angel126

Can an addict tell the truth about everything else and just lie about things that have to do with drugs and his addiction? he swears on everything he is truthful and 100% honest about everything else.

Nallabelle

I totally agree with Anvil.
I would like to say though that I started lying when my addiction got out of control. Most of the time, it had to do with my addiction. Like lying about where I was going or how much tips I made at work or anything else. So yeah I lied more in regards to the pills. But who really knows. Once you get numb to your own lies you really can lie about anything.

JustAYak

The only person I ever had to lie too was myself, so, for me it was just about addiction.

Iamlucy

I can lie about anything and have become very good at it. I can look right into someones eyes and tell a complete lie even if its something stupid that I didn't need to lie about.

I think it really depends on the person and what they're lying about.

If its something really serious and I know that I would loose something (drugs, people, things) I personally would lie to keep it. But thats just me.

So from an addict like me yes I would lie, especially if I was messed up. But its a one-off situation and everyone is different.

Shellslove

i agree w/all of the above and would like to add...w/addiction comes lies you never knew you'd tell...as Bell pointed out...about $, where you've been, what you were doing there....I was taking pills...and was lying about how many I was taking, how often I was getting them. "I'm sorry, I can't come out tonight b/c i'm sooo tired and over worked."..."I know I look worn out, I've got an awful stomach flu I just can't shake."..."I've been getting awful migraines (ok, that part's true) - so I'll need to leave early for yet another dr appt." I lied so much, to others and myself, that I began to believe my own lies. I would get SO offended and up on my high horse if anyone tried to defy me, that I convinced myself these lies were true. I didn't speak to accusatory friends and family, and in my head...it was truly b/c I was so upset they possibly thought I could be lying to them....the nerve!! (but HELLO...i WAS lying through my TEETH)...and at times, i was so lost in the abyss, I really believed it. Okay, maybe somewhere deep down I knew the truth...but that didn't come up until after the pills were done with. So can an addict lie about their addiction only...sure. But how will you ever know if they are lying or telling the truth about anything, when they don't know themselves???? Addiction takes over your life, so pretty soon you're lying about everything...when addiction is all that you've got.

Nallabelle

Im sorry I cant help but laugh at your post. That is so me. Wow addicts are so alike.

Shellslove

Exactly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Latte

I am a supreme actress. I can get almost anything I want. The good thing is that I don't want those things anymore. Anything I need these days I can get by being totally honest, and if I can't get it...I must not need it.

amirose

Wow, you have hit the nail on the head with that one!!! SOOO true... I guess this is the way all addicts operate!?? Or is it just us pillheads??

Shellslove

no...seriously though...it's funny now. I remember the day I had a 1/2 hr conversation w/my co-worker about how annoying it was that 'my closet constantly floods when it rains and the electricity ALWAYS goes out in my building!!!" And...I would sometimes get myself in such a tizzy envisioning the 'flat tire' I'd 'gotten on the way there' - that I would work myself into an anxiety attack over the stress of the 'situation.' - ridiculous how a mind (filled w/dope nontheless) can play tricks on us, no?

Iamlucy

Before I worked at my last job me and my ex owned a limo company and I lied sooo much to people; it was natural because of my lifestyle.

One time he was driving some executives from a big beer company which we all know but I won't name and they gave him a sky box ticket.

He didn't know because he's never been to a game and gave the ticket to a bum and this guy went to the box and started drinking their beer and eating their food.

And I looked right in his eyes and told him my ex thru it in the garbage and the bum found it. He looked at me and just got over it.

Its pretty easy to lie as long as you tell yourself its true.

In a way it seems like you lye to yourself by beliving someone you know is not telling the truth. I'm sorry but if your a sober person I would find someone else because for you this could go on forever and I've put a lot of people thru a lot of pain with my lies.

I'm not good at spelling without spellcheck (just a side note)

Lily

Man, I have the sweet innocent girl next door look and could lie lie lie to get what I wanted. Whether it be doctor shoppin, or my dealer.

I don't lie much today. I just hate it and it has to do mostly with my HP. However one thing I know and I agree with, it's a slow fade..when you give yourself away.... Look up slow fade on utube by casting crowns. It is very true...dishonesty doesn't happen all at once, it starts slowly in the little things until you are full blown...back into the lies, and addict behavior and using....

kj3880

I am that rare animal, I think, the addict who just isn't any good at the lying. You can spot it when I lie from a mile away, so I had to stop doing it. It just never worked out for me.

