louis

I went to a new AA meeting the other day.... a woman came up to be during a smoke break and after speaking afew minutes said i'll give you my number... use it if you want or not.... At the end of the meeting i was about to leave and this woman called me over and said here's my number.... i said thanks and put it in my wallet... never expecting to use it but greatful i had it..

2 days later i was really struggling and i used it... it was so hard... i didn't realise how hard it would be to ring.... i mean a complete stranger especially when your feeling vulnerable already...

We chatted alittle while on the phone and tried to arrange to go to a meeting together but with my shifts for work it just wasn't happening... so she asked would i like to go to her's for a coffee...

I said yes... so the next day... i travelled to hers and we chatted... i have NEVER talked that long to anyone in person... we chatted for about 4hrs...
She told me some of her experiences with alcohol/feelings and i told her some of mine... it felt so natural... i felt so at ease...

I see a counselor... but talking to someone else who understands or relates to what i am going through was like nothing i like expected (not sure that makes sense)...

She answered loads of questions i had and I dont know what i am really trying to say... so i am going to say how i feel...

I have gone to afew meetings now and even though my brain knows i am in a room full of people... who all have the same issue as me... my head and heart felt so lonely and lost (how can you be in a room with 20 folk and be lonely?)... but after talking y'day... i didn't feel so lonely anymore.
I'm not saying its a miracle or that i wont feel lonely and lost again... but for y'day and still today as i have woken up i don't...

She helped me so much y'day.. i don't know if she realises how much!!!

I dont know why i even wrote this or if it makes any sense... but i needed to put it down... i hope you guys dont mind.

Be well
louis

Aysha

Makes perfect sense. Glad you found some comfort with someone who understands.

louis

Thanyou Chiyita.
Btw... the song link you put in... I love it...

yeahgr8

Thanks i really needed to read your post today! I am going to go to a meeting this weds about step 1 and 2, i don't want to go would be an understatement. I have to go and will just get in a taxi to the location, wlak through the door and enter the room without thinking about it! I am so lost to be honest:-)

Wonder if you realise how much you have helped me today? Well you do now, maybe you could let her know next time you speak;-)

You be well too :ghug3

ADayAtATime

Louis
I thought your post was very moving and it didn't need a title anyway.
I admire your strength and courage, I'm sure that it took a lot to reach out to someone you didn't know.
Anytime you need to talk, please come in here...we're here for you.
Take care
XOXO

aasharon90

Nice post.

What u shared will give a new comer
hope just like it has for you. You
share what happened to you and
thats the experience u have to
share with that newcomer.

That experience worked for you
and is keeping you sober another
day.

My purpose in life from the moment
i got sober to today is to share
my own ESH with others, of what
it was like drinking, what happened
to me and where I am now.

That's how it works to stay sober
one day at a time.

Those 12 steps set down before
us is a guideline to follow and live
by each day......everyday.

When u share with someone, it
allows u to get out of urself, out
of the pain u maybe feeling, and
focus on someone else....u even-
tually forget ur own problems
and thus u didnt have to pick
up a drink or use anything to
cope with.

Keep up the good work because
recovery and sobriety can be fun
and fullfilling.

Sobriety can look good on all of us
if u have the openmindedness,
willingness and honesty to go to
any lenghts to stay clean and sober.

Thanks for letting me share.

Anna

Louis,

That's a great post, full of hope!

least

A friendly understanding person can make a big difference in how we feel. I'm glad you have a friend!:ghug3

nocoincidence56

It's the same wherever you go. I have walked into meetings a complete stranger and realized the physical body is the only stranger.........

witt44

Great post to be honest !
There is so much hope in your post . And I can see the sunshine either .
You have opened yourself . That's the way .
I always had some problems with opening myself to some strangers and didn't like the word 'sponsor' .
What I can see now is I've begun more opened since the day I joined SR forum . And I feel much much better .
Never mind the weather . Keep your hope , sunshine , smile in your heart and mind . And do what you do today , HERE and NOW .

witt

HideorSeek

Alcoholism has been called the disease of isolation. Not only do we torture ourselves with ourselves, but also seem to be the "certain kind of person" who has difficulty trusting and reaching out. I know that this is very true of me, at least. I'm so worried what people will think of me, how I sound, etc. Heck, I even do it here, worrying about posting, worrying about how I sound, wondering why my post isn't acknowledged or responded to by very many, if any.

But I think one of the reasons that AA is so successful is BECAUSE people are very open about their vulnerabilities. It's strange to realize that you can know intimate details about someone's emotional map, yet not have any clue of their last name, what they do for a living, etc. Kind of the reverse of how relationships normally develop.

Anyways, I do know that I always feel welcome at a meeting and better going out than I did going in...even if I didn't think I felt iffy going in! I know that AA is a contentious topic here on SR, but I have found it to be invaluable to me.:ghug