crap and it's how I ended up focusing on other people.
StillLearning... at least you are still learning.
As for Drew touting his own show... that is the purpose of him being on Larry King... that is the way the TV world works.
Yes you have the right to use your own language... ultimately it is up to them to change... honestly if using the "right words" worked... many of us wouldn't be here.
IMHO I believe the behavior you are referring to is typical of addicts/alcoholics... that IS what they do... think only of themselves. Dr. Drew makes it possible for the rest of us to see our addict/alcoholic behavior(s) reflected in this reality show.... thus we all can learn a bit more.
I'm not pickin on you... I promise... if Dr. Drew gave them money, let them continue to act out and not hold them accountable... then maybe you could call him an enabler.
Blessings to you.
As for Drew touting his own show... that is the purpose of him being on Larry King... that is the way the TV world works.
But I just think there comes a time.. you have to look at a person and use the words that you use to describe their past.. their parents.. other people and tell them, they are acting like those people who hurt them, abused them, abused them.
Nope- I think he enables self-pity and selfishness. His patients only seem to feel bad, sad, sorry for themselves. No empathy for others. Do they feel bad for what they did or do they feel bad that they were busted?
I think he enables them to continue to only think about themselves.
I think he enables them to continue to only think about themselves.
I'm not pickin on you... I promise... if Dr. Drew gave them money, let them continue to act out and not hold them accountable... then maybe you could call him an enabler.
Blessings to you.
Dr. Drew knows alot about recovery......too bad Corey Haim didn't go on the show even though he had opportunities to. I don't know of any "star" that has really hit "rock bottom" (and i've been watching for years) or homeless Thats what happened to me..i WAS homeless. If i won the lotto tomorrow i would open a sober house, but not for "stars" per say....because we are all stars & winners if we get the chance to be!
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Location: new york
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The addict has to do it on their own and do it for themselves. Recovery doesn't work if you aren't doing it for yourself.
12 step programs like AA are STILL the best and most successful recovery programs available when it comes to addiction/alcoholism. It works, if the addict works it.
Recovery is possible. But the addict has to want it more than anything in the world.
Hands off the addict. Family members can become as sick as the addict and need to work their own program of recovery.
How true this is!!
12 step programs like AA are STILL the best and most successful recovery programs available when it comes to addiction/alcoholism. It works, if the addict works it.
Recovery is possible. But the addict has to want it more than anything in the world.
Hands off the addict. Family members can become as sick as the addict and need to work their own program of recovery.
How true this is!!
Yes, Anvil....thank you for clearing that up. It was A COUNSELOR who is also a RECOVERED DRUG ADDICT that said it. He's actually a pretty cool guy, giving back and staying clean.
I just thought the analogy was a very interesting one.
As for Dr. Drew or Intervention or the Sober House show the new one Addicted....I think it's awesome that these programs are on the Tele....sometimes it's the only was to open the eyes of some people who may ONLY watch TV....there are MORE OF US OUT THERE who may be lost and feeling isolated and may not know a way out...these shows if nothing else may just bring some light into their lives. So I support them all.
If it helps, it helps.
I just thought the analogy was a very interesting one.
As for Dr. Drew or Intervention or the Sober House show the new one Addicted....I think it's awesome that these programs are on the Tele....sometimes it's the only was to open the eyes of some people who may ONLY watch TV....there are MORE OF US OUT THERE who may be lost and feeling isolated and may not know a way out...these shows if nothing else may just bring some light into their lives. So I support them all.
If it helps, it helps.
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