KJ

Tish28

Me too KJ.
It has never worked for me, thank goodness my other half stuck by me. I just do not
and cannot lie. It ALWAYS shows if I do.

jane_668

Me too.

I actually told my boss that I'm on drugs and as long as I'm doing a good job then it's nobody's business. I just donnot know how to lie. I wish ,though, i did a better job in lying.i would have spared myself few years of misery.But then again,if I was happy I would have never quit drugs. So thanks God for that.

angel126

He just swears up and down that drugs is the only thing he lies about and that he is doen lying about it now. he does them in front of me now knowing that I don't agree but I told him I didn't want him going behind my back anymore but it just makes me question if he lies about other things too. We have had many conversations about it and I am just frustrated. We are getting married in a few months. I guess I am waiting for a miracle. I am tired of it all coming before me and his next fix is more important that my well being or our well being as a couple.

Tish28

It sounds as if you're not ready to marry him....

change4penny

Hi, recovering opiate/cocaine addict,172 days clean.
During active addiction, for me, it was like living a double life. If need be, I could sell water to a well! I became very good at deceiving my family and friends. That is until towards the end of my 'run', so to speak. My addiction got so bad that I just didn't care anymore about who knew...I just wanted more! Funny, that's what my counselor in rehab said to me, "you are addicted to 'more'". She was right.
Lying is a big part of addiction. Telling the truth is a big part of recovery!

JMFburns

angel,

His drugs ARE more important than you or your relationship - no question about that.

My AS lies about anything and everything, just to keep up a front of a life.

If they lie about drugs, they're lying about everything else.

Sorry to be blunt.

Shellslove

Angel - I do want to add something else that I didn't get into, b/c I wasn't sure whether you were speaking of your SO. I will preface this by saying that my Afiance (then bf) and I were going through active addiction together at the time, so in a way, I'm sure the lies and reality got all mushed together, compounded by the fact that we were feeling our way through addiction and recovery individually and as a couple...so I'm sorry if I just confuse you btw this & my above statement (which was completely true), but I feel the need to share this w/you as well....

Throughout my addiction I never lied to my fiance, except for one specific time. We were both going through it, so it was much easier to come clean, but I feel I would have been honest w/him either way. Though we were both in active opiate addiction we mostly had separate DOC's and 'stashes' if you will.... our addictions were very separate....which is difficult to explain, but addiction can be a lonely place.

Anyways, as I said...I was very honest about everything to him. In the beginning, we were lying to ourselves, so in turn, to each other I assume....but I never out right bold faced lied to him. And though we were both using, we were always rooting for one another to get well... So I'd be sitting there w/my pills...but I'd ask him 'how are you doing today? cutting back? feeling more motivated?' etc. I was always honest w/him about how much/little I used, if I messed up bad, $....except for once.

He was already in a recovery program and I was trying to do it on my own. I swore to him I'd join him if I couldn't...I was doing alot more than I told him I was for only a few days...but was scared to get better...so I lied. In the end, I broke down and told him a) b/c I couldn't live w/lying to him and b) b/c I was out of dope, out of $ and terrified. He helped me get better...he took my hand and practically drug my sick a$$ to recovery....but first he threatened to leave me. He tells me now he never would have and was trying to scare me straight...but I feel pretty confident it could have ended an otherwise unshakeable relationship.

What I'm getting at here is he was the one person I would never lie to, could never lie to....I suppose things may have been different were only one of us using...and I suppose, in the end, there were more lies than I care to admit....but it's b/c we were lying to ourselves, though we both knew the truth. I don't know what your relationship is like....but even in addiction, I could never have outright lied to the love of my life. He has supported me through recovery in every way, and I believe he saved my life....if I had lied, things may have been different.

It's okay, I've confused myself too

I guess what I'm getting at is..maybe he is being real w/you?...you might never know. The question is...as a lover and as an addict...do you trust him? Perhaps you could be the one to help him and you could live happily ever after...b/c I do think it happens....but it's a choice you have to make. What is right for you? How much are you willing to sacrifice for this relationship...is it worth the burden you will have to bare? And even if he is worth it..is it right for you?? I think you should always go w/that gut feeling.