qazqaz

Just wondering if anyone had any advice for the recovery road.

The A in my life has been in recovery for a couple of weeks and obviously trips out have been to a cafe not the pub, but I wondered if anyone had any tips for more useful things I can offer/do, like setting up a prevention plan for a wobbly/ potential relapse situation etc etc and the best way to go about such things.

I also am trying to figure out the best way to nudge him into seeing the alcoholism as a symptom, rather than a stand alone problem. He has been good with the aa meeings, but seems more reluctant to get the councelling lined up... although perhaps that should come later in recovery?

Thanks for any tips

Spiritual Seeker

I would leave his recovery to him if he's going to AA?
However, did he get a sponsor to actively work the steps with?

There is prob. also Al-anon mtgs. in your area. That will help you
understand the whole picture.

qazqaz

Thanks. Yes he has got a sponsor who he seems really happy with, and I am aware that someone like that will understand in a way I wont ever. However I am intending on going to Al-anon meetings; went to one this week and I can see it will help.

Kassie2

Your job will be to recover yourself - to practice healing and forgiveness - that means managing triggered responses from you -managing bad memories without having to say them out loud, learning to trust again and live a normal life. Sounds not like much but it is a lot. Going to alanon and reading here (the literature) and learning as much about the illness will do. He has to do his part and you cannot help - if there is something you can do he will tell you. Remember, part of recovery is learning to do things for and by themselves and our recovery is about the same for us - to stop doing for the A what they can do for themselves and focus on our lives.

trapeze

Al Anon has excellent reading material, both in the newcomer's packet (if you got one) and in other books/booklets. I've found a lot of help there.

There is a school of thought that it takes 90 days or so for the brain to clear out enough to get benefit from therapy. I don't know that I have a view about that. My husband is in counseling, and I would say he is just now getting real traction after 5 months of sobriety, but that's his story, and your husband may be different. Certainly the earlier counseling doesn't hurt anything.

My RAH and I attend couples therapy and it seems helpful. I don't believe he would have been ready for it after just a couple of weeks of recovery, as he was still fairly messed up in his thinking.

Good luck!